- Anti-Pickup Line

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There must be an angel missing from Heaven, because I've got it tied up in my basement. (It keeps saying something about a fancy dress party, but I'm not falling for that one again; that's how Batman escaped.)

A: Wanna go get some pizza and then have sex at my place?? B: No.. B: U don't like pizza? Some chinees then?

Roses are red, violets are blue. When I take a shit I think about you bitch flushes the toilet

Would you like to be the lone mother of my children?

Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

Do you believe in rape by first sight? Moral: I think its immoral enough as it is already.

GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

What happens when a drunk swedish man prank calls 911 from a local bar? The ambulance comes

Man: Do you work at Subway? Girl: Why? Did I just give u a 6 inch?

Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together Female: I don't need to rearrange the alphabet, N and O are already together!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The holocaust was a disaster, and so are you.

Monday went by and he didn't see her Tuesday was the same Wednesday came and the swelling had finally gone down for him to make his wife out

Men. We must always hold the door open, Pull the chairs out and pay for our women whilst remembering to treat them as equals.

man: wanna know how i know we're going to f**k tonight? woman: how? man: cuz im stronger than you!

Do you know why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

Him: I'd go through anything for you. Her: The exit's over there.

Woman: Ugh I wish I could remember who you are, I mean you could even have Aids or H.I.V... Man: Hey yo don worry, Dogta tol `d I am positive so thats that Moral: The H.I.V awareness group was a message: We will go literally f/ck ourselves to death have a nice day.

He says: Are you're from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. She says: Well, if we're making bad jokes: Are you from Illinois? Because you make me ill, and when I throw up from your face I'll make a lot of nois.

guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When you burst through the asphalt, emerging from the depths of hell.

And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

Anti-Pickup Line

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