You know, you can't spell "stud" without STD and U

why was the girl stupid beacuse she had brain sergy

Happy BirthdaySean!

Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

Stop Footing Around

Golf.

Dating tips 101: First you find a girl that likes you. Then you realize no girl likes you. Moral: Lesson done.

Boy: can i have your number? Jewish girl *pulls up sleeve*

Okay, I lied, the one below actually kinda works, people get impressed, it is quite the accomplishment you know... But since I am gonna get married soon I don't pick up as much as I should anyways. Moral: Man

-When you see the most beautiful girl ever, you take her next to a cliff, a manhole or whatever and you kick her off the cliff. Man: THIS IS SPARTA! Girl: Wow what a manly man! *dies* Moral: What? This is anti-pickup lines! And its not like you are gonna get the most beautiful girl ever anyways... Madness? THIS IS SPARTA!

Real life anti Joke mambo number five: Me: Hey wanna do it? Girl: I am a nun now remember? Me: Yeah but I always wanted to do it with a nun ;). Moral: She forgave me, nine years later :P

So do you want tonight to be consensual or not?

Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

-You know I've always had a thing for blondes -thats funny, i've always had a thing for girls

If you're still here when I get drunk, this is your lucky night.

Guy: Are you an angel? Girl: Wait till I die, i'll be one.

Q: Continue the pattern. 1,2,3,4,..... A: other numbers.

The word of today is "leg's",no whom are i kidding, bird is the word!

I'm a black belt at pretty much everything, Karate, Larate, Jiu-Jitsu, Kickpunching, Beltmaking, Taekwondo.........bedroom...|:D ~Rick, the Adventure Sphere

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I wouldn't.

- I think i lost my number, can i have yours? - I think i lost my number too.

- Hey, what do you do for a living? - Female impersonator

Man: Hey whore! I got a job for you! A blow-Job... get it? HAR HAR HARR! Woman: Wtf? Man: Just a joke whore... wanna come to my place?

- Is it hot in here, or is it just the broken A/C unit?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!