you work at subway? cuz you givin me a footlong;)

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-You know I've always had a thing for blondes -thats funny, i've always had a thing for girls

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Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

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Oh hotness I wanna bang you!

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Hi, I've taken like 8 dumps today... Wanna dance?

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Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put I and U together Female: You don't have to do anything because N and O are already together

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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-When you see the most beautiful girl ever, you take her next to a cliff, a manhole or whatever and you kick her off the cliff. Man: THIS IS SPARTA! Girl: Wow what a manly man! *dies* Moral: What? This is anti-pickup lines! And its not like you are gonna get the most beautiful girl ever anyways... Madness? THIS IS SPARTA!

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I'm an Ice Bear, I guess i just broke the "ICE" between us ....

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Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

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- I think i lost my number, can i have yours? - I think i lost my number too.

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Golf.

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hey,are you a parking ticket? because nobody likes you.

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You know, you can't spell "stud" without STD and U

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"I lost my virginity! Can I have yours?"

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why was the girl stupid beacuse she had brain sergy

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Hey nice shoes....Wanna F***?

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"My mom won't be home for hours..."

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I have a gun.

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Well there's the exit, will you go out with me?

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I'm a black belt at pretty much everything, Karate, Larate, Jiu-Jitsu, Kickpunching, Beltmaking, Taekwondo.........bedroom...|:D ~Rick, the Adventure Sphere

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Wow...you don't sweat much for a fat girl.

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Hey babe, if you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you. Oh really? Because if you were a pokemon, I'd fight you, win and not even bother to capture you.

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M:Hey baby you must be a GENERAL because your making my PRIVATES stand up F:Hmm, Your still a MAJOR disappointment See whaat i did tharrgh?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!