At a bar (another real life one): Man: You sort of look like a woman from a certain angle... I am so drunk I can pretend you are a woman all night long! ????: I AM A WOMAN! Man: How can we fix this so you can come home with me? Moral: Becoming unpopular was my goal, but third next to Justin Beiber? Maybe I overdid this a bit...

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Do you like a trimmed bush? Because I'm a gardener. Here's my business card, call me, seriously I need the work.

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A: Did I see you walking out of that bar or was it an angel? :D B: I'm your mom you pervert.

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Female Police officer: Anything you say can and will be held against you. Me: Boobies.

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A polar bear and a penguin were taking a bath. The polar bear asked the penguin to pass the soap. the penguin responded by saying,"What do i look like a microwave?"

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Do you work for UPS? 'Cause i could swear that you were checking out my package.

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You're so hot that if someone threw a grenade at you, I'd probably throw it back because falling on it sounds like a really dumb idea.

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Try to put your arm around her. If she pushes you away, then say: "Relax! Relax. I'll pay for the first abortion!"

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Him: I've got something that will fill you up. Her: Sorry, I'm looking for a meal, not an appetizer.

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TURRETES (or however you spell it) GUY ON PICKUP! Man: IM GONNA RAPE YOUUUUUUUUUUUU! Woman: EEEEEEEEEEK! (runs away) Man: I mean... I tried to say you seem nice...:( Moral: BOB SAGET!

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Whats yo sign? Do not enter!

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Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

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Boy: whats your name? Girl: i dont know, im just s fetus

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you in between F and CK.

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I love you more than my jar of fingers.

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Are you a unicorn cause u sure look horny girl:are u a turtle cause ur really slow ur the 10th guy to hit on me.....in 5 minutes

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"Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes." "They always say that before they go to sleep."

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Man: did you just fart cuz you blew me away! Woman: actually I did, sorry if it smells I had enchiladas for lunch.

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cockface

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Nice Shirt. It would look better on my bedroom floor.

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Grapist: I bet you like getting Graped, tied up and beaten muahahahahaha! I am so gonna do the worst things to you! Woman: YES PLEASE! Man: MAAAAAAAAAAAN your not fun anymore... Moral: Its not grape if she wants it... and I guess grapists dont like that... remember that girls whenever someone is gonna rape you just say YES unless they yell surprise though... then its surprise sex.

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Are you a parking ticket because I'm spending all my money on you and wish you were gone.

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Did it hurt? When I fell from Heaven? NO! WHen you were shot up from hell for stealing my pick up line!!!

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guy:do you know how much a polar bear weighs? girl: ..no, how much?? guy:i dunno but probly not as much as you

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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