- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

M: You make me wanna be a terrorist! W: Why? M: I so wanna blow on you right now...

Your breast is like a beer holder, you would allow me to store beer in between your breasts, while I talk on the phone

Are those space pants? Cause there's not enough space in my house to fit your ass.

Jack is riding his new yellow bicycle. His father bought it for his 12th anniversary. Jack is ecstatic to have his first ride down his street. Erick thinks its ugly.

What's a good comeback if a guy asked me "Bring me a sandwich"?? -COmeback with the goddamn sandwich

Hey girl, I just fuck my diapers, wanna change them ;) Moral: This has to be the one of the worst pickup lines in history.

Roses are red, something something, I am just too desperate to concentrate please let me just put it in you.

MAN- Wanna have sex? WOMAN- No get away from me you freak?!!! MAN- Well... I gave you a choice...

Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

why cant you comb your hair cuz you got cancer othere guy :ahahahaah fag

what goes up and down , side to side all the time? a compass get your mind out of the gudder.

Do you want to see something swell?

Man: Hey is your name Zelda? Woman: Huh? What kind of stupid name is THAT! Man: EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME PRINCESS! Woman: What a dork... Moral: The man did not link with the woman that night... nor ever it seems...

Guy- Hey, wanna come back to my place? Girl- Umm... I don't think 2 people can fit in that box...

is your name angel cuz that's all i see? is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

Man: Do you want to have sex at my house Women: No

-I wish i were DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes. -You're a loser

Wherever: Hi I am Tom Green! or Hey there, I am Jamie Kennedy! Moral: Hey there I am neither one of them, I am however the worlds third most pointless invention according to this site. (well strictly spoken, I am a lawyer, lol self irony)

Guy: Can I have your number ? Girl: We are six.

Hey baby, i like your hair -girl takes off wig

Woman: You've got the body of a god, too bad that it's Buddha... Man: You've got the face of a Princess, too bad that it's Diana.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book