This tux is rented by the hour, are you?

-Do you come here often? -Yeah, but now that you're here, I think I'll find another bar.

If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd probably leave it as is, seems to be working OK just fine without my internvention. And imagine the work it'd create in terms of all the re-filing alone. Librarians would have apoplexy, and if I came out I was responsible..well, there'd be hell to pay. No, thank you, but no thank you, the alphabet can stay as it is, no matter how hot your body.

It's not Rapee If you yell surprise!

Roses are red, Violets are Blue, Dont talk to me, and I wont talk to you.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I right next to each other. You say that you want me? Well don't what you come for!!

Boy: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Girl: Did it hurt when you were thrust through the ash-filled layers of Hell?

Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

If you were Mufasa I'd help scar push you off the ledge

Man: Oh.. girl you smell so nice... Girl: TRY ANOTHER LINE AND STOP LOOKING AT MY TlTS LOSER! Man: Uh... I am blind... Girl: Um...

- hey baby i wanna show you something - wait i wanna show you something too -what is it? -my fists

If you were on a shelf at build a bear workshop ....... I would stuff you , except it wouldn't be with cotton

Man: Do you like a sensitive guy? Women: Yeah, I used to be one.

Is that a mirror in your pocket? Use it next time you put your d**n make-up on.

Do you have sunburn, or are you always this hot? It's sunburn.

You wanna have sex and get married?? Ok... Sorry.

man-hey baby you wanna go somewhere girl-no thanks hells over there

I have the smallest erected dick in town, if you don't believe me ask my mama!

Guy- Hey girl do u like math Girl-um, sure Guy- ok I got a problem... Add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply the bodies.... What does that equal.... Girl- u and ur homo friends

Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

She - Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? becuase your-- He - I did not fall from heaven, you ignorant little twat.

Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

Hey you've got the most beautiful f*cked up teeth I've ever seen.

What did the priest say to the rabbi? We are both religious figures at the head of our places of worship.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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