If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

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He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

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adam burdass

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Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

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Hey you've got the most beautiful f*cked up teeth I've ever seen.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

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He: Did it hurt? She: When I fell from heaven? heard it before... He: No, when you fell from the ugly tree!

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Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

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*At a concert* guy- hey if you were that drum set, i'd bang you on that stage all night

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You must be a parking ticket. Because you are dressed like i'd have to pay.

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You smell just like my mom...

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Man: Oh.. girl you smell so nice... Girl: TRY ANOTHER LINE AND STOP LOOKING AT MY TlTS LOSER! Man: Uh... I am blind... Girl: Um...

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I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

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Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

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I take the the out of psychotherapist

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd probably leave it as is, seems to be working OK just fine without my internvention. And imagine the work it'd create in terms of all the re-filing alone. Librarians would have apoplexy, and if I came out I was responsible..well, there'd be hell to pay. No, thank you, but no thank you, the alphabet can stay as it is, no matter how hot your body.

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You want to sleep with me and i want to sleep with you. I'm at least half right.

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Roses are red Violates are blue Get in the van I have a gun.

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Man: HELP! HELP! MY PENIS IS GONE! SOMEONE HELP ME FIND IT! Woman: OMG I am a nurse, we must find it before its too late! Where did you last see it? Man: It... it was around inside my pants somewhere... It should not be too hard to find it... cuz its pretty big...

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"Are you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out." "I charge $80 with anesthesia, $40 without."

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are you from tennessee? because your license plate said it.

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I'd take you to the zoo but you might be mistaken for an elephant

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Why do cops eat donuts so much? Because they are delish

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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