you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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Girl, if your body was for sale... ...ID BUY THAT FOR A DOLLAR! Moral: Thank you Robocop.

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Male: Did it hurt??? Female: What, when I fell from heaven? Male: No, the first time you did anal!!!

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-My love for you is like diarrhea, I cant hold it in...

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Man and woman in bed, as the man looks troubled: Woman: Hey you are not in the mood? Whats wrong? Man looking down his pants: SNAKE! ANSWER ME! SNAKE WHATS WRONG? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKEEEEEEEEEEE! Woman: We arent gonna have sex huh? Man looks down pants again: Nuh huh... game over girl... game over...

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Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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The word of the day is ass, lets go upstairs and observe the word.

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Hey gorgeous what are you drinking? Cyanide.

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Man: Your body is a tempe! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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- I put the STD in STUD, all I need is U - ...

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-How did your date go last night? -It was going alright but then I started crying uncontrollably. -Nervous habit? -Pepper spray.

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-Did you just fart? Cause you blew me away.

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my girlfriend is really insecure about her weight so much so that I'm thinking about detaching the reverse alarm

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Sorry, I don't wanna date a guy who's best pickup line is cocaine.

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Wanna come home to my star destroyer and play with my lightsaber? No? How about just a trip down the Enterprise bridge to have fun with my romulans?... if you know what I mean? ;) ;)

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Man: Comon babe a little BJ wont hurt anyone get down..... Woman: sorry im alergic to peanuts

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Man at a restaurant (that is out of everything but bar stools and alcoholic drinks): Man: Die monster! You don't belong in this world! Woman: Uh? Oh! Nice tribute to the cheesy Castlevania lines! Man:Tribute!?! You steal men's souls and make them your slaves! Woman: Uh... well with most of you men lacking a spine nowadays... I cant truly disagree with you... Man: Your words are as empty as your soul! Mankind ill needs a savior such as you! Woman: Savior? Who do you think I am? But now I am annoyed *throws glass that breaks* have at you! *slaps man* Man: HYDRO STORM! Throws a flask of water upwards as it breaks on the floor splashing the woman... Woman: NOW I AM ALL WET! YOU MORON! Dont you know me? Man: Man: M-Maria? Uh... What happened? Shaft: Damn you broke free from your spell! But it is too late! Muahahaha! Castlevania has already become a bar! Richter: Well... that's fine to me, as long as Dracula does not STEAL MEN`S SOULS! Shaft: Relax, he is into business now... Richter: Your words are as empty as your soul! Mankind ill needs a businessman such as him! Shaft: Seriously! I invite you both at its VIP lounge and free beer to make up for the past mistakes... Richter: Excellent! But now feel my unbridled wrath!!!!! *punches Shaft* Shaft: Ouch! So... are we even now? Richter: Considering the free beer... okay... As they arrived Castle Barlevania they both got drunk and played "vampire killer" at the stage all night... Moral: Not much a Anti-Pick up line you say? Not only did Richter make a fool out of himself, but he also got her wet ;)

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-Hey baby, are you from Tennessee? Because you're like a solid 7.

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You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

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are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

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Me: Have you ever dreamed, of owning a thousand sparkly gems? Woman: No why? You got some? Me: No, but now but now we can dream together t under the sparkling stars under the sky... Moral: Hey, she said aww... And touched my hand before chatting with her friend... and as I turned my hand... was a piece of paper, with a written number...

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Q: How did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

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Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together Female: I don't need to rearrange the alphabet, N and O are already together!

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Whatever I'll just date myself.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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