Man: Hey you look good enough to do Woman: Oh really because so does my 8 foot boyfriend. Man: ... Woman: Do you want me to pick him up from the gym?

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rohypnol. rape drug

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Woman: The church is fantastic, I see Jesus wherever I go! Me: I see a psycho wherever you go. Moral: PSYCHO CRUSHER!

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What's worse than walking on a beach? Not walking on a beach.

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Boy- Didi it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until i saw you.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Not as much as my dick.

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Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! *walks away disgusted* Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

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Hey did you fall from Heaven? Cos I think you are angel. If I'd fallen from anywhere that high I'd be in hospital with serious injuries or dead. Do the logic.

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Are you a magnet, because i'm attracted to you. Yes, i am. So unless you want to have sex with metal, then i suggest you leave.

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hey wanna come back to my house, and help me kill my dog?

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The word of the day is ass, lets go upstairs and observe the word.

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i would traval the earth for you. well then im going to the moon.

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Guy: Are you looking for a hot, sexy, fertile young man? Girl: No thanks, I used to be one.

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Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

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Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

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Why are you crying? I have to walk out these woods alone!

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Do you know karate... 'Cause I wanna know if you can fight back!

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-How did you get to be so beautiful? -I must’ve been given your share.

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Real life anti Joke mambo number five: Me: Hey wanna do it? Girl: I am a nun now remember? Me: Yeah but I always wanted to do it with a nun ;). Moral: She forgave me, nine years later :P

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I like your eyes. My eyes don't like you.

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M: What's your name? W: Jenny. M: What's your number? W: eight-six-seven-five-three-oh-ni-yie-yen

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-What sign were you born under? -No Parking.

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damn, girl... you look like you put your socks on BOTH feet.

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HIM: Where have you been all my life? HER: I don't think I was born the first half of it

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!