Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Guy: Are you an angel? Girl: Wait till I die, i'll be one.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

thumb_up thumb_down +43

J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Male: Get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

sex me.

thumb_up thumb_down +105

Im gonna rape you..

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

thumb_up thumb_down -63

HIM: Where have you been all my life? HER: I don't think I was born the first half of it

thumb_up thumb_down +214

girl: i like you boy with downs: i liek trains

thumb_up thumb_down +54

- Hey, baby, are your parents retarded because you're pretty special.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

wow youre really pretty... just kidding youre fat

thumb_up thumb_down +155

"Do you like me?" "Do pigs fly?"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Im the demanding customer, your Dominos Pizza, I will make you Cum in 30 minutes or less.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

fancy going halves on a bastard?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

do you like cows? no! i am a cow! oh!

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

thumb_up thumb_down +71

Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Didnt I just meet you at world of warcraft? My nickname is desperaterapist838493

thumb_up thumb_down -44

-words can't describe how beautiful you are. -aaaawwwwwwww. -but numbers can. 3/10. -fffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

#1 You're breath smells like Skittles, can I taste the rainbow? No, because , while mine may smell like Skittles, yours reeks. #2 Girl: Hey, I got this new Kiss Proof lip gloss, wanna try it out? (there are 2 answers to this) 1.Boy: Well, yours may be Kiss Proof, but mines not, and I don't have time to re-apply this after 2. Yeah, I do want to try it out, but not with you.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Hey, do you want to dance? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!