Q: What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? A: My zipper.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Ask him nicely to come down, and if that doesn't work, he will most likely stay up there.

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Hey you must be Jabba the slut from Starwars... why are you crying? Moral: Moral is half the battle

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Guy: Hey baby, you must be a general, because you're making my PRIVATES stand at attention! Girl: Hmm..they're still a MAJOR disappointment.

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Still a better love story than Twilight

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I love Mark Wahlberg!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? I don't know. Quite a lot, actually.

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-My girlfriend and I want different things out of our relationship. -She wants marriage, children and a house. -I just want out.

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' together. -If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would take 'U' out entirely.

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I am terribly sorry for talking to you, but I was wondering if...

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In the USA: Man: Hello, I am half Iraq and half Afghanistan, my name is Osama Bin Allah! Girl: Oh... Uh em... I do not mind you nor anything but, you are like uh... civilized and stuff right? Just asking! Man: Of course miss, so how many camels to get into your pussy? Girl: OMG! Man: WAIT YOU MISHEAR ME! I SAY HOW MANY CARAMELS TO GET INTO YOUR... never mind... Moral: Seriously just give up, this must be the worst "pickupline" ever

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-Get in the Van

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showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

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Sung to the melody of Ozzy`s: "Moral Man" HEES THE MORAL MAN, IIIS HEE MORAL OR IS HE DEAD? HEES THE MORAL MAN AAARE THERE MORALS INSIDE HIS HEEAD. Moral: NOOO THERE ISNT! ONLY IMMORAL INSIDE! AND ILL KEEP POSTING, ONLY TO CRUSH YOUR INSIDES! *guitar solo begins*

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Pick up lines from the stoneage: Man: RARGH GROG BEAT YOU WITH CLUB! AND MAKE THE LITTLE GROGS WITH YOU! Woman: But I just had one! Aww not this again whatever... Moral: And over time women adjusted to clubs and often end up knocked up when passing out in them, While men that own their own clubs usually end up knocking up a lot more of them... Some things never change...

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Guy: What does a girl like you doing to a place like this? Girl: Trying to get away from you

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Are those space pants? Cause there's not enough space in my house to fit your ass.

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It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

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He: Do you like aardvarks? She: No. He: Neither do I, I'm Harold...

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He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

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Man... MAN! Sorry if I just skimmed that last message dude, but if you getting me that shit, you are my fucking God, you got a new custom engine or something? Whatever man, im getting over there right now, Son, I might actually try the towing trick, because that might make me arrive at your place (no worries wont tell anyone where your playboy mansion is at) but you still got it there right? MORAL MORAL MORAL MORAL... Oh and no, id never ever use that piece of shit I used to call a car in the forest, if you are serious man, ill take the damn cab! I mean man, I just cant wait to tell the beardy little faggot at the carshop to stick that yeah "car" up his gay ass! Seriously dude, my phone aint working but that can wait, you really mean I can have the car? Seriously, how much? I got some money.

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"Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes." "They always say that before they go to sleep."

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If i don't have sex in 30 seconds i'll have to kiss you

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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