M: If life had Alt + F4, I would close your clothes. F: Really? I would close YOU down!

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Guy: Hey :) Guy: Hey to you too :) Don't jump to conclusions people. They're gay.

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Do you have sunburn, or are you always this hot? It's sunburn.

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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Hey did you fall from Heaven? Cos I think you are angel. If I'd fallen from anywhere that high I'd be in hospital with serious injuries or dead. Do the logic.

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Guy:I got stds! Wanna do it? Girl:what the f*** did u just say?guy:oh std ummmm save the dogs?uh ya that save the dogs I own a animal shelter! Girl:I'm not stupid guy: u sure? (Slap)

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Are you from tennessee? Cause you've got fine written all over you.

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adam burdass

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Aww seriously dude? That would be awesome, gotta warn you though, this car repair dude, is really ripping my shirt off but you know, ill send you the bill. 666 (my phone is on the charger, get me a new one and ill write a fucking essay about my sisters ass and post it here I really need a phone)

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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To my story below, I now remember why she never took me seriously... While I was staring at her erect nipples she asked me if I was gay, I replied "uhuh", to everything as I was too busy looking at what I could have grabbed that day... Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! Today she looks uh... less appealing in more ways than one.... but lets not go into details, I need to get something out here... FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! In 40 years at my deathbed: The only thing I regret is... is... DAMN! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

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If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

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roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

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You are the personification of beauty. ,..Wanna Shag?

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Hey baby, I wanna solve your equation with longggg devision! ;)

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I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

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- I'd do anything for you. - Die.

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Did you fall from heaven because you landed on my wind shield some how

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hey i know spanish french german russian and Punjabi. got a talented tongue ;)

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Guy enters a bar: Guy: I have some really bad self-esteem and would really apreciate if someone would give me a chance and... Gorgeous woman: Hey, I would love to get to know you, and maybe take you home and... Guy: WHAT? THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN TO ME! I CANT HANDLE IT! HEEEEEEEEEEELP! (Runs out of bar screaming)

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- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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