Charmeleon is Red, Squirtle is Blue, If you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you.

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-Hey, what's your sign? -I don't know, but yours must be Cancer.

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Why are you crying? I have to walk out these woods alone!

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Was your dad a thief? Because he's in jail

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H3LL0 Girls, You need some THERAPEY? Call Nero The Moralman For A qualified TheRapist. The number? You wont get it, so then you will go mad with lust and need therapey Moral: Ooooh... I says ANTI Pickup line... Whats that? More Moral: Nothing is immoral! Everything is Moral MORAL MAN!

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I think I shit myself

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I may have never f*cked a 10 before, but I did f*ck five 2's.

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Can you leave your door unlocked and your underwear drawer open when you go to work?

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Man: Honestly! I am just desperate, and besides you are damn hot! Woman: Lets go to your place ;) Moral: This works, the anti-part is that no one will believe me nor try it themselves... Incredible how the easiest way is the least used...

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will you marry me

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"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

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I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

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are you a brush because you just swept me off my feet

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"is that a ladder in your tights? or a fire escape for the crabs?"

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I have a twin bed...we should have a threesome;)))

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You belong in heaven. So make sure you say hi to God for me.

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You stole my heart..... Don't worry, i have three more back home in my freezer.

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Waiter- For you, sir? Male: I'll have a Strawberry Daquiri, non-alcoholic, please. Waiter- And, for your company? Male: For her, a long-island-iced-tea, with a twist of Rohypnol.

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- How 'bout we go to your place and take a shower together? - I think my husband and little baby would get a kick out of that!

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Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

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Boy: You know the keyboard says that U and I are together. Girl: It also says JK

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At a bar (for originality`s sake :P) Man: Hello would you want to come home with me and uckucukucekcuah cough... AAAAAARRrghhhhhhhhhhhhhh (dies of heart attack) Woman: Wow that was an original line, ok ill come home with you... err... hello... uh... is everything okay? Moral: Despite this "joke" death is rarely a good pickup line.

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Girl: If you was a rollercoaster...I'd ride you all day long.. Guy: What? Am I not big enough for you now...why can't you just be happy with me... =_= Girl: : / I was tring to be all sexy in a cute way... Guy: Pfft. FREAK... e_e

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A couple wanted to try something different in the bedroom, The wife suggests they do it in a 69 position so they get into position but the wife lets one off in the husbands face she apologises and they try again when the wife farts again the husband gets up to leave and says no I don't think I can do this another 67 times!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!