-Do you come here often? -I'm about to.

"You look like Carmen Electra's deformed, burned, dismembered sister..."

Are you from Austrailia? Because I'd like to put my tongue in your butthole

M. Haven't I seen you some place before? W. That's why I don't go there anymore

Hello, it's nice to meet you.

Girl are your parents Mexican, cuz you look Mexican.

Are you an angel? ... cause I have an erection!

At a bar: Man: Hi according to horsehead network I am the third most useless "invention" in the world! Moral: See what I did there? No? Then go see the pointless inventions section :P

This doesn't have to be a rape.

At some random bar: Man: I am Duke Nukem! Woman: DISGUSTING! Man: Huh? Moral: Sometimes you have to play the new games to understand the old...

If you and I were squirrels, I'd bust a nut in that hole.

I've got candy.

I put the STD in Stud all I need is U

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

do you work at subway? 'cause you give me foot long. i'll do you a favour and cut it up

Hey good looking, what some mayonnaise?

Girl - You smell nice, what have you got on? Boy - I have a hardon but i didn't think you could smell it.

Guy: I got you a gift! Girl: Thanks.. make sure it's not you....

A man walks up to the woman, and says, "I'd like to take you on a date. How about dinner tonight?" The woman agrees, and they both have a wonderful time at a fancy Italian restaurant.

good thing i got my library card cuz im checking you out. i hate people who have library cards.

Man- Hey, baby, wanna come back to my house for some pizza and sex? Woman- No! Man- What's wrong, you don't like pizza?

Him. "I'd sure like to get into your pants." Her. "No thanks. One asshole in my pants is my limit."

He:*walks over* She: What is it now? He:*Unzips fly.* She : OH DEAR CHRIST NO

Sex?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!