Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you ascended from the depths of hell and broke through the earth's crust?

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Hey baby that dress is amazing! It would look even better as a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor!

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Guy: So do you wanna come over to my place? Girl: Not really but thanks for the offer.

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hey angel you duh sexy , if you duh rice i eat you everyday-pha haha

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Okay, now one where I actually succeeded okay? I know this is not like "goodpickuplines.com nor anything but hey... She: I used to have the nicest goldfish. Me: I got one myself. She: Really? Is it at your place? Me: Duh! She: Lol can we go see it? Me: Sure!... Oh wait... Oh, it died last week :( She: Can we like you know... still go see it? ;) *That sound you get when you score a billion billions on an arcade machine*

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Drunk guy with high standards part 3: Man: Dunno woman... you are so big and... and... FAT and really huge and stuff but... well... uh.. you are still really damn hot so lets do it! Man: YAAAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Astronauts: Did that guy really eject himself towards the sun? Moral: At least he was right about the really hot part... and that ladies and gentlemen, is the terrible end of the amazing drunk man with high standards, you can read the whole series just by clicking onwards trough my comments and give em a thumbs ups just as you go along.. otherwise they will show up... mean they wo..

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What's worse than walking on a beach? Not walking on a beach.

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I want you to come over, so we can go in my room, turn off the lights, go under the covers, and ill show you my glow in the dark watch..just kidding my penis.

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Gaywatch starts

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Male: If you were a booger, I'd pick you first. Female: If you were an ass, I would kick you first.

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why are you you touching me ????

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Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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you look fap-fap-fap-fabulous

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Yeah... you'll have to do.

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He: Will we have sex tonight? She: Yes, only I don't know with who you will.

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he got me some KY jelly for valentines day saying it was going to make me the happiest woman in the world he was right one squirt of that stuff on my doorknob and he couldn't get in no matter how hard he tried

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Why couldnt susie see out her window? She was not home, see was to busy drowning in the ocean.

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- Ma'm, do you have a cigarette? - I don't really want one, I just wanted to start a conversation with you.

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rohypnol. rape drug

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Guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together. Girl: That's funny because I'd put F and U together.

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If your right leg was Thanksgiving and your left leg was Christmas, could i come between the holidays?

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If I said you had a beautiful body I'd be lying.

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Guy: (Walks up to girl) "I do not think it is a girls body that makes her special, it is her personality that really counts". Girl: "Well that's to bad because you can't have sex with my personality". (Then walks away)

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I'd hit that.... with a truck.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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