I'd hit that.... with a truck.

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i wanna see your dick? i cant seem to find it...... sorry

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the most beatiful woman I have ever seen, so could you move out the way please

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Baby! you're on fire! Yeah, well I am an arsonist.

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guy:did you fall from heaven? girl:no? guy:sorry, it just looks like you landed on your face

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You're one-in-a-million. That means there is roughly 7,000 people exactly like you in the world.

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Guy: what do this pickup line and your face have in common? Girl: what? Guy: they are both poorly constructed.

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Woman: Quit staring at me and undressing me with your eyes! Man: I was just imagining you in a tasteful outfit.

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Chick:- Don't worry, we all get nervous when we meet people. My brother: yeah, but my buttcrack gets sweaty & smelly when i get nervous!

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At the library: So girl, how about we find a nice quiet place? Moral: Location, location...

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Woman: lol you are get nervous when I speak to you! Man: Yeah, I get nervous when fucking ugly attention seeking bitches speak to me, nothing personal its just you being a fucking ugly attention seeking bitch which happens to be speaking to me. Moral: Flawless Victory.

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- Did it hurt? - Yes.

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Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Woman enters gynecologist office: Man: YO I am the vaginator! Woman: Vaginator? Man: You know, the guy that is gonna fu.. I mean study your pussy with the long hard spear and see if your juices are okay and stuff... Woman: HuuuuuuuH? Moral: Writing this makes me understand why some women dont exactly enjoy a trip to the "Vaginator" so I forgot the moral and the point... my sympaties though...

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The below is no anti-pickupline unless you are a Jehova`s witness and want to uh... save my sole or something? Or just read a fun story... Moral: Like pick up lines is something one of them would use... actually they do after I reject their many offers... how? Keep on reading below to find out... its fun, promise. (unless you are a Jehova`s witness...)

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- Ma'm, do you have a cigarette? - I don't really want one, I just wanted to start a conversation with you.

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Boy- Can I buy you a drink? Girl- Sure, after seeing your face I'll need the strongest thing that they have.

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Vader getting it on ;): My sexual prowress overcomes even the power of the dark side. Can you even have sex? ... Uh... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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Ay Girl. Can I get yo digletts?

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you look fap-fap-fap-fabulous

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(this is only funny if ur a guy!) you go to a party im a man you get a drink im a man you laugh with friends im a man u see a hot chick im a man you invite her over to ur place im a man you go up in the bedroom im a man you go to pull her pants off im a man and she says... im a man!

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Got milk? Cuz baby, im of it!

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He - Hey Dreamboat! She - *turns around He - No you, shipwreck

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You're so beautiful you could be a tree... Or a high class prostitute

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!