J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Male: Get in the van.

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HIM: Where have you been all my life? HER: I don't think I was born the first half of it

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- Hey, baby, are your parents retarded because you're pretty special.

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Im gonna rape you..

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Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

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wow youre really pretty... just kidding youre fat

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sex me.

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

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girl: i like you boy with downs: i liek trains

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Guy: If you look at your keyboard, you see U and I together. Girl: Look underneath. It says JK.

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fancy going halves on a bastard?

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do you like cows? no! i am a cow! oh!

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"Do you like me?" "Do pigs fly?"

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Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

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Im the demanding customer, your Dominos Pizza, I will make you Cum in 30 minutes or less.

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Didnt I just meet you at world of warcraft? My nickname is desperaterapist838493

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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-words can't describe how beautiful you are. -aaaawwwwwwww. -but numbers can. 3/10. -fffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-

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Are you a unicorn cause u sure look horny girl:are u a turtle cause ur really slow ur the 10th guy to hit on me.....in 5 minutes

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Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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#1 You're breath smells like Skittles, can I taste the rainbow? No, because , while mine may smell like Skittles, yours reeks. #2 Girl: Hey, I got this new Kiss Proof lip gloss, wanna try it out? (there are 2 answers to this) 1.Boy: Well, yours may be Kiss Proof, but mines not, and I don't have time to re-apply this after 2. Yeah, I do want to try it out, but not with you.

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My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm but I accidentally gave her the glue stick, she is still not talking to me.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!