He: How do you like your eggs in the morning? She: Unfertilised!

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-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

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Do you why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

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Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

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You're gorgeous! Can you smell that? Oh god it's awful!

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Man: DTF Cutey? Woman: DTF off Asshole?

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HE: You must have some hot buns. SHE: Yeah? HE: Cause you got a real butterface to go with them.

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guy: do you like sea food? girl: hell yes, I got crabs, would you like some

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So, you're a girl, huh?

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Boy:do you know to spell "Idiot" with just one word? Girl:how? Boy:U

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Fear not moral man is back, in a moment of weakness I let myself go... let us put it this way... some like me, some hate me, that is what happens when people such as I speak their opinion. And if someday the entire world wants to destroy Moral Man... Moral Man will unleash doomsday! Moral: I am back, like me, hate me, you can still ignore me... but until I get some sleep and can start working out again (icy weather is not for bicycling is it?) Then Moral Man stands... Ps: Hey, thanks there below, my most thumbed up comments had minus 5 and such, so I got kinda down since I thought the internet too needed someone that speaks his mind. More Morals: But then I remembered I do this to entertain myself, and that you downvoters can all go screw yourselves! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAN! MORAL MAAAAAAAAN! Action figures in store now!

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“I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.” (Groucho Marx)

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4 out of 5 people enjoy being gangraped

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I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

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*At a concert* guy- hey if you were that drum set, i'd bang you on that stage all night

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M: Woah I am drunk baby... But I gotta say... you`re the hottest bitch in town! B: Bark bark!

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M. Excuse me Miss. You have seamen on the back of your jacket. W. Are you sure? It could just be Yoghurt. M. Most Definitely. I don't Cum Yoghurt.

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Guy: Hey, I think you're really sweet... Girl: Aww, thanks Guy: Is that why you're so fat?

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Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

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Man : Wanna go to my house tonight? Woman : I'm not sure if a rock can fit 2 people inside.

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As a man I am afforded greater opportunity then my equally qualified female counterparts. I have made it a life goal use this opportunities for greater good.

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Macho Man: Release the BOGUS! Woman: What? Super Macho Man: Never mind... no one will get this anyways... wanna go to McDonalds and get a Little Mac? Woman: Ok but I want a Big mac! Macho Man: What is a Big mac? Is it stronger than a little Mac? Woman: Huh? What do you mean? Macho Man: Sigh... and I actually fought Mike Tyson you know... Woman: So you are a boxer huh? Who are you gonna fight next? Macho Man: Sigh... Mr.Dream... Woman: Who the hell is that? Macho Man: a nobody...

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Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

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You look like one that does not charge for sex ;)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!