If i could rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and G and L and Y together because that is what you are.

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I'm desperate, you'll do.

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-As I slipped my finger in her hole I could feel her getting wetter and wetter, When I pulled it out she was going down on me. I should probably start looking for a new boat...

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Did it hurt when you fell from the whore tree and banged every single guy on your way down?

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Wanna come home to my star destroyer and play with my lightsaber? No? How about just a trip down the Enterprise bridge to have fun with my romulans?... if you know what I mean? ;) ;)

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No more morals? I read his crap for hours! Moral: ;( Bye man.

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So, you're a girl, huh?

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did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

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Woman: Hey is it true you black men have big penises? Black Man: Hell yeah woman! Mine is so big, its at least three times longer than my fist and at least 4 times as wide! Lets go get some hoe! Woman: Uh... well uh... its just that... uh... Moral: Be careful for what you wish for, when fantasy becomes reality... it may hurt....

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excuse me my eyes are up here thats great........where are your nipples

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As original as it gets: Domestical... Dog with a top hat and monocle: Yap Yap! *wiggles tail* woof woof! Dog?: MEOW!! HISS! *scratches dog and throws her drink at his face or you know... something that increases dramatic tension* and leaves. Dog: HOWL! *whimpers* :( *throws top hat away* Moral: They say every dog has his day, but I do not think this relationship was never meant to work out :(

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my girlfriend is really insecure about her weight so much so that I'm thinking about detaching the reverse alarm

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- Did it hurt? - What? - When you were catapaulted from the firey bowels of Hell?

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Man: Wanna go to my home and have sex? Woman: Well... OK! Man: Wow you are easy!... wait! Where are you going? COME BACK! Moral: They are not easy, they just like a man with balls... and you where obviously not one of them... LAME OVER.

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bitch: I like it when guys punch me. Me: I love it when you shut the hell up and leave.

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Guy:I got stds! Wanna do it? Girl:what the f*** did u just say?guy:oh std ummmm save the dogs?uh ya that save the dogs I own a animal shelter! Girl:I'm not stupid guy: u sure? (Slap)

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Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

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Him: What's it like in Hell? Her: Why are you asking me that? Him: Because you're the devil and I know where the f*ck you came from; I can see you're horny.

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As original as things get: Pickup in the future! Android: Greetings Alpha six zero zero,requesting access code for insertion of my intercourse-D.I.C.K card into your V.A.G 2.0 intercourse receiver! Another Android: Access granted Zero six nine eight, engaging card...System! Deactivate mini-android production systems and engage cooldown systems to avoid critical overheats, lubricate essentials for easy access, I have no entry code, engage at once! Moral: I honestly thought it would end up in failure, but damn androids are easy!

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-Good afternoon miss, would you care to try our new line of perfume? -Sure what's it called? -Chloroform...

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He: You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She: You are so handsome when you keep your mouth shut.

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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Dont people ever get tired of PRETENDING like they dont need others aproval? I NEED APPROVAL I NEED APPROVAL! Moral: I REALLY DO! YEEEEEEEEES BECAUSE...Uh...you matter more than me? Nah, nothing like that, only I matter more than you...

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man: may I impale you on my stake? woman: O.o (for goth girls)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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