- Anti-Pickup Line

Girl: Hey classy older man, wanna get to know me better? Man: Sigh... sorry lady I am the man that played Gandalf in that... shitty lords of something movie... Girl: so what? Man: Sigh... you know.. Gandalf the white and Gandalf the gay...? Girl: Huh? Man: Ever seen the X-men? Girl: Yeah... Man: ONE WORD: FAGNETO! Girl: uh.. okay.. "leaves". Ian McKellen: Sigh... should have come out of the closet sooner...

Are you doing push-ups with your knees down? Cuz im not sure if this is working out.

You're gorgeous! Can you smell that? Oh god it's awful!

How does a ghost walk through walls? There's normally a door.

In the USA: Man: Hello, I am half Iraq and half Afghanistan, my name is Osama Bin Allah! Girl: Oh... Uh em... I do not mind you nor anything but, you are like uh... civilized and stuff right? Just asking! Man: Of course miss, so how many camels to get into your pussy? Girl: OMG! Man: WAIT YOU MISHEAR ME! I SAY HOW MANY CARAMELS TO GET INTO YOUR... never mind... Moral: USA discovers they do not have nuclear weapons and then gives them nuclear reactors?

Man: Yeah I have done it with thousands of women all around the world... THOUSANDS! Woman: Okay... then ill come home with you, I want an experienced man to be my first... At his house: Woman: I AM SCARED! Will it hurt? Its my first time and... Man: I dunno! I am scared as Its my first time too! :( Moral: A man whose is scared of sex... pfffffff!

I put the STD in STuD all i need is U!

A man is pulled over by a police officer and a conversation takes place: Man: What's the problem officer? Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone. Man: No sir, I was going 65. Wife: Oh Steven. You were going 80. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light. Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light! Wife: Oh Steven, you've known about that tail light for weeks. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt. Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car. Wife: Oh Steven, you never wear your seat belt. Man: Shut your mouth, woman! Cop: Ma'am, does your husband always talk to you this way? Wife: No, only when he's drunk.

"is that a ladder in your tights? or a fire escape for the crabs?"

there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

Man: GASP! Why is my penis inside your vagina? Why do you keep thrusting and screami... Woman: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ASSHOLE! Man: Uh... what where am... Oh... Forgive me, I am a psychic and I keep getting premonitions of the near future... Moral: GASP WHAT ARE YOU FEMALE READERS DOING WITH MY PINGAS INSIDE YOUR MOUTH!

Why did the small girl run away? She saw her own coqu in the mirror.

I have one thing to say to all the woman who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

Why do cops eat donuts so much? Because they are delish

Guy -Are you from Tenessee? Girl -No. guy -oh, because you looked kinda southern.

Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

- Hey, I have 40 minutes to live and need to feel the touch of a woman to live. -I'm a dude.

Man: I will make the rape on you now woman! Woman: Wow great Borat imitation bravo! Man: Borat who? draws gun Moral: Pretty immoral

Batman bravely leaps in front of the Robin: Bats: WATCH OUT FOR THAT GAY-RAY! Bats suddenly grabs Robin and starts making out with him Bats: I am sorry, I cannot stop it... I... Robin: I am underage so maybe it was a pedo-ray or something... Joker: What gay ray? What pedo ray? It was suppose to disintegrate you! But whatever, I win. Moral: It was a looong trip back home.

- Yo baby can I have your number? - Sure! My number is one sticks up middle finger

Guy: Where have you been all my life? Girl: In my room hiding from you.

Hey, I got some of the worst ratings on Horsehead network! Really? Moral: You bet!

Hi there, the voices in my head are telling me to talk to you.

Did it hurt when you fell from the whore tree and banged every single guy on your way down?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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