Are you doing push-ups with your knees down? Cuz im not sure if this is working out.

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Monday went by and he didn't see her Tuesday was the same Wednesday came and the swelling had finally gone down for him to make his wife out

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Hey I used to be a man, but I'm pretty horny.

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Man and woman in bed: Man: You know I am somewhat a deviant right? Woman: Sure but I am drunk so lets just do it.. Man: I AM SO GONNA BANG YOU! (Man throws dynamite at woman) Woman: WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUU Moral: BANG INDEED... case closed.

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Guy: Da da da da da! I'm loving it. (looks at girl's crotch)

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Hi there, stand still, hmm, hmm... Well, your tits are firm, lets feel up ya pussy too huh? Then your... other thingie... Why you runnin? Moral: Believe in stuff!

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Man: Are you a beach? Cause I'm sure there's a lot of crabs crawling around down there

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free candy....

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Male: Paper or plastic? Female: What? Male: Paper or plastic, you know, to put over your head.

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Man: Would you like to dance? Woman: Hell No! Man: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said - You look fat in those pants!

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Actor walks in street... Woman: HEY ITS YOU! THE GUY THAT PLAYED GANDALF THE GAY!... Uh I mean Gandalf the GRAY! Actor: WRONG WOMAN! I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNETISM! Moral: Please take no insult Esteemed Mr.Ian McKellen you are a fantastic actor... as for the rest of you, feel free to feel as insulted as you want... I mean its your own trucking choice :P.

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Dude: Did you fart? Girl: No Dude: Oh I'm sorry because you blew me away

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Girl: Hi honey, wanna see a magic trick? Boy: Sure, why not? Girl -POOF- YOU'RE SINGLE!

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Husband: Honey, I heard that when you die, you come back as a different creature! Wife: Really!? I want to come back as a cow!! Husband: You're obviously not listening.

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Online Desperate Asians.com Man: Wow you are a cute asian girl! Where are you from? Girl: Thanks my name Aoi is I am from Japan, you look like nice older man! Man: Japan? Awesome! Remember when we nuked the hell out of your country? Happy days! SLAP A JAP! *Connection discontinued* Man: Eh really sorry, I just get nervous when I meet girls especially the cutest ones... Man: hello?

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I put the STD in STuD all i need is U!

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did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

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I think I shit myself

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I may have never f*cked a 10 before, but I did f*ck five 2's.

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You know, I had a great pickup line, but I just forgot it.

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While I am certain that the police consider you a person of interest, I assure you I do not.

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Guy: Is it hot in here or did i just break the ice? Girl: No, it was your weight.

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Charmeleon is Red, Squirtle is Blue, If you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you.

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Was your dad a thief? Because he's in jail

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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