Online Desperate Asians.com Man: Wow you are a cute asian girl! Where are you from? Girl: Thanks my name Aoi is I am from Japan, you look like nice older man! Man: Japan? Awesome! Remember when we nuked the hell out of your country? Happy days! SLAP A JAP! *Connection discontinued* Man: Eh really sorry, I just get nervous when I meet girls especially the cutest ones... Man: hello?

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will you marry me

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free candy....

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I think I shit myself

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I have a twin bed...we should have a threesome;)))

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Husband: Honey, I heard that when you die, you come back as a different creature! Wife: Really!? I want to come back as a cow!! Husband: You're obviously not listening.

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there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

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Man: Honestly! I am just desperate, and besides you are damn hot! Woman: Lets go to your place ;) Moral: This works, the anti-part is that no one will believe me nor try it themselves... Incredible how the easiest way is the least used...

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Roses are red, violets are blue. When I take a shit I think about you bitch *flushes the toilet*

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Are you from Jamaica because I'm from Jamaica and I think I recognize you? Your ugly as hell by the way.

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Guy: Da da da da da! I'm loving it. (looks at girl's crotch)

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Yo wazzup hoes? You knew black guys have the biggest dicks ever? ;) Uh, so what? You are white. Oh... yeah... Moral: Damn wiggers.

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Was your dad a thief? Because he's in jail

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And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Guy -Are you from Tenessee? Girl -No. guy -oh, because you looked kinda southern.

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What happens when a drunk swedish man prank calls 911 from a local bar? The ambulance comes

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I may have never f*cked a 10 before, but I did f*ck five 2's.

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Are your legs tired? cuz ive got a raging boner and need to get rid of it

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You belong in heaven. So make sure you say hi to God for me.

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Monday went by and he didn't see her Tuesday was the same Wednesday came and the swelling had finally gone down for him to make his wife out

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Criminals are even more smarter these days My wife woke me up in the middle of the night and said that there were burglars downstairs so I went quietly looking for them when I realised I'm not married

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Why are you crying? I have to walk out these woods alone!

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Man: Are you a beach? Cause I'm sure there's a lot of crabs crawling around down there

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!