Man: Would you like to dance? Woman: Hell No! Man: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said - You look fat in those pants!

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He: You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She: You are so handsome when you keep your mouth shut.

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Girls hate me, they always discuss about how they regret fucking with me over and over again. Moral: Thumb me down, I know ya love me.

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Boy : Gurle: hi

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Monday went by and he didn't see her Tuesday was the same Wednesday came and the swelling had finally gone down for him to make his wife out

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You stole my heart..... Don't worry, i have three more back home in my freezer.

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I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

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What happens when a drunk swedish man prank calls 911 from a local bar? The ambulance comes

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Actor walks in street... Woman: HEY ITS YOU! THE GUY THAT PLAYED GANDALF THE GAY!... Uh I mean Gandalf the GRAY! Actor: WRONG WOMAN! I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNETISM! Moral: Please take no insult Esteemed Mr.Ian McKellen you are a fantastic actor... as for the rest of you, feel free to feel as insulted as you want... I mean its your own trucking choice :P.

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At a bar (for originality`s sake :P) Man: Hello would you want to come home with me and uckucukucekcuah cough... AAAAAARRrghhhhhhhhhhhhhh (dies of heart attack) Woman: Wow that was an original line, ok ill come home with you... err... hello... uh... is everything okay? Moral: Despite this "joke" death is rarely a good pickup line.

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

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Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

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Eat me, I'm organic!

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there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

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http://pirater-gratuit.fr hacker un compte fb

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-Hey, what's your sign? -I don't know, but yours must be Cancer.

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Why are you crying? I have to walk out these woods alone!

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Guy: Da da da da da! I'm loving it. (looks at girl's crotch)

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Was your dad a thief? Because he's in jail

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- How 'bout we go to your place and take a shower together? - I think my husband and little baby would get a kick out of that!

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Male: Want to hear a story about my d--k? Nevermind, it's too long. Female: Want to hear a story about my vagina? Nevermind, you won't get it.

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Guy -Are you from Tenessee? Girl -No. guy -oh, because you looked kinda southern.

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Him - Would you like to dance? Her - NO! Him - I'm sorry. I think you misunderstood me. I said, "You look fat in those pants."

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Man: I bet you havent seen a really big dick before ;) ;) Woman: No... but I have seen yours... The man proceeds to stare at the floor and leaves in shame...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!