I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

-I'm addicted to yes, and I'm allergic to no. So what's it gonna be? -I'll start dialing 911 for you now.

- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?

- Your body is like a temple. - Sorry, there are no services today.

Male: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Female: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore

-Did it hurt -What when i fell from heaven? -No when you fell from the ugly tree and hit every single branch on the way down

Those must be space pants, because your ass is out of this world That must be a donkeys tongue, because its making an ass out of you.

Your skin would make a nice coat.

- Haven't we met before? - Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.

The word of the day is 'legs'. Wanna come to my place and spread the word?

-If I saw you naked, I'd die happy. -If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

-Baby, do you know karate? Your body is kickin'! -I do actually. Would your crotch like a demonstration?

- I can tell that you want me. - Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave.

Your body would look good in my trunk.

Hey baby, wanna make $50?

-Does beauty run in your family? -It obviously doesn't in yours!

-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you.

- I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true. - First wish: don't speak ever again.

Did the lord take the thunder from the skies, and put it in your thighs?

Hey, we have coresponding genetailia, we should converge in sexual intercourse.

- You must be a parking ticket cause you have fine written all over you - You must be a wellfare check then.

"Don't scream"

You're place or mine? Both, you go to yours and I go to mine.

I have no gag reflex.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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