- I can make your bed rock. - Oh yeah? An earthquake can too..

Man: Do you sleep on your stomach? Woman: No... Man: Can I?

BOY-i love you GIRL-(sneezes) sorry im allergic to bullshit

That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

Hey baby me you CHOIN CHOIN under the moonlight..

You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

Do you work at Subway? Cuz you just gave me a footlong

M: Wanna play dynamite? W: what's that? M: I lie on my back and you blow the sh** out of me.

Are your parents retarded? Because you sure are special.

if i see you naked i'll die happy Well if i see you naked i'l die instandly

Man - Hey you're kinda pretty! Woman - Um thanks... Man - Whoa slow down! I said kinda.

if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

"Hey baby, how do you like your eggs in the morning?" "Unfertilized."

If I had chloroform and a rag, you'd be waking up in a closet tomorrow.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun get in the van

- Hey good looking, where've I seen you before? - I'm one of the nurses at the plastic surgery department. Want another visit?

-Because you are not very attractive I figure you have low self-esteem. I will prey on your poor self-image for short-term sexual gratification. Also, you are really drunk. -OK.

Drink this!

Do you know karate... 'Cause I wanna know if you can fight back!

Hey baby, you make me wanna get a job.

I may not be the best looking guy in the room, but I'm the only one talking to you.

You know how I know we're going to have sex, tonight? I'm bigger than you.

Girl, you must be a parking ticket. Because you got 'Please pay within 30 days. Failure to do so you will face prosecution at the local court.' written all over you.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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