- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: sigh Did what hurt? (Expecting him to say "When you fell from heaven") Boy: When you broke through the earths crust, ascending from hell.

Hello im a thief and I'm here to steal your purse

Him - Would you like to dance? Her - NO! Him - I'm sorry. I think you misunderstood me. I said, "You look fat in those pants."

Every breath you take Every move you make Every bond you break Every step you take I'll be watching you Every single day Every word you say Every game you play Every night you stay I'll be watching you

Male: It's super hard and long. Female: I have always been under the impression that the GED is relatively simple.

Man : Wanna go to my house tonight? Woman : I'm not sure if a rock can fit 2 people inside.

Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

Hey I used to be a man, but I'm pretty horny.

Man: Wanna go to my home and have sex? Woman: Well... OK! Man: Wow you are easy!... wait! Where are you going? COME BACK! Moral: They are not easy, they just like a man with balls... and you where obviously not one of them... LAME OVER.

-Your the hottest girl i have ever met -I'm a man

Guy -Are you from Tenessee? Girl -No. guy -oh, because you looked kinda southern.

why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

Is that a ladder in your tights or are you just a cheap whore?!

How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

Man: I bet you havent seen a really big dick before ;) ;) Woman: No... but I have seen yours... The man proceeds to stare at the floor and leaves in shame...

Man: Would you like to dance? Woman: Hell No! Man: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said - You look fat in those pants!

I have never dated a horse-faced woman before :)

-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

Guy : your looking well! Girl: awh thanks Guy: You must have shaved this morning.....waaaaaay

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *sigh* Did what hurt? (Expecting him to say "When you fell from heaven") Boy: When you broke through the earths crust, ascending from hell.