Boy- Did it hurt when you fell- Girl- From heaven?!? AWWW <3 Boy- No the whore tree when you banged every guy on the way down.

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Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

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Male: It's super hard and long. Female: I have always been under the impression that the GED is relatively simple.

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Boy: does your face hurt Girl: No. Why Boy Because it sure is hurting me

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If your happy and you know it clap your hands!! What if I lost my hands in Nam while I was singing this song and a plane killed my friend causing me to ct off both of my hands?

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Man: I will make the rape on you now woman! Woman: Wow great Borat imitation bravo! Man: Borat who? *draws gun* Moral: Pretty immoral

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B: Hey C do you wanna go out with me? C: Sorry B I only go out with guy's who come after me

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Man: Well I usually do not bang women your uh... particular size, I mean you are a bit too big for me and um... I got standards... nothing personal but... I uh.. well ok lets try... I guess I stick it here and... Man2: HEY what the hell are you doing to my trailer you drunk bastard! Moral: Standards... we all have it.... just not that much of it...

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Man: Would you like to dance? Woman: Hell No! Man: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said - You look fat in those pants!

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And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

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why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

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Man and woman in bed, as the man looks troubled: Woman: Hey you are not in the mood? Whats wrong? Man looking down his pants: SNAKE! ANSWER ME! SNAKE WHATS WRONG? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKEEEEEEEEEEE! Woman: We arent gonna have sex huh? Man looks down pants again: Nuh huh... game over girl... game over...

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Boy : Gurle: hi

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Man: Put your face over my fist as I say shinku Woman: Huh? Ok whatever.... SHOOOOOOOOOORYUKEEEEEEN!

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Guy: Have you ever seen a rhinoceros? Girl:No. Why? Guy: So you don't have a mirror in your house?

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girl - leave! boy - no girl - leave now! boy - i cant girl - why boy - i broke my foot girl - oh

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there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

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I just killed my wife. What should I do?

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For you that think your family are too overprotective when it comes to sex, this was my story as a teenager. Mom: Hi guys! Me and ladyfriend: Hi mom! This is my ladyfriend: (insert your name if you are female) Dad: Woho! Good catch son! *claps me on shoulder* Mom: Dont worry, you guys just go right up and "study" eh ;) eh ;) and we are gonna put the music REALLY LOUD down here! And there is no need to be ashamed of stains nor anything. Dad: No we understand ;) ;) ;) Girl: Uh... you invited me just to study right? Me: Believe it or not I did... Dad: Yeah you two young ones go study! Remember condom though! ;) Girl: Axel! WTF?! *leaves* Me: Mom.. Dad! WTF!? I dont know anything about algebra (not even to this day, and I am almost 30) Dad: Algebra eh? ;) Next time give her a good "algebra". Me: Mom tell that moron tha... Mom: Relax son, I understand that you boys have desires and the next time you take her with you, you dont need to be ashamed or come up with excuse.. Me: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! Moral: To believe I learned most my ways by having ladyfriends... despite my parents... Mom and Dad overprotective? Good... trust me!

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Hey baby, I wanna solve your equation with longggg devision! ;)

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There must be an angel missing from Heaven, because I've got it tied up in my basement. (It keeps saying something about a fancy dress party, but I'm not falling for that one again; that's how Batman escaped.)

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Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

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Male: Man, if we were married... Female: What? We'd make beautiful children? Male: No, I'd leave your sorry, and ungrateful ass and make you stay with the kid.

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Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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