-how much do i have to pay you to **** me? -how much do i get for taking you back to the zoo?

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You look like a dog... Wana bone?

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I put the STD in Stud all I need is U

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Did you gain weight? Because I think your gravitational pull towards me just increased.

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Are you an angel that fell from heaven? If you are, can I take a picture of you as proof that supernatural beings exist?

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I may have never f*cked a 10 before, but I did f*ck five 2's.

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A long time ago I had a vision of someone like you. I was in a psych ward, wearing a straight jacket. Would you like some blended cheese?

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Lady: Is your name REAAAAAAAAALLY Moral? Moral: Stupid big titted bimbo... seems im getting laid tonight...just like I was today, and by midday and... yeah lie.. I mean brag a lot I do not have sex THAT many times a day... okay I lied again... Anyway vote me for president at least I am honest... well actually that was a lie but...

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-I know you want to ask me out. I am free anytime. -Ok, then go out.

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- If you were a booger I'd pick you first - If you were a booger I'd throw you away...

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It rubs the lotion onto it's skin

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Hey gurl, you smell like tape!

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you in between F and CK.

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So I caught my sister masturbating the other day, it was like lol hahaha you filthy bitch! Then she was like DONT TELL ANYBODY PLEASE I WILL BUY YOU THOSE BOXING GLOVES YOU WANTED SO MUCH! PLEASE! And I was like, NUHUUUH! The bed is full of piss and I totally got this on my cellphone, so you gonna pull up your panti... Oh you still looking for them LOL! Yeah, that was the subject I brought up at a bar... Sober, unless Redbull counts as drunk... Anti Pickupline as FUCK! Players Dont Use RedBull -Richard Nixon or whatever.

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male: hey i like you can i have your number female: what number? male: your pin number i want your money

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Do you have an STD? No. DO you want one??

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Man with huge arms and HUGE muscles enters a... pub! (for variety`s sake) "Hey you like fisting!" Woman: Yeah kinda.. I mean HOLY SHIT NO! I DONT PLEASE STOP NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH! Moral: Get a room you two! (a moral man original)

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Is your father a gardener? -No, why? ..Because I was wondering what a cactus like you doing in a place like this.

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You allergic to semen?

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He:*walks over* She: What is it now? He:*Unzips fly.* She : OH DEAR CHRIST NO

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Why don't you slip into something more comfortable? Like a coma?

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Hey babe, how about my mom drives us to the comic book store in her Civic? I got a carseat with seat belts for two.

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Did you just fart? 'cos you blew me away

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Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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