Guy: Happy Birthday Girl: Huh? Guy: You're gonna get raped

Hello my name is Pogo. Would you like to jump on my stick?

He:*walks over* She: What is it now? He:*Unzips fly.* She : OH DEAR CHRIST NO

On your mark, get set, suck my dick.

HE ; " MY NAME'S BOND, JAMES BOND" SHE;" MY NAME'S ****, **** OFF!"

At a cemetery: Girl: This place is so creepy at night... I should have left sooner... Man: RAWRGH! BRAAAAAAAAAAINS!!!!!!! Girl: EEEEEEEEEEEEK! (runs away) Man *takes off makeup and fake blood* Man; Well, I guess that did not work... Moral: If they dont like you while you are alive, there are always un-dead options...

-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

Hey babe, where've you been all my life. Well let's see, I used to live up north in Newcastle then I moved to Liverpool and I'm just down here in London for one day on work.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blob fish are ugly and so are you.

M - wanna have some fun? F - No! M - 0k, i have no choice but to rape you!

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

"OMG A SAMSUNG!" Lol, thats cool man, as for the car, the engine is shiny and flawless, (you know for a fiat) and I have not used it since I you know "bought it" as in won it from my ex while playing poker? Id give it back to her if she was not such a bitch. Honestly dude, its a fiat, and that piece of shit you call a car, I mean man, we have been towed from the free way like six times already? XD And that is just the few times I want to sit in that piece of shit XD I mean the seats pop off and there is "custom space to transport marijuana there man XD" I seriously hope you bought it that way, because stoners aint my friends. Seriously dude, the Fiat (aka "car") is yours, you know that you are bankrupt because you keep trying to fix that piece of shit on wheels of yours XD, and hey, surprise kiddo, I renewed the engine, so its new and shiny, and free, and fuck if not only the engine itself is worth ten more times than... A billion of those pieces of shit you drive XD No seriously, you know me, Im The Hannibal, I am the beast but I like it classy, and its pretty embarrassing sitting on that piece of shit you call for a car. I know we are from different worlds pal, but take it, just gave myself a bonus at work (legal of course) but I got to say it... "A SAMSUNG OMG" XD And yeah, I know you been eyeballing that "car" aka Fiat, its yours whenever you want it, just tell people I am leasing it to you (I mean it I really do, thats my only condition) Moral: "I DRIVE PIECES OF SHIT FOR BREAKFAST!" PROTIP FOR GETTING ANYWHERE IN YOUR CAR: Put it The opposite way, and have the towing car tow you TOWARDS the place you want to get to XD (hey, how many times you been towed JUST from the freeway? I mean I hate hunting, but do you really use that shit in the Forrest too? Answer here, be real, and come get your car.

Can I have your number? -I don't have one.

At a bar: Man: Hi according to horsehead network I am the third most useless "invention" in the world! Moral: See what I did there? No? Then go see the pointless inventions section :P

This doesn't have to be a rape.

Haven't we met somewheer before? Yes, son.

- Do you wanna play the rape game? - NO! - That's the spirit!

Your face is like mace, every time i see if i get blinded

-Hey baby, what's yo sign? - U Turn

I'm a bad lover. I once caught a peeping tom booing me.-Rodney Dangerfield

I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

Female=You Son of a B*tch! Male=Hi Mum!

Man - "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" Woman - "Yes it does."

Boy: Do u have a pen? Girl: Yeah, here Boy: Umm..its out of ink Girl: What? Boy: It doesn't work Girl: R u sure? Boy: Don't believe me? Fine, u try it... Go on, write your cell phone number right here....

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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