Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together Woman: What does ui spell?

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Do you work at Subway, because you're giving me a footlong. No actually, I once had a job at a local Quizno's Sub Shop. However a tragic fire killed several employees and customers at this very location. I survived, but lost have permanent Third-Degree burns across my body. My life is ruined, prick.

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Hey baby i have a 3 inch penis but i produce two galons of semen everytime i cum...

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Hey girl, you a single mom I heard, I love that. Really? :D SURE! Hey just between us, how sexy are your kids on a scale from one to over nine thousand? Moral: Watch out ladies, I can only take care of so many of you... (you have kids? Meh, get lost,nothing personal, just you know... your kid)

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With the escalating price of rohypnol, most girls aren't worth my attention.

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-Darling, I will never stop pursuing you. Even from the ends of the earth, I will follow you wherever you go. Really, I love you that much. -"Honey", I will call the police and have you thrown in jail for stalking me. Really, I hate you that much.

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If you and I were squirrels, I'd bust a nut in that hole.

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jack sanders

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Man: Hey, I've been kinda watching you through the night and I'd really be mad if I didn't talk to you tonight. So um, do you want to grab a bite to eat sometime or something? Woman: I'm married but you seem like a nice guy so yea... yea, I'd like that alot.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with glue? My d***

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Damn girl did you just come from the dump? Cause you smell like shit.

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Im gonna rape you..

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Boy: So...Um...How's life? Girl: Great, until you came along.

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him: your like the sun in the morning. her: that so sweet! him: Your very big and i can even stare at you for more then 2 secondes.

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Your father must have been a theif, because you look like a pikiey

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Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

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Are you a dementor? Cause you take my breath away.

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The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

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does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Wanna go back to my place and watch some CarVideos?

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did you fall from heaven, cause i forgot my library card.

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boy: my dick is 10 inches girl: mine's too

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guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

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Okay, I lied, the one below actually kinda works, people get impressed, it is quite the accomplishment you know... But since I am gonna get married soon I don't pick up as much as I should anyways. Moral: Man

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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