Hello children! :D

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It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

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boy: hey wanna hang out some time?! girl: O MY GOD! r u hannah montanna?!

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He- You've got something on your ass. She- What? He- Oh never mind, it's just a period stain.

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If we were confronted, by a vicious man-eating bear with chain-saws for hands and fangs, holding a hammer; than I would sincerley hope you wouldn't be harmed because you're pretty.

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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I am Lucifer, my color is blue I already got my queen TO HELL WITH YOU! Moral: Know my name and fear it, I am now and forever.

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

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your beauty surpasses that of the greek goddess aphrodite.

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Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

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One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door. Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen doughnuts waiting for him at his door. Then a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Member of Parliament was very happy and left the shop. The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Members of Parliament lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.

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do you like cows? no! i am a cow! oh!

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your so beautiful im blinded! aww really?! no. i was kidding. im just blind.

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Damn, girl, you're hot... You look just like my mom.

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Guy: You look two times as beautiful with makup on. Girl: Really? I think you would too.

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-Good thing I brought my library card, 'cause I'm checking you out! -What a shame, it's expired.

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guy: r u from mcdonalds, coz im luvin it :D Girl: r u from burger king coz ur fat :L

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- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?

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whats up ho

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Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

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do you work at subway? 'cause you give me foot long. i'll do you a favour and cut it up

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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