Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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Is your dad a terrorist?? 'Cause you're a sex bomb.

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, so shove it up your A$$.

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your boobs are bigger than my nose

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

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"Hey, I have the feeling i've seen you before somewhere..." "Well, could be, I used to be a porn actress.

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You dont need makeup, plastic surgery is really cheap nowadays!

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Chick:- Don't worry, we all get nervous when we meet people. My brother: yeah, but my buttcrack gets sweaty & smelly when i get nervous!

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Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

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Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

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I couldn't help but notice you from the other side of the bar. You look way better from over there.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm but I accidentally gave her the glue stick, she is still not talking to me.

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A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

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Is it hot in here or are you just suffocating me in this relationship

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Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

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Do you work at Subway, because you're giving me a footlong. No actually, I once had a job at a local Quizno's Sub Shop. However a tragic fire killed several employees and customers at this very location. I survived, but lost have permanent Third-Degree burns across my body. My life is ruined, prick.

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I like your eyes. My eyes don't like you.

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- you come here often? -i used to until you came here

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-I love you.

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Man: Hey you female? Cuz I am a horny man and... *door slams*

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"Can I buy you a drink or do I have to have sex with you first?"

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!