-Wanna go to my place? -Actually, I was gonna ask you the same question. -Really? Where do you live? -In a sexual harassment class.

Q: How did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

HE: You must have some hot buns. SHE: Yeah? HE: Cause you got a real butterface to go with them.

You're so hot that if someone threw a grenade at you, I'd probably throw it back because falling on it sounds like a really dumb idea.

-I heard you broke up :). -Yes, cookies to put in my ice cream!

wanna go halves on a b*stard?

Hey baby, i like your hair -girl takes off wig

men: Do you ride horses, because I'd let you ride me all night!

Boy: Do u have a pen? Girl: Yeah, here Boy: Umm..its out of ink Girl: What? Boy: It doesn't work Girl: R u sure? Boy: Don't believe me? Fine, u try it... Go on, write your cell phone number right here....

-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

Ugly begins with U. But awesome ends with ME.

guy: do you like sea food? girl: hell yes, I got crabs, would you like some

M: You make me wanna be a terrorist! W: Why? M: I so wanna blow on you right now...

Superman enters a bar: Superman: Ladies... who wants to try out my newly developed "super orgasmi-power"? Women: Did you not die? Superman: Uh no... it was just a uh... healing coma... *All the women fall into a "healing coma* Superman: *scratches head* Well... I kinda asked for this... Moral:*Healing coma*

"Can I buy you a drink or do I have to have sex with you first?"

-ILY -Aw. Spell it out it will make it more special. -I'm Leaving You

Hey, you want a ride?

i wanna see your dick? i cant seem to find it...... sorry

Hey gorgeous what are you drinking? Cyanide.

What happens when a drunk swedish man prank calls 911 from a local bar? The ambulance comes

you look like my mother

Do you want to dance No I suppose a blow job is out of the question then

Classic story time: Shit that happens out there. Girl: Omg that guy called you a douche! Go punch him! Or else my respect for you is gone. Man: Hey, you called me a douche right? Well... FALCOWN PAWNCH! Girl: Omg you are so violent, my respect for you is gone. Moral: Really, I am speechless... Its a lose/lose situation.

all in all it was a good orgy

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!