Roses are red Violets are gold Get on your knees And do what your told

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-Hey comon baby dont be shy give me a little BlowJob -sorry im alergic to peanuts....

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For the males that do not know what I mean with "woman screams" comment below... well HAHAHAHAHAH LOSERS LOOOOOOOOOOOSEEEEEEEEERS! Moral: Read a book about females more interesting parts one day you lazy bastard... as for the girls... I am not talking about anything bad nor dirty... just 12 hour orgasms and such nice things... WHAT? YOU GONNA TELL ME THAT IS HORRIBLE? Well in that case you dont know what you are missing... and you wont ever know.... Ps: Can you believe I am actually trying to get thumbs downs but keep getting upped? Thanks for accepting my ever growing controversial nature, lets keep it that way and soon moral man will uh... receive a medal for uh... well a small keychain for... uh... you know what? Never mind.

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Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

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Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

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Baby if you were homework, I would do you all the time

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man-hey baby you wanna go somewhere girl-no thanks hells over there

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So when' the baby due?

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guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

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What happens when a drunk swedish man prank calls 911 from a local bar? The ambulance comes

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Guy: Da da da da da! I'm loving it. (looks at girl's crotch)

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"You'll do."

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Man: You got such beautiful eyes... they are so round and sensual, so full of life and bouncy and... Woman: Those are not my eyes! Man: TITS! I meant TITS! Damn I thought I had screwed up my chance to pound you`re ass for a second there... PHEW!

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Man: I would kill anyone at anytime for a kiss from you. Woman: Kill yourself now.

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That outfit looks great on you.. .. It would look even better crumpled up in a pile in an evidence bag

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Hi! Do you like fat guys with no money?

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Hey baby you looking for a stud? Cuz I've got the STD and all I need now is U

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are you on fire?

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Her: Guess what? Him: What? Her Yo Mama! Him: Is she that slut i did last night?

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My friend and I flipped a coin to see who will ask you out and I won.

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I don't have a library card but do you mind if I check you out?

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In a loud bar: Man: Do you enjoy gRape? Woman: HOW DARE YOU YOU PERVERT! Man: Uh... how about raisins then... Woman: Err... can you repeat that first question again... Moral: I would but I would have to bypass the censorship somehow...

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Man: hey... you seem pretty paralytic and unable to move in that wheelchair ;) Woman: uh oh...well actually I can move a bit... Man: Good because I do not wanna do ALL the thrusting back and forth... Woman: Bu.. but... I... I do not want to... Man: Well if you do not want sex, then just run away... ;) FATALITY... FLAWLESS VICTORY... RAPEALITY!

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I wouldn't.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!