- Anti-Pickup Line

Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who only wants to cuddle.

Hey baby, my name is Richard Gozinia. But my friends call me Dick. Dick Gozinia.

Sexual harassment, it can be a touchy subject.

I may not be the best looking guy in the room, but I'm the only one talking to you.

-How did your date go last night? -It was going alright but then I started crying uncontrollably. -Nervous habit? -Pepper spray.

I hope you know CPR, because you so ugly you take my breath away

Glass Basketball

I hope you're not a vegetarian.... because my dick is made of meat.

Are those space pants? Because no one is going to hear you scream later.

Guy : your looking well! Girl: awh thanks Guy: You must have shaved this morning.....waaaaaay

Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

SEE WHAT’S UP, DOWN UNDER.

It's not Rape* If you yell surprise.

guy: ermm...i like blondes ;) ima blonde too...we r a perfect dumb blonde match!!!! girl: yeah but im the dumb one in this situation. and have u taken a look in the mirror lately?!?! guy: yeah...well...uhh...maybe.........no not really... girl: well first of all you got pimples the size of mars, you have cross-eyes, you nose is bigger than squidwards nose, and let me see ur d!ck...now!!!! guy: oooh getting right to the point!!! i like it unzips his pants and pulls out his nub girl: uhh well u aint got no point, it looks like ur point just broke... guy: well midgets cant help it!!!!!!!!! dont judge my falses!!!!!! girl: okayy...besides theres wayyy too much to judge...no point...ur a complete waste of my timee!!!!!!!! now go watch porn and see if it grows a little bigger than his little nub u got.

-You wanna get laid tonight? -You wanna never have sex again?

Girlfriend: you are much more naive when you are naked, and a small penis, no hair and are 23 years old

Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down

How much does a whales weigh? How much? Just enough to make you look skinny.

Are u in the army cause u make my private stand at attention.

your almost as hot as my wife

Girl walks into restaurant - Hi, are you sap666 from the dating site? - I'm going to kill your family! Since then, socially awkward penguin never dated anymore....

Man: Hello! Mishimush! This is a Mister Borat eh? I would like to make the sexy time with you now woman... Eh can I make the rape on you? I will not make much crushings on you if you do not bite okay? Girl: WOW! SURE! Man: Sigh... I... (takes of wig and mustachio) I am actually Sasha Baron Cohen and this is just a hidden camera scene for my movie an.. Girl: WHO THE HELL ARE YOU YOU UGLY BASTARD! GET LOST! Man: DAMN! But its me the same guy and I think I just fell in love with you an... Girl: GET OUT YOU PERVERT! 10 minutes later: Man: Hello there oh honey, this is da berlinen wassenflass Bhruno and I would like you to help me make me the hetrosexal man for das werbungen of my movie star eh? Girl: .( Sigh... I miss that Borat guy... Man: But its me! I am Both Borat and Bruno and... Girl: YOU AGAIN?! GET LOST ASSHOLE! Man: Damn... something just went very very wrong here did it not? Borat: Hello the mister Baron eh? Mishimush! I am the making movie of Crushings of America! And this is my very Manly Man Bruno! Bruno: Hello hot stuff! Cohens! Me and Borat would like to make the very manly thing with you in a threycantzen of tree peepols! Borat: EH YES! We make bang bang in the anoos together with man man and man so no gays make us they slaves! Director: Is something wrong Mr.Cohen? Man: Uh... I think I need to see a shrink for a while after this experience...

So you want tonight to be consensual or not?

Girl- Hey ily Boy- say it it just makes it that much better ;) Girl- I'm leaving you

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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