Guy for a girl with a dog: -Does the dog have a cell phone? -Why? is your mom in heat?

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Tenth year anniversary female edition: Love, for each day my love grows stronger for you. Too bad honey, I married a old man and was hoping you would be dead by now. Oh! What a shock! Do you really mean that? Sigh... No, whispers: I was just hoping that would give you a stroke that's all) What was that last thing you said? Nothing "dear" Moral: Cyanide, just mash the seeds of six apples, use a syringe and presto! Dead family!

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Shorts and pants compilation: Hey you a cheap prostitute or just out of my league? Hey mom I just watched some more hentai today and wonder if you would... Why are you screaming? Its just me naked with a boner! According to hentai its completely natural! I mean I am getting to do you when I turn eighteen right? No? You are a horrible mother! I am so telling dad you wont give it up! Bitch, you like men that beat you up while fucking you? You do? Oh, my! This is like too freaky too me! *runs out girlie screaming* Dad, I watched some other hentai today and, I wonder if you... Moral: *Pants*, there you go.

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Hey baby, have you ever been to Uranus? No? Well I am about to.

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I may have never f*cked a 10 before, but I did f*ck five 2's.

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Girl: Do you know any good movies? Boy: Snakes on a plane Girl: Whats it about? Boy: It's about Horses.. on a boat.

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Hey, nice shoes..... Wanna F***?

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After hearing a pickup line: -I like your approach, now let's see your departure.

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"Hey baby, how do you like your eggs in the morning?" "Unfertilized."

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-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

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Can I have your number? -I don't have one.

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- I can tell that you want me. - Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave.

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Hey baby, you make me wanna get a job.

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-If you are looking at a girl and she says What are you looking at? -I thought you were good looking, but I was mistaken.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun get in the van

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I DROPPED MY LAPTOP IN THE RIVER IT WAS ADELE ROLLING IN THE DEEP ( A DELL ROLLING IN THE DEEP)

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A blond, a brunette and a black haired girl are all stuck on an island....stupid women.

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- you come here often? -i used to until you came here

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Man: Would you like to dance? Woman: Hell No! Man: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said - You look fat in those pants!

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The word of today is "leg's",no whom are i kidding, bird is the word!

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M: Woah I am drunk baby... But I gotta say... you`re the hottest bitch in town! B: Bark bark!

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—do you believe in love at first sight or shall I come back again? —no, and I think you shall not come back ever.

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Here, flowers for a pretty lady. These arent flowers they are leaves. Well you arent a pretty lady so hah!

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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