You know, I had a great pickup line, but I just forgot it.

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You're like chocolate pudding. You look like crap.

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Man: Your red thumbs cannot hurt me! Im the MoralmanBitch! *Throws couch at woman* WHOAAAAAAAAAARGH!* Woman: *dead* Man:Hey wake up bitch! HEY! I said wake up or ill have my way with you!... Moral got jugs! Moral: Works every time

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Would you like to be the lone mother of my children?

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You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

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Hey I used to be a man, but I'm pretty horny.

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-How much does a polar bear weigh? -It is impossible to know the exact weight of a polar bear where no scale or bear are present.

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Man enters bar: Man: is there any... I mean ANY woman that would not instantly reject me here? If there is, I would like her... or in worst case scenario, HIM that she/he is very special to me and has the most beautiful eyes ever... THANK YOU

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Young man: Hey I have watched a lot of Hentai lately so I wondered if you wanna come home and have hardcore sex and... Mature woman: HOW CAN YOU SAY SUCH A THING! IM YOUR MOTHER! Young man: As I said mom... I have watched a lot of Hentai lately so... Moral: Hentai keeping families together since forever...

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Man: I bet you havent seen a really big dick before ;) ;) Woman: No... but I have seen yours... The man proceeds to stare at the floor and leaves in shame...

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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WHEN I ACTUALLY DIE SOME PEOPLE ARE GOING TO GET REALLY HAUNTED. Originally Posted at: Collection of Funny WhatsApp Status

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I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, so shove it up your A$$.

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-You know I've always had a thing for blondes -thats funny, i've always had a thing for girls

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whats up ho

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I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were going out and I was like O Mg.

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good thing i got my library card cuz im checking you out. i hate people who have library cards.

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Was your dad a thief? Because he's in jail

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Hey, can I have your number? No, I'm not a Jew.

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Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

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Guy: Is it hot in here or did i just break the ice? Girl: No, it was your weight.

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-I'll do anything,no matter how kinky it is if you can say it in three words. -Clean my house.

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Where have you been all my life?! Said the 78 year old alzheimers patient to his teary eyed wife of 50 years.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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