man: you look like my favorite girl. Girl: is that so? Man: yupp, best dog i ever had.

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"Is this seat free?" "Yes, and if you sit on it, this seat will be free too"

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- I'd go to the end of the world for you - Good,Stay There

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Your face is like mace, every time i see if i get blinded

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My dog just died so now you're my only Bitch.

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Have you met Ted?

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-Your father must be an alien because your out of this world -More like out of your league

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He: How do you like your eggs in the morning? She: Unfertilised!

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- I think i lost my number, can i have yours? - I think i lost my number too.

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-Hey baby, what's yo sign? - U Turn

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"Hmm...you'll do."

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If your right leg was Thanksgiving and your left leg was Christmas, could i come between the holidays?

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knock knock. whos there. interupting cow. inter... mooo!

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Man: Yeah I have done it with thousands of women all around the world... THOUSANDS! Woman: Okay... then ill come home with you, I want an experienced man to be my first... At his house: Woman: I AM SCARED! Will it hurt? Its my first time and... Man: I dunno! I am scared as Its my first time too! :( Moral: A man whose is scared of sex... pfffffff!

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Your butt is so big that I would propably lose intrest during sex.

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roses are red violets are blue My dog gives me a bigger orgasm then you

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Man - How was your trip from heaven? Woman - Great... until now.

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I'm desperate, you'll do.

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I'm a bad lover. I once caught a peeping tom booing me.-Rodney Dangerfield

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Man: Hey you female? Cuz I am a horny man and... *door slams*

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If I said you had a beautiful body I'd be lying.

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I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

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Guy: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl: No, but it will hurt when I pepper spray you.

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adam burdass

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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