-Eeeeeeeey girl how much does a polar bear weigh? -An adult male weighs around 350–680 kg (770–1,500 lb),[4] while an adult female is about half that.

I DROPPED MY LAPTOP IN THE RIVER IT WAS ADELE ROLLING IN THE DEEP ( A DELL ROLLING IN THE DEEP)

I really should start saying "congratulations" instead of "are you keeping it?"

Man: Hey you look good enough to do Woman: Oh really because so does my 8 foot boyfriend. Man: ... Woman: Do you want me to pick him up from the gym?

What's the difference between a Jew and a boyscout? The boyscout returned from camp.

Guy: If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together Girl: If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put F and U together

I may not be the best looking guy in the room, but I'm the only one talking to you.

The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

M: Wanna play dynamite? W: what's that? M: I lie on my back and you blow the sh** out of me.

You know, you can't spell "stud" without STD and U

When I said bitch, I meant it as a compliment...

Hello my name is Pogo. Would you like to jump on my stick?

Hello little girl would you like some candy, yes? ;-)

Did it hurt? When I fell from Heaven? NO! WHen you were shot up from hell for stealing my pick up line!!!

Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

If i don't have sex in 30 seconds i'll have to kiss you

Man: Honey, I can't choose between watching golf or porn? Wife: Porn. You already know how to golf.

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *sigh* Did what hurt? (Expecting him to say "When you fell from heaven") Boy: When you broke through the earths crust, ascending from hell.

You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

If you go out with me there might be some smegma in it for you.

are you a brush because you just swept me off my feet

Male: Hey babe! Wanna come to my house for a party? Female: Sorry! Don't have my herpes shot!

Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

He: pick a number between 1 and 10 Her: 8 He: you lose take your top-off!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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