Mens most noob things to say during sex: "Thank you" "Do I really get all this for free?" "Sure you don't want me to pay you?" "MOTHER!" *crying* "You`re wet down there! Did you just pee yourself? DISGUSTING!!!" "I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!" "STOP SUCKING CUZ IM ABOUT TO CUM!!"

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Man: Hello there my name is... Woman: I wish you where water... Man: So you can swallow me? Hey not so fast baby! I dont like em fast. Woman: You did not let me finish! Man: Whatever, gotta go... Moral: Girls... women... you may be mysterious, but unlocking your secrets is my favorite pastime... I CHARRENGE YOU!... Then again I never liked women throwing themselves at me without me saying a word (not that it happens very often)¨ Ps: I see some other people have started to add "morals" to their stories, without success sadly, keep going kids, and people will always of course know who the real "Moral man is" because of the cheap nature of my fantastically silly and "dragged out of the ass" nature of my morals...

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-Did you fall from heaven? Because your an angel -No but did you? Because your face is fucked up!

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After hearing a pickup line: -I like your approach, now let's see your departure.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun get in the van

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Is Heaven missing an Angel? Because I have an erection.

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are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

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Man: Hey baby, I hear you are lesbian, that sounds really sexy! ;) Woman: Take the damn hint asshole! I am a lesbian! Man: Hey! Woah! Relax! I already know where you come from, say, are all girls in Lesbia this hostile? Moral: They are friendlier in south Lesbia...

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-Hey, baby, What's your sign? -Stop.

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- Haven't we met before? - Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.

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Hey Clarkson, you know about this pointless invention Named Nero The Moral man? Clarkson: No. Nero: No. Is this because horsehead network sucks? Clarkson: Yes. Nero: WTF AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE! Oh yeah I am fucking it away... Fuck me, every girl around me just ends up completely fucked.... ;)

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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-hey baby wanna get a drink? -no but i wanna get the heck away from you

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How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

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jack sanders

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Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who only wants to cuddle.

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MAN: hey babe, do think that mabye someday I and U will be next to each other in the alphebet? WOMAN: well N and O are already, sooo.....

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Man: I am willing to give my life for you. Woman: How about you fucking get one instead and rather seek me out then? Moral: M-M-M-Morale breaker!

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Hey I used to be a man, but I'm pretty horny.

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-don't sit on the table, people eat there! -don't sit on that chair, people sit there!

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Man, no im still waiting,need to get my kids, hope its fine son, okay punches, captain falcon, but you break my jaw, I wont even ask for you to pay the bill, ill expect it. Man, good times, honestly, i was not even drunk, I was high as shit, never again tho, they did not tell me it was "magic tobacco" until I started seeing numbers NUMBAS! Hey, mind if I come stay sometime? I mean we really miss you son, you always at the fuckhouse now. Just me and... Well the gang... Just like the twelve of us, tell me who you dont want to invite and ill bounce him out for you. Man dog, that chick I punched down was pretty as fuck, she would have been my wife... Anyway just fucking happy finally a real car dude! If she fucks you to death, you gonna go out young and a Legend among gods, let her keep on sucka! (just don forget bout my sis huh? She asks about you too fucking much already) Man, you got me typing almost as much as you dog, anyway is you know, in four hours allright? If not screw my kid, I need a car ill get him a cab.

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Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Hi girls... whos coming home with me? And please dont reject me because I am a rich man and rejection makes me throw thousand dollar bills at random.

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Woman: You've got the body of a god, too bad that it's Buddha... Man: You've got the face of a Princess, too bad that it's Diana.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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