I heard you were looking for a STUD, well I have an STD all I need is U

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Are you from Tennessee? Because we are both in Tennessee and I thought asking where you grew up would be a good way to get to know you better.

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boy - would you like to dance? girl - hell no! boy - I think you misunderstood me. I said you look fat in those pants. girl - That's why I said "Hell No!" girl - I'm trying to deny the fact that I look fat in my pants. boy - damnit! girl - Phew!

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-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you.

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-I'm addicted to yes, and I'm allergic to no. So what's it gonna be? -I'll start dialing 911 for you now.

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- Hey good looking, where've I seen you before? - I'm one of the nurses at the plastic surgery department. Want another visit?

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are you on fire?

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-Baby, do you know karate? Your body is kickin'! -I do actually. Would your crotch like a demonstration?

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- You must be a parking ticket cause you have fine written all over you - You must be a wellfare check then.

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You wanna have sex and get married?? Ok... Sorry.

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"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

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boy: my dick is 10 inches girl: mine's too

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Guy: You look like a suitable mate and I'd thoroughly enjoy engaging in rough, sweaty sex with you and your lady parts.

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You're so hot, you should wear a burkha over your face.

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Drink this!

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That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

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Damn, girl, you're hot... You look just like my mom.

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Are you from hogwarts, because I really want to put my basilisk into your chamber of secrets

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Man: Do you sleep on your stomach? Woman: No... Man: Can I?

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He- You've got something on your ass. She- What? He- Oh never mind, it's just a period stain.

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- You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -No, your mind is so small I can't even take a step in it!

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Lets play the Yes/No game the rules are you can only say yes or no once to the questions, No. 1 Are you beautiful?, No.2 Are you Lying?

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Tonight might be a convienient night for us to have some intercourse.

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Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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