- Anti-Pickup Line

-Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I'd be in prison.

I think I shit myself

Lol, lucky you that this piece of shit site worked so fast for you huh DAD? Fine, I need no essay on her ass, my firm (well where I work at the top of the foodchain lets be modest here) sponsors all Samsung phones, so seriously ill get you the most expensive one I can find (its free, ill just tell them I need an extra one for, calling, but just for you, if you tell anybody else, ill just slash your tires. Man, I hate HATE sounding nice because I am not, but you can have that damn Fiat something (black car) that I bought from my ex, you take that instead? You still owe me the cash, but the car is yours (I never use it, and its you know... Bad, but still ten thousand times better than your car. Moral: Me? I just cant bother using my wives phone in order to call myself and find my own damn phone, so if you read this, you are golden. Oh, and if you want that piece of shit car of yours (cant even tell the brand can you? Seriously tell me) then you can have the damn money, but no paintjob, that car is, and must look like the trash it is. AMEN? Jk, Fuck Amen. Finally, so you want one with Keyboard attachment or one with keyboard embedded into the screen? The ones with the keyboards are usually a bit more pricey, but man, some of them suck ass, still I can get you like the one I got for business (yeah we gotta use fucking Samsung phones it pays well though) And forget your damn car tires, XD Im laughing here, some could steal those dirty flat pieces of shit, and you would be driving without noticing shit my whigga XD.

Man: Oh.. girl you smell so nice... Girl: TRY ANOTHER LINE AND STOP LOOKING AT MY TlTS LOSER! Man: Uh... I am blind... Girl: Um...

-You wanna get laid tonight? -You wanna never have sex again?

-Did it hurt -What when i fell from heaven? -No when you fell from the ugly tree and hit every single branch on the way down

You like peanuts? Cause I like penis.

Tenth year anniversary female edition: Love, for each day my love grows stronger for you. Too bad honey, I married a old man and was hoping you would be dead by now. Oh! What a shock! Do you really mean that? Sigh... No, whispers: I was just hoping that would give you a stroke that's all) What was that last thing you said? Nothing "dear" Moral: Cyanide, just mash the seeds of six apples, use a syringe and presto! Dead family!

What's the difference between a duck? An orange

Guy: You look like a suitable mate and I'd thoroughly enjoy engaging in rough, sweaty sex with you and your lady parts.

Do you have sunburn, or are you always this hot? It's sunburn.

Me. Would you like me to get you a ring for valentines day? Girlfriend: Nothing would make me happier! So I got her nothing...

- hey ;) - hey, yourself. - if i wanted my comeback, i would've wiped it off your mom's face.

"Wow, you look so thin! Are you wearing a girdle?"

Girl, do you believe in love by first sight? Uh maybe... Okay, let me see if those titties of you are real or wonderbra or silicone or whatever... Moral: You are fantastic, you know who you remind me of? Myself ;)

Shorts and pants compilation: Hey you a cheap prostitute or just out of my league? Hey mom I just watched some more hentai today and wonder if you would... Why are you screaming? Its just me naked with a boner! According to hentai its completely natural! I mean I am getting to do you when I turn eighteen right? No? You are a horrible mother! I am so telling dad you wont give it up! Bitch, you like men that beat you up while fucking you? You do? Oh, my! This is like too freaky too me! runs out girlie screaming Dad, I watched some other hentai today and, I wonder if you... Moral: Pants, there you go.

Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

-Are you an angel? -Yeah...actually I am. I remember you-aren't you the guy that fell out of heaven? So THAT'S why your face is so screwed up.

- hey id like my order for you - ok we put extra punch with it these days

Guy - Do you want to go outside and play R-a-p-e? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

There's a reason why they call my penis the Bunker Buster.

Hey girl... U remind me of my pinkie toe.. Ur small cite and I'll probably bang u on the coffee table later

I'm jealous of every girl that hugs you, Because for that one second she held my entire world.

Hey you must be Jabba the slut from Starwars... why are you crying? Moral: Moral is half the battle

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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