Hey bitch wanna fuck! SURE! Nah you too sleasy. Moral: And the masters of the universe.

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Man enters bar and does a lot of magic tricks, all the prettiest women are extremely impressed: Girls: WOW! We would do anything to see more of that! Guy: Uh... damn I forgot what to do after this... Moral: Screw the game man, its a stupid book, just be your moronic self and someone will like you for the lovely disgusting moron that you are... by the way you lost the game :D

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the most beatiful woman I have ever seen, so could you move out the way please

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Penis. I got it

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-Hey, have we met before? -No, because I don't remember ever seeing a face that made me this nauseous.

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Girl: Are you a doctor? Because I think I have the flu. *sneeze*

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Man: Hey sexy, I think I have seen you many times before... Woman: Hmmm... I do not think I have seen you before... Man: Do you happen to be used to getting raped? Woman:...... Moral: yeah it was her :( Audience: BOOOOOOOOOO! Moral: I know :(

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Miss excuse me but... Moral: Admitt it fucker, you cant pick up a girl by apolgizing for whatever you are gonna do beforehand. GIMME FIVE! (red thumbs, red is the color of love or something)

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I may not be the best looking guy in the room, but I'm the only one talking to you.

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You know how I know we're going to have sex, tonight? I'm bigger than you.

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If I had chloroform and a rag, you'd be waking up in a closet tomorrow.

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BOY-i love you GIRL-(sneezes) sorry im allergic to bullshit

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You're so hot I'd do you sober.

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Are your parents retarded? Because you sure are special.

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Do you work at Subway? Cuz you just gave me a footlong

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Man: Do you sleep on your stomach? Woman: No... Man: Can I?

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Hey, we have coresponding genetailia, we should converge in sexual intercourse.

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-What`s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? -What`s it like being the biggest liar in the world?

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-What's your name sexy? -Taken!

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Tonight might be a convienient night for us to have some intercourse.

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-can i buy you a drink? i buy you a taxi?

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Did the lord take the thunder from the skies, and put it in your thighs?

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I have no gag reflex.

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Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!