roses are red, violets are blue, i have some money, how much are you?

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BOY-i love you GIRL-(sneezes) sorry im allergic to bullshit

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Q: How did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

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How'd you like to earn 14 dollars, the HARD way?

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Girls hate me, they always discuss about how they regret fucking with me over and over again. Moral: Thumb me down, I know ya love me.

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I have the smallest erected dick in town, if you don't believe me ask my mama!

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How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

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Are you an angel that fell from heaven? If you are, can I take a picture of you as proof that supernatural beings exist?

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MAN: You wanna know what's beautiful? Read the first word again. WOMAN: You wanna know what's desperate? Read the first word again!

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- You're a bombshell! - Too bad it ain't gonna BANG!

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good thing i got my library card cuz im checking you out. i hate people who have library cards.

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"How'd you get the black eye?" "I called Yolanda a two-bit whore." "What did she hit you with?" "A sack of quarters."

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-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

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I think I shit myself

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How much does a whales weigh? How much? Just enough to make you look skinny.

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did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

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You wanna go somewhere? Yeah, where? The Swingers Association.

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M- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? W- I'm an atheist.

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Man enters bar: Man: is there any... I mean ANY woman that would not instantly reject me here? If there is, I would like her... or in worst case scenario, HIM that she/he is very special to me and has the most beautiful eyes ever... THANK YOU

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him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

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When I said bitch, I meant it as a compliment...

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You look exactly like my sister.

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I'm craving some bacon, wanna strip?

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MAN: hey, are youa gust of wind? cause you blow me away! WOMAN: really? that makes me happy! i was getting kinda sick of you being here!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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