*When you get her to your place* I'm just going to be honest. I've been on the FBI's most wanted list for quite some time now.

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-Can I buy you a drink? -Go ahead, but only if you buy my boyfriend one too!

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If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put "U" and "I" as far apart as possible.

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Woman: Hey you look hot and cool, wanna chat? "Man": Meh.. I just stand here with my beerglass trying to look cool in hopes that women ask me out... Woman: UGH! "Man": May I please come with you? Eh... where are you going... HEY! Moral: Trying to look like James Bond in the darkest corner of a bar is not flirting you trucking moron!

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Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

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Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

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if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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You're like a drug to me. why because I'm so addicting?:) No, because you ruined my life.

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I have a .357 magnum pointed at your kidney. Wanna go get some coffee?

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If we were confronted, by a vicious man-eating bear with chain-saws for hands and fangs, holding a hammer; than I would sincerley hope you wouldn't be harmed because you're pretty.

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You must be tired because you've been running through my mind all day! ...I'm a paraplegic, asshole.

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Glass Basketball

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Hey gurl, you smell like tape!

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That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

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Are those space pants? Because no one is going to hear you scream later.

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-If I take you home, will you iron my clothes and make me a sandwich?

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Every kiss begins with K. Except for ugly, that begins with U.

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If I could rearange the alphabet id put "I-W-A-N-T-S-E-X-Y-O-U together. SIr, not really but that was kinda impressive. Me: I know...

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Those must be space pants, because your ass is out of this world That must be a donkeys tongue, because its making an ass out of you.

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-I can see forever in your eyes. -But all I can see is never in yours.

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Yeah you got me there dude, you really got my bragging rights... I am here with some "just" (nothing special) friend of my wife, that is wearing me out as she wont get off my Swagger, but while mentioning it like this makes me just as depraved as her... Gotta say, woman pleading me to get jumping on my cock, while my wife makes us breakfast... ...Im done being the king, im a fucking God. Anyway, "Eriksen" (you know who I mean) is pissed at me because I was supposed to be at work, and he apparently spends time here looking for me when he knows I am getting down and... Man this woman needs the cock... I mean at this rate she will bang me to death... ...But what a way to go. But seriously, would I really be at work, and allow you to come get my/now your car from garage whose walls are so paper thin that the police and securitas would be on your ass if I was not at least nearby? (well securitas are lazy, but as a lawyer, I benefit from suing them... Again) There are like eight alarms there, and you so gangsta you would get jailed. UPDATE: Punches, not slaps, remember the guy who punched that sweet chick when he got drunk, and then you punched me down and I got up and broke your jaw? Yeah that shit stings still, Five punches, at any time (no haymakers hey, I know my haymakers/uppercuts) but you take five punches... The fuck am I talking to, whigs is here already... Moral: I wont just write this shit just to make it all disappear with a delete button, fuck, im a super sayan!

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hey bitch

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-Baby, do you know karate? Your body is kickin'! -I do actually. Would your crotch like a demonstration?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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