- Anti-Pickup Line

Real life number XX: Girl: I will only sleep with you if you bring along your hot friend over there. Me: Uh, like a threesome with a guy? Uh... Maybe let me think about it... At nighttime: Me: Hey Tobias, she said yes about screwing with me if you join in, but I swear I will kick your ass if you touch me! Tobias: Like if I touch you sexually? Me: Yeah! duh! Tobias: WHY?! Not even like a little? Moral: Not as much a anti-joke as the weirdest thing I ever experienced...

Do you have an STD? No. DO you want one??

Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! walks away disgusted Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

Batman enters a bar: Batman: Ladies... I am Batman... everyone runs out screaming Batman: facepalm Moral: Want to be feared? Well what did you expect? Who I am? Are you dense? Retarded or something? I am the goddamn Moral-Man!

roses are red, violets are blue, i have some money, how much are you?

Can I have this dance? Sure just give me a minute to load my gun

"I'd like to get you out of those clothes. Really, they aren't very flattering. That color looks awful on you and those pants make you look fat."

Do your parents have Down Syndrome? Because your really special.

Hi I'm Shaniqua.

Man: hey... you seem pretty paralytic and unable to move in that wheelchair ;) Woman: uh oh...well actually I can move a bit... Man: Good because I do not wanna do ALL the thrusting back and forth... Woman: Bu.. but... I... I do not want to... Man: Well if you do not want sex, then just run away... ;) FATALITY... FLAWLESS VICTORY... RAPEALITY!

He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

I know who you are, and where you live. Can we meet there later?

Does the carpet match the drapes? -Do I look bald?

-Get in the Van

Did you fall from heaven? Because, I believe in the afterlife.

Sorry to take up space, but this is simply my reply to the vile threats to that person whose line starts with "what did you say little bitch", know that he has no idea what he is talking about, and is possibly a simple mental case. Seriously, who the hell are you? And even so, who the hell do you think you are? Yeah with your terrible lack of discipline there is no way in hell you are or would become a soldier. You know very well that the navy would never waste its resources on helping your selfish and childish acts of revenge (or whatever you seek) Death threats will get you nowhere, and you can fully threaten me, but know that I live in Norway, and you can trace me and send your whole unit (if you had one) but by then you would solely be responsible for acts of war and be properly executed for international treason. Know your place civilian, we fight to protect you, do not shame us with your childish vendetta. Drill Sergeant Axel "Strength" Godøy. Aka "Moral Man" Ps: Threaten anyone again, and I will fill a full report and assure that your IP is banned from this network, you are shaming your people, your country and all that fight to defend world peace, try me out and see, give me that luxury.

Woman: Hey hot stuff! Are you new around he... Man: Eh, I am not comfortable with women hitting on me, even hot ones like you, its just uh... awkward and... Woman: uh sorry, its not like I was hitting on you nor anything ;), Why dont you hit on me? Man: Uh... I err.. how you... uh... the guy proceeds to stare at the floor for the next five minutes then runs out crying Moral: NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERD!

Do you work at Subway? Cuz you just gave me a footlong

Hello my name is Horny and... oops... I got it wrong didn't I?

Hey you should let me have sex with you! Why? Because I'm going to do it anyway!

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Boy: Is your mom mexican? Girl: No/Yes why? Boy: Just wondering.

if i was a fly, i'd be all over you, because you are the SHIT.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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