Hello my name is Pogo. Would you like to jump on my stick?

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Is there a mirror in your pocket?... Because if so, you should probably take it out and, uh, fix what you have going on there.

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I am Lucifer, my color is blue I already got my queen TO HELL WITH YOU! Moral: Know my name and fear it, I am now and forever.

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GEDDINTHEFRIGGENCAR

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhyming get in the van.

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Man: Comon babe a little BJ wont hurt anyone get down..... Woman: sorry im alergic to peanuts

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Roses are red Violets are gold Get on your knees And do what your told

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Are you from tennessee? Cause you've got fine written all over you.

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-"Hey babe, you gotta nice ass!" -"Yep, and it doesn't like a rude one staring at it."

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Guy: Hey babe, do you have a GPS... I'm lost in your eyes. Girl: Make a U-Turn

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-Hey, I lost my number. Can I have yours? -No.

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Hello im a thief and I'm here to steal your purse

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Girl, you must have fallen from heaven...because you're dead.

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Man: Your body is a tempe! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

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-I heard you broke up :). -Yes, cookies to put in my ice cream!

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I'm a bad lover. I once caught a peeping tom booing me.-Rodney Dangerfield

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Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

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Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

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http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

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"Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes." "They always say that before they go to sleep."

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Guy: You look two times as beautiful with makup on. Girl: Really? I think you would too.

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Me: Have you ever dreamed, of owning a thousand sparkly gems? Woman: No why? You got some? Me: No, but now but now we can dream together t under the sparkling stars under the sky... Moral: Hey, she said aww... And touched my hand before chatting with her friend... and as I turned my hand... was a piece of paper, with a written number...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!