- Haven't we met before? - Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.

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Jdkfk

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I couldn't help but notice you from the other side of the bar. You look way better from over there.

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Baby, I love every muscle in your body... Especially mine.

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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Do women shake the petrol pump after filling or is that just a guy thing?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Girl:Want to go out this Friday? Boy: No I like to stay inside. Girl: No I mean are you free this Friday? Boy:No Im expencive!

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Guy: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl: No, but it will hurt when I pepper spray you.

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Him: Has anyone ever told you that you are absolutely beautifull...?? Her: (smiles) and says no.. Him: there is a good reaseon for that..

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Boy: If i can rearrange the keyboard, i'll put U and I next to each other Girl: It's already together dumbass

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Sigh... No I do not have a van... Just get in the plane!

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Man: Wanna hear a joke about my C*ck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my P*ssy, oh wait you'll never get it

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why cant you comb your hair cuz you got cancer othere guy :ahahahaah fag

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Is your dad a terrorist?? 'Cause you're a sex bomb.

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Male: Paper or plastic? Female: What? Male: Paper or plastic, you know, to put over your head.

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Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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adam burdass

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Hey i got a job for you. But it blows.

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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It that a tsunami in your panties or are you excited to see me.. :)

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He: Did you fall from Heaven? She: Well... He: 'Cos I got an erection. She: -__-

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Hitler: Hey Mädchen, du bist Jude? Girl: What? Hitler: Ärmel hochkrempeln, ich brauche deine Nummer.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!