- Anti-Pickup Line

If you're still here when I get drunk, this is your lucky night.

It's not Rape* If you yell surprise.

Stop Footing Around

You're like chocolate pudding. You look like crap.

free candy....

Hey, nice shoes. Where did you buy them ? My girlfriend wants shoes like that.

Hello little girl would you like some candy, yes? ;-)

He: Did you fall from Heaven? She: Well... He: 'Cos I got an erection. She: -__-

Ma'am, I'm sorry I'd like to ask a favour. Yes? Well, my penis died and I was wondering if I could bury it in your vagina?

-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

Guy: How much does a polar bear way? Girl; About 500 kilograms

Hey girl, want to meet the guy with the largest dick in town ;)? Wow yeah sure! Yeah that would be like cool rite? Moral: The biggest? looks down pants Meh!

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Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

Guy: If you look at your keyboard, you see U and I together. Girl: Look underneath. It says JK.

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

-If I could arrange the alphabet, that would be cool.

the most beatiful woman I have ever seen, so could you move out the way please

Roses are red Violets are gold Get on your knees And do what your told

Hey baby wana come over for dinner? Sure whats cookin? Your dead body after I kill ur ugly face derrp

He:walks over She: What is it now? He:Unzips fly. She : OH DEAR CHRIST NO

Hi there, stand still, hmm, hmm... Well, your tits are firm, lets feel up ya pussy too huh? Then your... other thingie... Why you runnin? Moral: Believe in stuff!

Does this rag smell like chloroform?

Baby if you were homework, I would do you all the time

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!