Man: Hey I am the hunk that writes the stories with morals, and I thumb them up myself... since they mostly get thumbed down slower that way... Ladies: REALLY! WOW WE NEVER THOUGHT WE WOULD MEET A CELEBRITY! LETS HAVE AN ORGY! Man: HEY! LADIES WAIT WAIT! ONLY 8 AT THE TIME! HELP I AM GETTING GRAPED!... Anyway who am I kidding please proceed but stop fighting over the joystick I have enough joy to all thanks to my writing progress!¨ Moral: His-tory AKa My-Story, and you know that they say that the winners are the one to write history ;), and if you do not know what I mean, you are probable banging me too right now... (true story)

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Hitler: Hey Mädchen, du bist Jude? Girl: What? Hitler: Ärmel hochkrempeln, ich brauche deine Nummer.

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what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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A couple wanted to try something different in the bedroom, The wife suggests they do it in a 69 position so they get into position but the wife lets one off in the husbands face she apologises and they try again when the wife farts again the husband gets up to leave and says no I don't think I can do this another 67 times!

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Were your parents chemists? cuz you look like TEST TUBE BABY :D

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why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

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Male: If you were a booger, I'd pick you first. Female: If you were an ass, I would kick you first.

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GIRL: Has anyone ever told you how hansom you are? MAN: My mother, some of her older friends, and beautiful women your age that I end up sleeping with.

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if I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd put my dick in your ass

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Guy:My tummy hurts Girl: Oh!! Are you pregnant ? Guy: Yeah!!! With a baby elephant!! Girl:WHAT!!!! Guy: Yeah!! Wanna see its trunk

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"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

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At a bar: Hello! Moral: Keep the damn lines short! (A moral man original, not to be confused with the exploding bar or whoever put morals in their sstories, feel free to do so though! I mean anyone can see from the quality whose are mine ;)

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-Do you like me? -No

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"Hey can I get your number?" "-12 Like the inches of your dick."

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Q: How did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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Man: DAMN BABE YOUR SO DAMN HOT I... Woman: You know what? Im so sick of you guys hitt... Man: OOOOOOOOOOOOH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! YEEEEEEEEEES THIS IS DELISHUSH! Woman: WHAT HAPPENED? :O Man: Huh? Never mind, ZZZZZZZZZZZZ

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Violets are blue. Roses are red. Your window was open. I'm under your bed.

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-Are you free anytime soon? -No. I'm very expensive

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Roses are red Violates are blue Get in the van I have a gun.

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You like my boobies ;) Girl: I said no you disgusting fat bastard! Moral: What fucking kind of MOTHERFUCKING MORAL are you expecting to find here?!?

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Hey, I your dad a baker?...Cuz it would be really cool if he were a baker.

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Women love it when you kiss their neck. Just not while they are driving and while you're in the back seat and when they don't know you...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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