(boy gives flowers to a girl) Girl: Are these for me? Boy: Nope, I just want you to hold them for me for a second..

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Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

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Man:Hey, do you know what chloroform smells like? Woman:No. Man:Well, you're about to find out.

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-Your the hottest girl i have ever met -I'm a man

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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Her: Are you from China? Because I’m China get your number Him: Tibet you are. But I'm not Russian into anything, sorry.

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wanna go halves on a b*stard?

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Hey i got a job for you. But it blows.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'U' and 'I' together. - No, it's okay. 'N' and 'O' are already together.

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-So, you wanna...? -I'm on my period.

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Get in the van.

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I also got a phd. Awesome in what? Uh wait, is phd and std the same? Wait I mean... Moral: Just leave you dont want to find out the wrong way.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

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Do you believe in angels? Cool, what about goblins?

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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EVERYONE ELSE

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male: hey wanna ride female: STRANGER DANGER!

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You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

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At a Bar for blacks... and whites... and everybody else... Man: I can last for hours in bed! Woman: *gets closer and whispers in his ear: Really? Man: OH YeeeeeaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH! Woman: Lets go to your place... Man: Meh, I am done. Moral: Oh YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Excuse me I need to go change clothes...

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Drink this!

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Why are you crying? I have to walk out these woods alone!

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I love every bone in your body, especially mine.

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Man: If I ask you to go on a date, would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this one? Woman: (pause) Rape!

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Boy:Nice hair Girl: (removes the wig) there you go! have fun

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!