*is your name angel cuz that's all i see? *is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

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Is that a ladder in your hose or the stairway to heaven? It is the stairway to heaven, but I've already got an asshole up there

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- I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true. - First wish: don't speak ever again.

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Girl, you must have fallen from heaven...because you're dead.

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He: Did you fall from Heaven? She: Well... He: 'Cos I got an erection. She: -__-

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Are you from Tennessee? Because we are both in Tennessee and I thought asking where you grew up would be a good way to get to know you better.

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Haven't we met somewheer before? Yes, son.

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Man, no im still waiting,need to get my kids, hope its fine son, okay punches, captain falcon, but you break my jaw, I wont even ask for you to pay the bill, ill expect it. Man, good times, honestly, i was not even drunk, I was high as shit, never again tho, they did not tell me it was "magic tobacco" until I started seeing numbers NUMBAS! Hey, mind if I come stay sometime? I mean we really miss you son, you always at the fuckhouse now. Just me and... Well the gang... Just like the twelve of us, tell me who you dont want to invite and ill bounce him out for you. Man dog, that chick I punched down was pretty as fuck, she would have been my wife... Anyway just fucking happy finally a real car dude! If she fucks you to death, you gonna go out young and a Legend among gods, let her keep on sucka! (just don forget bout my sis huh? She asks about you too fucking much already) Man, you got me typing almost as much as you dog, anyway is you know, in four hours allright? If not screw my kid, I need a car ill get him a cab.

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Man: Do you like a sensitive guy? Women: Yeah, I used to be one.

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Dont let this rape turn into a murder

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Eat me, I'm organic!

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-Hey, baby, What's your sign? -Stop.

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Losers pick-up sex guide. 1. Create a beautiful environment at home, with candles, romantic music, etc. 2. Buy lube, some sexy female underwear, a couple of sex toys, some erotic magazines to excite you`re partner. 3. Pick-up you`re stuff and masturbate.

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Are you from Tennessee? Youre the only 10 i see, and im 59. I bet we could 69 beautifully.

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"Hey can I get your number?" "-12 Like the inches of your dick."

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*When you get her to your place* I'm just going to be honest. I've been on the FBI's most wanted list for quite some time now.

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You look exactly like my sister.

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Do you have sunburn, or are you always this hot? It's sunburn.

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Is that a ladder in your tights or are you just a cheap whore?!

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Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

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Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

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Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

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Guy: Hey baby, you must be a general, because you're making my PRIVATES stand at attention! Girl: Hmm..they're still a MAJOR disappointment.

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Hey gorgeous what are you drinking? Cyanide.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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