Whenever I look at stars I think of you... Because your only beatiful from a distance.

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Do you know karate? Because I'd like to kick you in the face.

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hey did you fall from heaven? because my car is all smashed up.

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You must be a parking ticket. Because you are dressed like i'd have to pay.

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In a classy bar: KEEP IT CLASSY! Man: Hello there dear... your eyes sparkle like the sun itself... Woman: Oh... thank you random stranger, that is the most beautiful thing someone have ever said to me :D Man: Really? But you are gorgeous (the two proceed to have a long CLASSY conversation and laughing in a classy reserved matter and drinking classy champagne and whatever... and then: Man: Ahahaha yes that is indeed true... By the way... would you mind becoming the single lonely mother of my children? Moral: skipped most of school classes... class ... overrated...

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-Get in the Van

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*on Halloween* Male: My name's Dick, and you're a very pretty PUSSY-cat. Female: I'll cut off your penis.

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Man: HEY BITCH! LETS HAVE SEX! Damn ugly woman: OKAY! Next day... Man: Damn that was some nice sex, too bad the bitch was damn ugly though, even trough the beer googles... I wonder where she is... "damn ugly woman": woof woof! Bark bark! Moral: Do you see any moral in this immoral piece of shit? (Ps if you are stupid, the bitch was actually a dog... get it?)

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Hey giiiiiiiiiiirl, I'm no Flinstone but I can make your bedrock.

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I hate you already.

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"Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?" "Yes. I ruptured my bowels upon impact."

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Man: Comon babe a little BJ wont hurt anyone get down..... Woman: sorry im alergic to peanuts

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Guy: How much does a polar bear way? Girl; About 500 kilograms

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Male-where have you been all my life ? Female-not in it thats for sure Male-i was singing a song i wouldn't want YOU in my life Female-i was singing a song 2 *lies*

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Hey girl, I May not be Fred Flinstone but I can make your bed rock! ;)

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I have a twin bed...we should have a threesome;)))

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hey angel you duh sexy , if you duh rice i eat you everyday-pha haha

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- Can I have your number? - Sure. Twelve.

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Guy: Do you wanna be the sun of my life? Girl: Ok sure Guy: Then go stand 13. billion miles away from me

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Why didn't the boy make the soccer team? He missed the tryouts

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Man: How much does a polar bear weight? Girl: No idea... Man: Me either... By the way! Did you hear of the great blahblahblahblah that did blahalblahblah! Moral: Breaking the ice... easier than it seems...

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Hey babe, are your parents arseholes? Because your the shit.

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(Guy mumbles a bit, then says): You don't know me, but can I get you a drink? Yeah, sure... OK. HAHAHAA!!! Before I asked if you wanted a drink I mumbled "Do you want to have sex"? And you said yes! HAHAHAA!!!

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I have a gun.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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