- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

are you from tennessee? because your license plate said it.

Man: Oh.. girl you smell so nice... Girl: TRY ANOTHER LINE AND STOP LOOKING AT MY TlTS LOSER! Man: Uh... I am blind... Girl: Um...

Man: Hey, you dont look that fucking ugly, wanna go home with me? mirror: shatters Moral: If your ugliness ever shatters your mirror let me know, ill look at it and it will assemble itself back on its own.

imgonna r@pe you

"Rate your looks out of 10" "awkward... maybe 8 or 9 i guess?" "I said 10, not 100"

- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

He: did it hurt? She: when i fell from heaven? He: no. when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. go put some clothes on.

Do you work for UPS? 'Cause i could swear that you were checking out my package.

HONEY! I SEE MEDUSA!!!!!!!!!!! oh wait, it was just you

Do you have cancer, because you look diseased.

Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! walks away disgusted Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

Him: Nice legs. What time do they open? Her: Members only, I'm afraid,

"is that a ladder in your tights? or a fire escape for the crabs?"

boy: hey wanna hang out some time?! girl: O MY GOD! r u hannah montanna?!

"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

Hey girl, I heard you are a lesbian! So which part of lesbia are you from? Moral: Geography is overrated, he got laid.

BOY: Are you thinking what im thinking? GIRL: I dont know, what are you thinking? BOY: both of our bum cracks smell like buttery popcorn, i like popcorn :)

man:hey can you help me look for my dog i lost him in this cheap motel room girl: oh really i didnt know rotten garbage like you actully a had a friend even if it is a pet!

That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

Hey baby, wanna make $50?

Male: You are a Drugs? Female: Why? because your so addicted to me? Male: Nope, You ruined my life!

Baby, I love every muscle in your body... Especially mine.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book