Boy: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Girl: Did it hurt when you were thrust through the ash-filled layers of Hell?

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Q: Why are Italian girls so hairy? A: Because it turns out its a genetic predisposition in which almost all males and females have when of the Italian ethnicity, these genetics are also parts of other race types.

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You're like a star in the sky. Nothing but gas.

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Hey baby, you make me wanna get a job.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blob fish are ugly and so are you.

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Girl - You smell nice, what have you got on? Boy - I have a hardon but i didn't think you could smell it.

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-As I slipped my finger in her hole I could feel her getting wetter and wetter, When I pulled it out she was going down on me. I should probably start looking for a new boat...

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Sex?

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M. Do you want to go out with me? F. Okay but first take me to your place where we can be alone to make furious love to one another M. Wow this never happens I must be.. (Wakes up) dreaming

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Baby! you're on fire! Yeah, well I am an arsonist.

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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A long time ago I had a vision of someone like you. I was in a psych ward, wearing a straight jacket. Would you like some blended cheese?

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Guy: (any sexual pick up line) Girl: I'm sorry but I don't think there is enough room in my pants for two assholes.

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M:Hey baby you must be a GENERAL because your making my PRIVATES stand up F:Hmm, Your still a MAJOR disappointment See whaat i did tharrgh?

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On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

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guy:do you know how much a polar bear weighs? girl: ..no, how much?? guy:i dunno but probly not as much as you

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Boy : Gurle: hi

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-Because you are not very attractive I figure you have low self-esteem. I will prey on your poor self-image for short-term sexual gratification. Also, you are really drunk. -OK.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet i would pass on it.

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Man: Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Ay girl, those jeans make your ass look fat. Now I'ma get you pregnant while you make breakfast.

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Are you from Austrailia? Because I'd like to put my tongue in your butthole

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- You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -No, your mind is so small I can't even take a step in it!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!