Boy: You remind me of the ocean Girl: Because I'm mysterious, adventurous, and romantic? Boy: No, because you make me sick

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You know, you can't spell "stud" without STD and U

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I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

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Guy: I got you a gift. It's a Necklace. Girl: Awww thats so nice. Guy: BAZINGA Its my dick.

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Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

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Does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

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Guy: hey, we have been friends for a long time but I really need to tell you something Girl: omg I love you too :D Guy: what, no no. I'm a zoophilic

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M: You make me wanna be a terrorist! W: Why? M: I so wanna blow on you right now...

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At a bar (another real life one): Man: You sort of look like a woman from a certain angle... I am so drunk I can pretend you are a woman all night long! ????: I AM A WOMAN! Man: How can we fix this so you can come home with me? Moral: Becoming unpopular was my goal, but third next to Justin Beiber? Maybe I overdid this a bit...

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Male: Do you know if there is an airport around here? Cause my heart took off, when I saw you... Female: Yeah? Well my heart crashed in the Hudson River when I saw you!

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- I would love to get into your pants... - You can't: I have an asshole in there already.

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He - Nice shoes. She - Thanks. He - But i think they would look better in my pants.

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Man and girl talking: Girl: ARE YOU GETTING A HARDON? Man: You think I am a pervert or something? Of course not! Its just the hamster I keep between my ballsack!

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Are you a broom? Cause you look like a rather dull, inanimate object that collects dust.

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Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

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Id catch a grenade for ya, but you won't do the same

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Those must be space pants, because your ass is out of this world That must be a donkeys tongue, because its making an ass out of you.

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You wanna go somewhere? Yeah, where? The Swingers Association.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - U and me - Grammer freak

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A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

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Got milk? Cuz baby, im of it!

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wanna try out my joystick? (gamer-joke)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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