-Heyyy there (; -Im lesbian.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, id put my dick in your mouth.

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Sex?

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- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? - No but I scraped my knees when I climbed up from hell

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I think your cute. I though you were cute, until I saw you...

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I have never dated a horse-faced woman before :)

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"Wow, you look so thin! Are you wearing a girdle?"

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"Can I buy you a drink or do I have to have sex with you first?"

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Are you an erection? 'Cause you're growing on me.

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He: How do you like your eggs in the morning? She: Unfertilised!

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Me. Would you like me to get you a ring for valentines day? Girlfriend: Nothing would make me happier! So I got her nothing...

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Man: Wanna come home watch my REALLY big stamp collection? ;) ;) Girl: Sure ;) ;) At home: Man: Why are you taking your clothes off? Girl: Uh... nevermind... Moments later: Man: And this one is a rare misprint from 1980, and this one is actually quite common but.., Girl: Sigh... :(

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Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

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Akshay Kumar's 'Special Chabbis' is a mind-action film, says director

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhyming get in the van.

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BOY-i love you GIRL-(sneezes) sorry im allergic to bullshit

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Woman: Hey you look hot and cool, wanna chat? "Man": Meh.. I just stand here with my beerglass trying to look cool in hopes that women ask me out... Woman: UGH! "Man": May I please come with you? Eh... where are you going... HEY! Moral: Trying to look like James Bond in the darkest corner of a bar is not flirting you trucking moron!

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Excuse me lady, may I say that you got wonderful hands? Aww please yes. Would you like a drink my buy? Please :D How classy. Why thank you, would you fancy some hard anal sex on camera for end up on youtube? Moral: He is keeping it classy...

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Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who only wants to cuddle.

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Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! *Woman slams man with baseball bat* Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!

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Do you live around here often?

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Want to go out? No

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Are your parents retarded? Because you sure are special.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!