I have been known to give women the best fake orgasms ever ;)

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- You're a bombshell! - Too bad it ain't gonna BANG!

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I hope you know CPR, because you so ugly you take my breath away

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- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock? -That depends on the size of the rock. -You don't really get it, do you? -Get what?

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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- I think i lost my number, can i have yours? - I think i lost my number too.

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You must be a parking ticket. Because you are dressed like i'd have to pay.

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Man - I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away. Woman - Good cus' your breath stinks!

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Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

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Girl, now I want you to be on top! Okay, what position? DOGGY STYLE! Moral: Sickman Fraud, with that name smart people should listen with one eye open, while geniuses keep their eyes and ears shut.

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Man: did you just fart cuz you blew me away! Woman: actually I did, sorry if it smells I had enchiladas for lunch.

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Man with huge arms and HUGE muscles enters a... pub! (for variety`s sake) "Hey you like fisting!" Woman: Yeah kinda.. I mean HOLY SHIT NO! I DONT PLEASE STOP NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH! Moral: Get a room you two! (a moral man original)

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Boy: You remind me of the ocean Girl: Because I'm mysterious, adventurous, and romantic? Boy: No, because you make me sick

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M - wanna have some fun? F - No! M - 0k, i have no choice but to rape you!

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Guy: Hey, I think you're really sweet... Girl: Aww, thanks Guy: Is that why you're so fat?

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Hey babe, how about my mom drives us to the comic book store in her Civic? I got a carseat with seat belts for two.

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet... that would be nice..

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Are you a broom? Cause you look like a rather dull, inanimate object that collects dust.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im a serial killer So GTFO before i kill you

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Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

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Have you been followed? 'Cuz i've been seeing people behind your back.

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If I said you had a beautiful body I'd be lying.

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I have a gun.

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Hey, nice shoes. Where did you buy them ? My girlfriend wants shoes like that.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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