Every girl wants to be swept off her feet... It's when you put her in the trunk of your car that she starts to freak out.

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He: How do you like your eggs in the morning? She: Unfertilised!

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Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

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-Hey, I lost my number. Can I have yours? -No.

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Sigh... No I do not have a van... Just get in the plane!

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Girl: Hey, why don't you and I go out to dinner? Guy: Thanks, but if I wanted to watch a whore stuff her face full of meat, I'd just load up Redtube.

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Male: Paper or plastic? Female: What? Male: Paper or plastic, you know, to put over your head.

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are you a brush because you just swept me off my feet

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Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

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M- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? W- I'm an atheist.

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Man - How was your trip from heaven? Woman - Great... until now.

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Man: Are you a beach? Cause I'm sure there's a lot of crabs crawling around down there

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Shy-guy: Hey uh, girl, we have been on like 40 dates, what do you um... You know say we go to my place for once and have some drinks? Shy-girl: Eh, well su-sure I mean its been over forty dates, but ill just take coffee if its oka... Shy-guy: OMG YOU DAMN EASY SKANK! HOLY SHIT YOU WHERE GONNA GIVE IT ALL WHERE YOU NOT? LOL NO TIME FOR DESPERATE BlTCHES! Moral: Not to be confused with the slightly less popular Nintendo character Shy Guy

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Ever had violent sex with a murderer/rapist? ;) ;)

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Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

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Jdkfk

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You're like chocolate pudding. You look like crap.

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Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

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Do you want to dance No I suppose a blow job is out of the question then

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You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

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Sorry to take up space, but this is simply my reply to the vile threats to that person whose line starts with "what did you say little bitch", know that he has no idea what he is talking about, and is possibly a simple mental case. Seriously, who the hell are you? And even so, who the hell do you think you are? Yeah with your terrible lack of discipline there is no way in hell you are or would become a soldier. You know very well that the navy would never waste its resources on helping your selfish and childish acts of revenge (or whatever you seek) Death threats will get you nowhere, and you can fully threaten me, but know that I live in Norway, and you can trace me and send your whole unit (if you had one) but by then you would solely be responsible for acts of war and be properly executed for international treason. Know your place civilian, we fight to protect you, do not shame us with your childish vendetta. Drill Sergeant Axel "Strength" Godøy. Aka "Moral Man" Ps: Threaten anyone again, and I will fill a full report and assure that your IP is banned from this network, you are shaming your people, your country and all that fight to defend world peace, try me out and see, give me that luxury.

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baby please dont make this rape turn into a murder

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Are you an angel? 'Cause you're the only ten I see.

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Hey Clarkson, you know about this pointless invention Named Nero The Moral man? Clarkson: No. Nero: No. Is this because horsehead network sucks? Clarkson: Yes. Nero: WTF AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE! Oh yeah I am fucking it away... Fuck me, every girl around me just ends up completely fucked.... ;)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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