bitch: I like it when guys punch me. Me: I love it when you shut the hell up and leave.

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are you from tennessee? because your license plate said it.

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Let me stick it in...just once baby...that's all I'll need. ;)

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-What's your favorite color? -bl... -mine too! Let's f***

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Boy:can i go out with you? Girl: no

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How much per quarter hour? Actually do you do 10 minute blocks?

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Hey baby, my name is Richard Gozinia. But my friends call me Dick. Dick Gozinia.

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How does a ghost walk through walls? There's normally a door.

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Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

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Girl:Want to go out this Friday? Boy: No I like to stay inside. Girl: No I mean are you free this Friday? Boy:No Im expencive!

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Mom im sixteen and after watching some japanese cartoons and dads gone, I wonder if I can... Son please put your pants back on! But mom! Im the man in the house now, so I invited my friends so you and I can have a stamina sex contest and... Moral: If she does not tell you to put up your pants... Well, you are the man in the house son ;)

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Man: (in indian accent) HELLO I AM VERY RICH INDIAN MAN, I HAVE COLLECTION OF EXPENSIVE CARS AND LIMOS, I TAKE LADY HOME AND MAKE SWEET LOVE TO HER, THEN GIVE HER LOTSA JEWELS AND MONEY! Woman: Cool ill come home with you. Man: Uh... can you lend me money for the bus?

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Do you work at Subway, because you're giving me a footlong. No actually, I once had a job at a local Quizno's Sub Shop. However a tragic fire killed several employees and customers at this very location. I survived, but lost have permanent Third-Degree burns across my body. My life is ruined, prick.

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Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

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Let's not turn this rape... into a murder

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Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got fine written all over you.

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Man: Do you sleep on your stomach? Woman: No... Man: Can I?

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Do you know why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

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I dont have sex on the first date - only if the opportunity comes

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hey Herpes Go Away!

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Man: Hey lady... you new here? I havent seen you around here before ;) Woman: Im your wife! >:/ Man: Which one of them? I have married so many sluts just to get sex with them... that I forget about...

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-Hey baby,what's your sign? (; -Do not enter. >_>

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Shy-guy: Hey uh, girl, we have been on like 40 dates, what do you um... You know say we go to my place for once and have some drinks? Shy-girl: Eh, well su-sure I mean its been over forty dates, but ill just take coffee if its oka... Shy-guy: OMG YOU DAMN EASY SKANK! HOLY SHIT YOU WHERE GONNA GIVE IT ALL WHERE YOU NOT? LOL NO TIME FOR DESPERATE BlTCHES! Moral: Not to be confused with the slightly less popular Nintendo character Shy Guy

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I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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