Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

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You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

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Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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"Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

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imgonna r@pe you

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My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

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Did you just fart? 'cos you blew me away

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GET INTO DA CHOPPAH! Moral: IM LIEUTENANT JOHN KIMBLE! I HAVE A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS YOU HAVE TO ANSWER IMMEDIATELY! Whoos your daddy? YOU STAP IT! YOU IDIEOUT!

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At a moral man bar... "the most awesome place on earth": Man: I thumb down my comments now, and somehow they end up thumbed the next day... Woman: Uh... what comments? Moral: Be specific... or at least dont brag to pick up chicks... now if you wanna be yourself and could not give shit about the rest, then go ahead! It will actually improve your chances!

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

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Are you a broom? Cause you look like a rather dull, inanimate object that collects dust.

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You got some junk in the trunk, can I dump my load in there too?

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- Does this rag smell like ether? - MMMPPPHHRPHRRG!

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Guy- I would do anything for you. Women- I wouldn't do you for anything!

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Are you from Wales, because...well...

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Hey :) Hi Do you like me? :) No :'( You never asked if i loved you... Awhhhh do you love me :) No

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Woman: Ugh I wish I could remember who you are, I mean you could even have Aids or H.I.V... Man: Hey yo don worry, Dogta tol `d I am positive so thats that Moral: The H.I.V awareness group was a message: We will go literally f/ck ourselves to death have a nice day.

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So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

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Is there a mirror in your pocket?... Because if so, you should probably take it out and, uh, fix what you have going on there.

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Guy: Hey baby, you must be a general, because you're making my PRIVATES stand at attention! Girl: Hmm..they're still a MAJOR disappointment.

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Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

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Those pants are very becoming on you, of course if i were on you id be cu.mm.ing too

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man-hey baby you wanna go somewhere girl-no thanks hells over there

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Man: Wanna come home watch my REALLY big stamp collection? ;) ;) Girl: Sure ;) ;) At home: Man: Why are you taking your clothes off? Girl: Uh... nevermind... Moments later: Man: And this one is a rare misprint from 1980, and this one is actually quite common but.., Girl: Sigh... :(

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!