Man: Your tag's showing. It says "Made in Heaven". Woman: *Proceeds to leak period blood into a puddle at the man's feet and walks away in silence*

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Guy: Can I have your number ? Girl: We are six.

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No more morals? I read his crap for hours! Moral: ;( Bye man.

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Man - Hey hun.. .Can I kiss the most beautiful girl on the whole party? ;) Wowan - Hell no. Man - Ah, I see... And what about you? Can I?

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guy scientist: hey can i send a probe to explore uranus? girl scientist: hey can i send a rocket with you in it to the sun/

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" Grab your coat love ...it's cold in my basement"

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Roses are red Violates are blue Get in the van I have a gun.

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Every girl wants to be swept off her feet... It's when you put her in the trunk of your car that she starts to freak out.

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wanna try out my joystick? (gamer-joke)

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Yeah... you'll have to do.

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Damn girl! You`re fat and ugly! its ok though, cuz Im desperate!

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Me: Have you ever dreamed, of owning a thousand sparkly gems? Woman: No why? You got some? Me: No, but now but now we can dream together t under the sparkling stars under the sky... Moral: Hey, she said aww... And touched my hand before chatting with her friend... and as I turned my hand... was a piece of paper, with a written number...

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Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

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Women love it when you kiss their neck. Just not while they are driving and while you're in the back seat and when they don't know you...

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Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

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Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

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- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

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One hot summer night in 1960, Steve had his first date with Susie. He went to pick her up and her mom answered the door. She invited him in, and asked him what they planned to do on their date. Steve replied that they’d probably see a movie then get a burger. Susie’s mom said, “Well, Susie really likes to screw.” Steve said, “Huh?” Her mom said, “Yes, she loves it. She could probably screw all night.” “Okay, thanks!” replied Steve, mentally rearranging his plans for the night. A few minutes later Susie came downstairs and they left on their date. About a half hour later Susie came running back in the house, her clothes disheveled, and yelled: “Mom, it’s called the TWIST! The name of the goddamn dance is the TWIST!”

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Hey babe, take a walk on the wild side. (;

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-I know you want to ask me out. I am free anytime. -Ok, then go out.

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-Darling, I will never stop pursuing you. Even from the ends of the earth, I will follow you wherever you go. Really, I love you that much. -"Honey", I will call the police and have you thrown in jail for stalking me. Really, I hate you that much.

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Guy: Hey would you like to dance? Girl: No! Guy: Oh come on! Don't be picky. I wasn't!

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I hope you're not a vegetarian.... because my dick is made of meat.

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- you are in my mind everyday - and your in my way

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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