If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

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-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

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"You look like an angel that fell from heaven and hit its face on the pavement."

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Man: If I ask you to go on a date, would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this one? Woman: (pause) Rape!

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Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got fine written all over you.

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him: your like the sun in the morning. her: that so sweet! him: Your very big and i can even stare at you for more then 2 secondes.

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

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B: Can I have your number ? G: Sure.. 666

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Try to put your arm around her. If she pushes you away, then say: "Relax! Relax. I'll pay for the first abortion!"

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-How did you get to be so beautiful? -I must’ve been given your share.

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You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

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Are those space pants? Cause there's not enough space in my house to fit your ass.

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I'll never forget the day I swept you off of my feet.

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Me: You know what bitch... You are *burp* such a bitch... That I am just gonna smear peanut butter on my crotch and... Lady: Dude, I am a man but okay! Me: You are a guy? Did you have to tell me that? I mean I got beer googles but I hear perfectly well! Then his girlfriend which happened to be my cousin showed up and... *facepalm*

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Does this rag smell of chloroform to you?

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-Can I buy you a drink? -Go ahead, but only if you buy my boyfriend one too!

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Man: hey... you seem pretty paralytic and unable to move in that wheelchair ;) Woman: uh oh...well actually I can move a bit... Man: Good because I do not wanna do ALL the thrusting back and forth... Woman: Bu.. but... I... I do not want to... Man: Well if you do not want sex, then just run away... ;) FATALITY... FLAWLESS VICTORY... RAPEALITY!

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Five dollar women... WOO!

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-Your the hottest girl i have ever met -I'm a man

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If you were on a shelf at build a bear workshop ....... I would stuff you , except it wouldn't be with cotton

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Damn you look good in beer goggles.

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you actually look alright with the lights on.

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Does anyone have a toothpick? I need to pick the crabs out of the cracks of my teeth.

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Man : Wanna go to my house tonight? Woman : I'm not sure if a rock can fit 2 people inside.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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