Dude: Do you have insurance on you ass? Gal: Why? Dude: Because Im about to hit it. Gal: I hope you have insurance on your face (punch).

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- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

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Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

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- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

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man: you look like my favorite girl. Girl: is that so? Man: yupp, best dog i ever had.

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Man and woman in bed: Man: You know I am somewhat a deviant right? Woman: Sure but I am drunk so lets just do it.. Man: I AM SO GONNA BANG YOU! (Man throws dynamite at woman) Woman: WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUU Moral: BANG INDEED... case closed.

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Hey I used to be a man, but I'm pretty horny.

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Guy: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl: No, but it will hurt when I pepper spray you.

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Hey :) Hi Do you like me? :) No :'( You never asked if i loved you... Awhhhh do you love me :) No

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Are you from Ireland cause my penis is dublin'

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Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

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Is it true you black men are as hung as a horse? Uh lady, no idea I like ignore their stuff. Yeah but you know, I seen a lot of them and they are huge and look salty an... Woman! Im so outta here! Moral: Now the man is goin! C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!

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I'm your Edward and your my Bella

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Girl! you are almost as awesome as horsehead network! Moral: I got balls of steel!

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Male: I'm all you've got good lookin' Female: then I must not have alot

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He: Did it hurt? She: When I fell from heaven? heard it before... He: No, when you fell from the ugly tree!

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The ability to speak with dead relatives but only whilst masturbating

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guy: hey do you know how to sly a dragon? girl:No. guy: well your no help.

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Do you come here often? Because you're usually working the streets whenever I see you.

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Girl: Hey, why don't you and I go out to dinner? Guy: Thanks, but if I wanted to watch a whore stuff her face full of meat, I'd just load up Redtube.

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- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

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WOW MY LONGEST EVER COMMENT BELOW GOT A THUMBS UPS WOOT-WO-WO-WOROWOOOT *Partyravelights that confetti crap and... Moral: I dont really give a shit and all...

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Jack is riding his new yellow bicycle. His father bought it for his 12th anniversary. Jack is ecstatic to have his first ride down his street. Erick thinks its ugly.

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*is your name angel cuz that's all i see? *is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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