At a bar... sigh... Woman: Hey cutie wanna go home? "Man" hello I am twelve... what is this? Moral: Hello I am eight... what is this?

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Me: You know what bitch... You are *burp* such a bitch... That I am just gonna smear peanut butter on my crotch and... Lady: Dude, I am a man but okay! Me: You are a guy? Did you have to tell me that? I mean I got beer googles but I hear perfectly well! Then his girlfriend which happened to be my cousin showed up and... *facepalm*

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" Grab your coat love ...it's cold in my basement"

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You remind me of America. How so? Because you so fat!

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if I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd put my dick in your ass

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Hi, I've taken like 8 dumps today... Wanna dance?

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The word of today is "leg's",no whom are i kidding, bird is the word!

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why can't a black person play baseball because the steal bases

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SEE WHAT’S UP, DOWN UNDER.

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' together. -If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would take 'U' out entirely.

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Your face is like mace, every time i see if i get blinded

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Is there a mirror in your pocket?... Because if so, you should probably take it out and, uh, fix what you have going on there.

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Holla holla holla, ill be there like right now, its a bit far. But dawg, did you say you are both at work and banging a chick? Someone is bragging here yo son! Anyways, phone is dead, gotten towed like 50-60 times in total (not only the freeway), and... Nah man, its cool, you know I dont really ask for much, I mean I can still pay you something. Yeah your skinny bitch hands, you can slap me 50 times son.

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I hope you know CPR, because you so ugly you take my breath away

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet... that would be nice..

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Man: DAMN BABE YOUR SO DAMN HOT I... Woman: You know what? Im so sick of you guys hitt... Man: OOOOOOOOOOOOH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! YEEEEEEEEEES THIS IS DELISHUSH! Woman: WHAT HAPPENED? :O Man: Huh? Never mind, ZZZZZZZZZZZZ

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“I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.” (Groucho Marx)

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Charmeleon is Red, Squirtle is Blue, If you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you.

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Ya know what would look good on you? ME!

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Your skin would make a nice coat.

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Man: So, what's your sign? Woman: Out to lunch. Back whenever!

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You're like a star in the sky. Nothing but gas.

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male: hey i like you can i have your number female: what number? male: your pin number i want your money

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Guy: Are you an angel? Girl: Wait till I die, i'll be one.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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