- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

How much does a polar bear weigh? I don't know. Quite a lot, actually.

i would traval the earth for you. well then im going to the moon.

Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

Man: Honestly! I am just desperate, and besides you are damn hot! Woman: Lets go to your place ;) Moral: This works, the anti-part is that no one will believe me nor try it themselves... Incredible how the easiest way is the least used...

Wife: I have a confession to tell you my wife said to me one day... Before we got together I was raped by a masked man and I really liked it. Me: I know.

Man: So, what's your sign? Woman: Out to lunch. Back whenever!

Oh hotness I wanna bang you!

She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right." I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."

Man; Wanna play the rape game? Girl; No Man; That's the spirit

Get your coat love. I've got a knife

haha

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I wouldn't it's fine the way it is

Every girl wants to be swept off her feet... It's when you put her in the trunk of your car that she starts to freak out.

guy: do you like sea food? girl: hell yes, I got crabs, would you like some

Do you work at Subway, because you're giving me a footlong. No actually, I once had a job at a local Quizno's Sub Shop. However a tragic fire killed several employees and customers at this very location. I survived, but lost have permanent Third-Degree burns across my body. My life is ruined, prick.

Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

Did it hurt when you fell from the whore tree and banged every single guy on your way down?

boy - would you like to dance? girl - hell no! boy - I think you misunderstood me. I said you look fat in those pants. girl - That's why I said "Hell No!" girl - I'm trying to deny the fact that I look fat in my pants. boy - damnit! girl - Phew!

Hey :) Hi Do you like me? :) No :'( You never asked if i loved you... Awhhhh do you love me :) No

Male: I'd give her one Female: I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last person on earth Male: I was rating you out of 10 you ugly bitch

Did it hurt? When I fell from Heaven? NO! WHen you were shot up from hell for stealing my pick up line!!!

GET INTO DA CHOPPAH! Moral: IM LIEUTENANT JOHN KIMBLE! I HAVE A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS YOU HAVE TO ANSWER IMMEDIATELY! Whoos your daddy? YOU STAP IT! YOU IDIEOUT!

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book