And then one day God invented man, the worlds third most useless invention. Moral: I cant stop laughing, thank you everybody I actually got top grades in sociology studies for this moral man crap XD

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- Hey baby, what's your sign? - Dead End.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Hey baby, can I cream in your chocolate?

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Woman: You've got the body of a god, too bad that it's Buddha... Man: You've got the face of a Princess, too bad that it's Diana.

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Shall I compare you to a summer's day? Damn you're hot!

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I know who you are, and where you live. Can we meet there later?

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-Can I have your number? -Can my boyfriend punch you in the face?

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Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

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-Do you mind if i smoke? -No. I dont even mind if you burn....

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free candy....

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Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

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I am terribly sorry for talking to you, but I was wondering if...

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Q: What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? A: My zipper.

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' together. -If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would take 'U' out entirely.

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Guy: want to hear a joke about my penis. don't worry, it's too long Girl: want to hear a joke about my vagina. don't worry, you won't get it

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Woman: The church is fantastic, I see Jesus wherever I go! Me: I see a psycho wherever you go. Moral: PSYCHO CRUSHER!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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I scream, You scream, The Police come, It's Awkward...

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Are your legs tired? cuz ive got a raging boner and need to get rid of it

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male-"Do you have a rape fetish?" fenale-"No, i don't" male-"Ohh... Well you're not going enjoy this."

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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Your eyes are the color of my toilet water.

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A polar bear and a penguin were taking a bath. The polar bear asked the penguin to pass the soap. the penguin responded by saying,"What do i look like a microwave?"

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!