Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who only wants to cuddle.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you're a fucking hillbilly.

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Babe, you Jewish? cuz your on FIRE!

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *sigh* Did what hurt? (Expecting him to say "When you fell from heaven") Boy: When you broke through the earths crust, ascending from hell.

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"Wow, you look so thin! Are you wearing a girdle?"

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Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Guy : Hey, there's a party in my pants. Wanna join? ;] Girl : Can't, I'm allergic to crabs.

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"Can I buy you a drink or do I have to have sex with you first?"

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- hey id like my order for you - ok we put extra punch with it these days

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Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

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why can't a black person play baseball because the steal bases

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"Hey girl, is there a mirror in your pants?" "No, that's just my penis."

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Guy: Are you looking for a hot, sexy, fertile young man? Girl: No thanks, I used to be one.

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You remind me of America. How so? Because you so fat!

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Do women shake the petrol pump after filling or is that just a guy thing?

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Billy Hill: Man...THAT WAS GOOD SEX! I am glad I did not just bring one of those bitches that I usually drag home, your great Currie... great pussy! Ok Currie time to go home! Currie: meow... Moral: And you think that by bitches he meant bad women ahahahahha... BIlly Hill! Ring a bell nao?

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Boy: does your face hurt Girl: No. Why Boy Because it sure is hurting me

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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hey girl, whats your sign? slippery when wet.

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male: hey wanna ride female: STRANGER DANGER!

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For you thinking what is that shit below this comment? Go fuck yourself, for those that wonder why I typed that excellence, well read whatever... So why am I here once a year and type a lot of insanity here? Because I am quitting smoking... AGAIN. So after banging two chicks (one my wife STEAKSAUCE!) I just want a smoke right? RIGHT? To chill the adrenaline... My wife does not smoke (well if you can smoke cock then she is still the best smoker in town) Seriously, Tina has Prince... That explains her breath ugh... I am gonna get one anyways for great justice.

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Do you know karate... 'Cause I wanna know if you can fight back!

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Guy: are you AT&T because you are raising my bar Girl: Sorry I use Verizon. it has better 4G coverage

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Man:Yeah, hey yo I'm feelin' like Ray Charles I got my shades on, I don't know where they are You couldn't find me even if you had a radar And I spit rapidly AKAR! Woman: OK ok so you claim to be Ray Charles and all, not that you look like him nor have the same voice... but tell me, how the hell did Ray Charles himself manage to get himself stuck in the ladies sauna room eh? Man: To catch the sight of them boobies! I mean... uh... I do not know young lady, I must feel my way out of here, I hmm... no, this is too soft and round to be a doorknob, and this one is too big and round... hmm... maybe if I try lower I will... oh excuse the pole its my walking stick which I keep in my pants...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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