Did you fall from heaven because you landed on my wind shield some how

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Look at the keyboard, u and i are together. Look underneath, it says jk.

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guy: can i rape you? girl: No Guy: great that means any sex we have from now on is consensual, thanks

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I put the STD in Stud all I need is U

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By reason or by Strength, moral man has a serious side too, and I prevail. Moral: Threats... anyone in my unit threatening another would simply be thrown in jail for a couple of weeks, then kicked out, and using military equipment to threaten, trace and murder people is highly illegal. Asshole, troll or not, I will use my right and reason to have you removed permanently from the horsehead network if you persist.

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- Yo baby can I have your number? - Sure! My number is one *sticks up middle finger*

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Female: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Male: I'm actually a broom in disguise.

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Golgo12, sorry not here, If antijoke is down we will just have to chat another time, but you know for this piece of shit site`s rank as the worlds most useless man, its not the first time I achieve the impossible, or as I say "those claiming that somethings are impossible, should stay out of the way of those making it happen" Anyway, yeah point zero is my "world" and you can come see how you like it for yourself, so far its been working perfectly for 4 months, and while I am officially a cripple (for the meantime, a bit of lots of pain has never slowed me down for long, you get used to it) Ill keep talking long after I am dead apparently, as shutting up is a major factor with these painkillers. See ya.

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Grapist: I bet you like getting Graped, tied up and beaten muahahahahaha! I am so gonna do the worst things to you! Woman: YES PLEASE! Man: MAAAAAAAAAAAN your not fun anymore... Moral: Its not grape if she wants it... and I guess grapists dont like that... remember that girls whenever someone is gonna rape you just say YES unless they yell surprise though... then its surprise sex.

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If you were my daughter id still be bathing you

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i wanna see your dick? i cant seem to find it...... sorry

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-Your father must be an alien because your out of this world -More like out of your league

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- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

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Your teeth remind me of a song Which one? Black and Yellow

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Can you leave your door unlocked and your underwear drawer open when you go to work?

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put I and U together. - Would you also change it so that I is an object, therefore making your previous sentence grammatically correct? And besides, I already organized the alphabet so that N and O are right next to each other.

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Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

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Shaved your beard, so I can see you're a woman.

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If your happy and you know it clap your hands!! What if I lost my hands in Nam while I was singing this song and a plane killed my friend causing me to ct off both of my hands?

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Me: Hey lady, you are so fucking hot I want to... Lady: FUCK ME PLEASE ME SO HORNY! Moral: One can always dream... *yawn* Zzzzzzzmooth...

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It's not Rapee If you yell surprise!

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Are you an angel? 'Cause you're the only ten I see.

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McDonald's isn't the only thing that is super-sized...

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Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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