BOY: Are you a chicken? GIRL: Why? BOY: Because I'll like you to lay on my eggs all day...

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Man: May I please sit next to you for a brief moment? Woman: Sure :), you`re such a gentleman :). Man: Would you care for a bit of violent rapage in you`re anus?

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are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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Girl: Wanna see my dick? Man: WHAT? Moral: This actually started out as me just mixing up the girl and guy part...

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Every kiss begins with K ;) Yeah to bad ugly begins with U

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Are you from hogwarts, because I really want to put my basilisk into your chamber of secrets

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- I put the STD in STUD, all I need is U - ...

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I scream, You scream, The Police come, It's Awkward...

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-Hey babe, if you were homework, I'd do you on my couch, my table, and my bed. -Yeah? You just failed.

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Hey girl, you must have fallen from heaven, because you're so old you should have died already and so ugly that they must have kicked you out as soon as you got there.

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so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

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Husband: I will always get breakfast and newspapers in bed AT 5:30 baby, but not wake me when you wake up at 4:30

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Good news: you'll never-ever-ever have a zit again. Bad news: because there's no more space for it to pop out.

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Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

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-I love you.

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- I can make your bed rock. - Oh yeah? An earthquake can too..

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So, you're a girl, huh?

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You're so hot, you should wear a burkha over your face.

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your beauty surpasses that of the greek goddess aphrodite.

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girl - leave! boy - no girl - leave now! boy - i cant girl - why boy - i broke my foot girl - oh

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Baby if you were homework, I would do you all the time

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Low confidence edition: Woman: Hi there cutie, you new here? Guy: Lady, believe me I am out of your league. Woman: You look really nice and I was wondering if... Guy: No really, believe me, I am boring and a virgin, but my mom says I am nice, but pfft no, just stop wasting your time and giving me false allusions please... Moral: Someone kill that faggot!

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Are you a computer technician? Because you turn my hardware into software.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!