Are you from Tennessee? Because I have a lot of family that lives there, maybe we're related.

M: If life had Alt + F4, I would close your clothes. F: Really? I would close YOU down!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

Man enters bar: Man: I AM MORAL MAN! My spear shall cut down the zealots, and my shield shall block (yeah you wish) be used as a additional weapon to push people down so I can thrust my spear even deeper into their hatred filled hearts! Woman: WOW! Moral: This pickup line wont work of course... not for you you aren`t the one and only EPIC: MORAL MAN! ;) Aka Epic man to those that still fail to understand that my morals are morals for a new order! No more religious wars, no more pedophiles, no more hatecrime... stand by me, and I shall not only speak for you, but also fight for you!

Guy: Hey, cutie! What's your name? Girl: JOHN CENA.

What's a good comeback if a guy asked me "Bring me a sandwich"?? -COmeback with the goddamn sandwich

Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

-Girl I'd go through anything for you. -Good than go through a blender!

A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

Guy : Hey, there's a party in my pants. Wanna join? ;] Girl : Can't, I'm allergic to crabs.

Hey girl, I heard you are a lesbian! So which part of lesbia are you from? Moral: Geography is overrated, he got laid.

-hey baby whats your sign? -no parking anytime

I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

Man: did you just fart cuz you blew me away! Woman: actually I did, sorry if it smells I had enchiladas for lunch.

"Can I buy you a drink or do I have to have sex with you first?"

There's a reason why they call my penis the Bunker Buster.

Do you have sunburn, or are you always this hot? It's sunburn.

Real life: Me at age 17 or something after sex... Me: Thank you! The girl gives me an ugly look left and I never saw her again (whatever she was fugly) Moral: For real guys, never EVER thank a girl for sex!

He:*walks over* She: What is it now? He:*Unzips fly.* She : OH DEAR CHRIST NO

- I can make your wildest dreams come true. - I know. I had this nightmare some creep wouldn't leave me alone...

Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I would be in prison.

If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put "U" and "I" as far apart as possible.

men: Do you ride horses, because I'd let you ride me all night!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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