- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

you look like my mother

Is that a keg in your pants? Cause I'd like to tap that ass.

The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

From 1 to America how free are your tonight? North Korea

Did you just fart coz you're blowing me away!

why can't a black person play baseball because the steal bases

Her: Guess what? Him: What? Her Yo Mama! Him: Is she that slut i did last night?

I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

M: If life had Alt + F4, I would close your clothes. F: Really? I would close YOU down!

- You must be a parking ticket cause you have fine written all over you - You must be a wellfare check then.

F: I AM SO DRUNK AND HORNY I COULD FUCK ANYONE M: Hey, wanna fuck? F: I SAID ANYONE.. Not anything... Heck I got standards! Moral: Heck she has standards! Her dog is someone!

Tenth year anniversary Marriage. So what was your name again? Annoying Bitch? Old Hag? I forgot...

Man: (Ugh worst food ever). Girl: U like it? Man: I love it girl! Girl: Aww, I am gonna make this every day ever! Moral: Hey, if she got big tits, then keep lying.

Male: Are you from Tennessee? Female: Why? Male: Cus you look like an inbred hick

Man: Wanna hear a joke about my Cck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my Pssy, oh wait you'll never get it Man: It's ok, it was probably too dirty for me anyways.

-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

Does this rag smell like chloroform?

Man- How much do 2 polar bears weigh? Woman- I don't know? Man- Enough to break the ice, heyy.(;

Man: Hey, want to go back to my apartment and engage in intercourse? Woman: No

If you're still here when I get drunk, this is your lucky night.

Man: "Let's play Titanic. You'll be the Titanic, and I'll be the iceberg making you go down." Woman: "That would be a massive disaster."

Nice hair, can I pull it?

-Because you are not very attractive I figure you have low self-esteem. I will prey on your poor self-image for short-term sexual gratification. Also, you are really drunk. -OK.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book