Online Desperate Asians.com Man: Wow you are a cute asian girl! Where are you from? Girl: Thanks my name Aoi is I am from Japan, you look like nice older man! Man: Japan? Awesome! Remember when we nuked the hell out of your country? Happy days! SLAP A JAP! *Connection discontinued* Man: Eh really sorry, I just get nervous when I meet girls especially the cutest ones... Man: hello?

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Do you believe in angels? Cool, what about goblins?

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Man: (puts on a stern face and mans up) Hey you random hoe, wanna have sex? Woman: Sigh... sure why not... at least you dont play games. Man: WHAT? IT WORKED? IT WORKEEEEED?! OMG truCKINg goD wOooooot wooooooot hell I aM gonna get laid tonight it finally worked yaehaieHeiAHEIHAIEHIAHE Wootowtowot I AM GONNA LOSE MY VIRGI... Woman: never mind, you are too noisy... Moral: Desperation... harder to hide than you think..

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he got me some KY jelly for valentines day saying it was going to make me the happiest woman in the world he was right one squirt of that stuff on my doorknob and he couldn't get in no matter how hard he tried

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Shall I compare you to a summer's day? Damn you're hot!

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He - Hey Dreamboat! She - *turns around He - No you, shipwreck

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Man: Your body is a temple! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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"Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes." "They always say that before they go to sleep."

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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This one is for the ladies: Man: If I could put 6 and 9 on my calculator we would have the greatest time ever ;) Woman: If you did that id just put 911 on my cellphone.

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Guy: want to hear a joke about my penis. don't worry, it's too long Girl: want to hear a joke about my vagina. don't worry, you won't get it

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-So, what are you doing later? -Not you.

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Hey baby, my name is Richard Gozinia. But my friends call me Dick. Dick Gozinia.

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Q: What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? A: My zipper.

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Hey you must be Jabba the slut from Starwars... why are you crying? Moral: Moral is half the battle

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-how much do i have to pay you to **** me? -how much do i get for taking you back to the zoo?

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If i'd ask you if you want to f*ck me, would your answer be the same as to this question?

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Guy: Are you an angel? Girl: Wait till I die, i'll be one.

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GET INTO DA CHOPPAH! Moral: IM LIEUTENANT JOHN KIMBLE! I HAVE A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS YOU HAVE TO ANSWER IMMEDIATELY! Whoos your daddy? YOU STAP IT! YOU IDIEOUT!

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-Do you come here often? -Yeah, but now that you're here, I think I'll find another bar.

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Guy: Girl, I wish you were a car door, cause I'd slam you all night Girl: Well I have a car, how about I run you over with it instead?

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Are you a magnet because I'm attracted to you No, but I am trained in several martial art, so get the heck away from me

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So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

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Would you like to be the lone mother of my children?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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