This tux is rented by the hour, are you?

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Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

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Is someone following you? Cuz ive been seeing people behind your back.

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- Hey, I have 40 minutes to live and need to feel the touch of a woman to live. -I'm a dude.

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-Girl I'd go through anything for you. -Good than go through a blender!

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Man: "Did you fall from heaven? 'Cause it looks like you landed on your face"

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I hope you want kids, cause i've left my condoms at my girlfriends place.

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Im gonna rape you..

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Boy: So...Um...How's life? Girl: Great, until you came along.

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Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet... that would be nice..

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Hey wanna have sex and get married! ......... sorry.......

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What happens if an Internet troll has a heart attack Doesn't matter nobody will care

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What do u get when u mix a black a guy and an octopus The best dam cotton pickin machine you'll ever see!

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Guy: Have you ever seen a rhinoceros? Girl:No. Why? Guy: So you don't have a mirror in your house?

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You're a bit heavier but i think I can fit you in a barrel.

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your boobs are bigger than my nose

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-I work for the FBI -Oh I work for the CIA, maybe we'll see each other at a meeting -Yeah I'm in the Female Body Inspector division -I'm in the Can the Idiot Absent himself division

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My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm but I accidentally gave her the glue stick, she is still not talking to me.

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Me noob days again: She: So, you like it here sweetheart? Me: Excuse me, why the hell are you rubbing my leg? She: Would you prefer I rub something else? Me: What the hell am I doing here anyways Duh! Then I sober up at home... And ran towards the shower, its really not that easy to drown yourself to death in a shower is it?

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Me during the noob days at a bar: Me: So this is fun, want to go to my place and watch The Matrix trilogy all night or something? She: Naaah, I already watched them, but I am sure we can watch something else all night right? Me: Nah, you see I just moved in, and I don't have any other movies, so yeah nice meeting you though! *facepalm*

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him: your like the sun in the morning. her: that so sweet! him: Your very big and i can even stare at you for more then 2 secondes.

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- hey id like my order for you - ok we put extra punch with it these days

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I just killed my wife. What should I do?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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