- Anti-Pickup Line

Man: Your body is a temple! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

Man - Hey you're kinda pretty! Woman - Um thanks... Man - Whoa slow down! I said kinda.

-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

If I had chloroform and a rag, you'd be waking up in a closet tomorrow.

If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

Hey girl! Faggot.

That outfit looks fantastic on you... ..it would look even better in an evidence bag

Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

Man: "Are you a parking ticket? 'Cos you have fine written all over you!" Woman: "Are you an ahole? 'Cos you're hairy and you smell like st!"

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Do you work at Subway? Cuz you just gave me a footlong

Man: Your body is a tempe! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

Are you from Wales, because...well...

Man: You like nice guys? ;) Woman: No. Man: bitchslap get down on you`re knees and suck me bitch!

HONEY! I SEE MEDUSA!!!!!!!!!!! oh wait, it was just you

Guy enters a bar: Guy: I have some really bad self-esteem and would really apreciate if someone would give me a chance and... Gorgeous woman: Hey, I would love to get to know you, and maybe take you home and... Guy: WHAT? THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN TO ME! I CANT HANDLE IT! HEEEEEEEEEEELP! (Runs out of bar screaming)

Big Black Guy: Yo, whats your name there sexy? My name is Tyrone Bigs Dicks, but my NBA teammates call me Mr.BigDingDong, I play for the HUGE Chicago BIGC0cks if I seem familiar to you ;),... Woman: Wow, awesome ;) and why do they call you that? Big Black Guy:Sigh... I was afraid you would ask... I actually got no idea... But I do not think there are any Big HUGE hard facts... Woman: :/ Big Black Guy: Where you going? Hey! Moral: Lol cannot stop laughing myself! "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! WE PRESENT TO YOU THE HUGE CHICAGO BIGC0CKS!

Id catch a grenade for ya, but you won't do the same

My penis becomes hard and hard when I see your mom, but weak when I see you.

You don't sweat much for a fat girl, do ya?

Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Yeah sure, ill just go grab my gag and handcuffs. Male: ...

Is that a mirror in your pocket? Use it next time you put your d**n make-up on.

Are you cute? Because lets go get taco bell.

What did you do to Kelly? Why? Because she said you did her good(; What? Cuz' I heard you did that goood thing(; When? Last night on the bed, 3am(;

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!