If you were attacked by a bear with chainsaw arms i hope it stays away from your face, because I think you're cute.

can i just touch your face for like, a couple seconds.

Man and girl talking: Girl: ARE YOU GETTING A HARDON? Man: You think I am a pervert or something? Of course not! Its just the hamster I keep between my ballsack!

At a bar (another real life one): Man: You sort of look like a woman from a certain angle... I am so drunk I can pretend you are a woman all night long! ????: I AM A WOMAN! Man: How can we fix this so you can come home with me? Moral: Becoming unpopular was my goal, but third next to Justin Beiber? Maybe I overdid this a bit...

Were your parents chemists? cuz you look like TEST TUBE BABY :D

Stories from real life part whatever: Me as a twelve year old: Yeah I am incredibly experienced with girls, I mean I know I look very young for a eighteen year old man, but I consider it a advantage of mine... Seventeen year old girl: Really? You are eighteen? Me: Of course, besides II have had intercourse hundred of times, mostly with married women, I enjoy being their "guilty pleasure" Girl: I bet you haven't seen boobs like these though! *shows me boobs* Me: OMG! HOLY SHIT REAL BEEWBS! OMG HOLY CRAP THEY LOOK INCREDIBLE HOLY SHIT EVERYONE I JUST SAW REAL LIFE TITS! I am a winner! Last thing I remember was getting slapped several times and getting spit on, I was too damn happy to give a damn, I was victory. Moral: had you asked me if it worked by then id say "hell yes!", today I doubt it worked as well as it could have...

H3LL0 Girls, You need some THERAPEY? Call Nero The Moralman For A qualified TheRapist. The number? You wont get it, so then you will go mad with lust and need therapey Moral: Ooooh... I says ANTI Pickup line... Whats that? More Moral: Nothing is immoral! Everything is Moral MORAL MAN!

Do you know karate? Because I'd like to kick you in the face.

Your body would look good in my trunk.

i would traval the earth for you. well then im going to the moon.

You are the personification of beauty. ,..Wanna Shag?

Hello, it's nice to meet you.

Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

-So, you wanna...? -I'm on my period.

showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

Guy- Hey, wanna come back to my place? Girl- Umm... I don't think 2 people can fit in that box...

Hey girl, I May not be Fred Flinstone but I can make your bed rock! ;)

-So, what are you doing later? -Not you.

Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rapee? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

- Did it hurt? - What? - When you were catapaulted from the firey bowels of Hell?

did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

*is your name angel cuz that's all i see? *is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

Nice hair, can I pull it?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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