Did it hurt when you fell from heaven and banged every guy on the way down?

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Hey baby, you like sea food? Because I've got crabs!

thumb_up thumb_down +275

man-hey baby you wanna go somewhere girl-no thanks hells over there

thumb_up thumb_down -81

Guy: what do this pickup line and your face have in common? Girl: what? Guy: they are both poorly constructed.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red violets are blue i got a gun get in the van!

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Did the lord take the thunder from the skies, and put it in your thighs?

thumb_up thumb_down +210

Hey, you look like a hooker I fondled in Las Vegas

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Hey, nice shoes..... Wanna F***?

thumb_up thumb_down +252

-If I take you home, will you iron my clothes and make me a sandwich?

thumb_up thumb_down +147

BOY-i love you GIRL-(sneezes) sorry im allergic to bullshit

thumb_up thumb_down +137

Man: Wanna hear a joke about my C*ck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my P*ssy, oh wait you'll never get it

thumb_up thumb_down +678

whats up ho

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Damn, girl, you're hot... You look just like my mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +128

guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

thumb_up thumb_down +22

ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Do you have an STD? No. DO you want one??

thumb_up thumb_down -155

-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' together. -If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would take 'U' out entirely.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

Can I have this dance? Sure just give me a minute to load my gun

thumb_up thumb_down +123

- hey ;) - hey, yourself. - if i wanted my comeback, i would've wiped it off your mom's face.

thumb_up thumb_down +133

rohypnol. rape drug

thumb_up thumb_down -96

Man: You like nice guys? ;) Woman: No. Man: *bitchslap* get down on you`re knees and suck me bitch!

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Man: So, what's your sign? Woman: Out to lunch. Back whenever!

thumb_up thumb_down -110

Male: Did you get your tickes to the barbercue? Female: What barbercue? Male: The barbercue where i put my meat on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +130

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!