Are you from tennessee? Because your inbred and retarted.

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Excuse me, does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Hey baby. Do you drive a slug bug on a rainbow? If so, I'll drive.

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that shirt looks nice on you, it would look better on the floor

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- Does this napkin smell like chloroform to you? There is no response because she passed out from it and he leaves in order to void suspicion.

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Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa what I don't want for Christmas?

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Male: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Female: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore

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Guy: I got you a gift. It's a Necklace. Girl: Awww thats so nice. Guy: BAZINGA Its my dick.

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-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you.

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So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

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You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

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Mario: Its a me Mario! Woman: Uhuh... Mario: Its a me Mario? Woman: Yeah you got a point? Mario: Okey dokey! Woman: So? Mario: Letsa go! Woman: Well okay, I mean *chews bubblegum* at least I know who you are and stuff... Moral: I once saw a red mushroom come out of a question block, so I just touch it with my Richard and... ...Wait ill take the green one, just in case, I good with what I have...

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I hate you already.

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- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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Are you a magnet, because i'm attracted to you. Yes, i am. So unless you want to have sex with metal, then i suggest you leave.

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Famous male actors guide on pick-up. 1. Enter Disco. 2. Say hello out loud. 3. By this point you`re screwed... literally.

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roses are red violets are blue i have a knife get in the van

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You're place or mine? Both, you go to yours and I go to mine.

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MAN: Did it hurt? WOMAN: Did what hurt? MAN: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? WOMAN: Did it hurt when you were dropped as a baby?

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My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

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You look... clean

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-Want my number? -I already know it. It's 1. -Phone numbers have more then one digit... -Oh, I thought we were referring to your IQ level...my bad.

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Did you fall from heaven because you landed on my wind shield some how

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- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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