Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

- Hey, baby, are your parents retarded because you're pretty special.

wow youre really pretty... just kidding youre fat

sex me.

Is there a mirror in your pants? If so, you should shove it up your ass, it would probably make you look better.

fancy going halves on a bastard?

http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

girl: i like you boy with downs: i liek trains

Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

HIM: Where have you been all my life? HER: I don't think I was born the first half of it

Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

Didnt I just meet you at world of warcraft? My nickname is desperaterapist838493

Im gonna rape you..

Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?

Hey, do you want to dance? No.

-words can't describe how beautiful you are. -aaaawwwwwwww. -but numbers can. 3/10. -fffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-

If you were a booger i'd pick you first. -that, is fucking disgusting.

So when' the baby due?

You like my boobies ;) Girl: I said no you disgusting fat bastard! Moral: What fucking kind of MOTHERFUCKING MORAL are you expecting to find here?!?

Grapist: I bet you like getting Graped, tied up and beaten muahahahahaha! I am so gonna do the worst things to you! Woman: YES PLEASE! Man: MAAAAAAAAAAAN your not fun anymore... Moral: Its not grape if she wants it... and I guess grapists dont like that... remember that girls whenever someone is gonna rape you just say YES unless they yell surprise though... then its surprise sex.

Man: Hey baby, I hear you are lesbian, that sounds really sexy! ;) Woman: Take the damn hint asshole! I am a lesbian! Man: Hey! Woah! Relax! I already know where you come from, say, are all girls in Lesbia this hostile? Moral: They are friendlier in south Lesbia...

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!