Are you a dinosaur? Because you look like you got hit by an asteroid.

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-Go on don't be shy, Ask me out. -Okay Go out.

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Your father must have been a theif, because you look like a pikiey

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Shy-guy: Hey uh, girl, we have been on like 40 dates, what do you um... You know say we go to my place for once and have some drinks? Shy-girl: Eh, well su-sure I mean its been over forty dates, but ill just take coffee if its oka... Shy-guy: OMG YOU DAMN EASY SKANK! HOLY SHIT YOU WHERE GONNA GIVE IT ALL WHERE YOU NOT? LOL NO TIME FOR DESPERATE BlTCHES! Moral: Not to be confused with the slightly less popular Nintendo character Shy Guy

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are you from tennessee? because your license plate said it.

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Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa what I don't want for Christmas?

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-Want my number? -I already know it. It's 1. -Phone numbers have more then one digit... -Oh, I thought we were referring to your IQ level...my bad.

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Superman: I bet I can bang you faster than the speed of light! Woman: OOOOH! OK DO IT! Superman... uh... I already did it 30 times already... "pant" "pant" Woman: uh... really? Uh... was I suppose to feel anythi... Moral: Since when has fast sex been good sex?

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Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

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Hey baby, are you Star Trek? Because I watch you every night in the darkness.

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GEDDINTHEFRIGGENCAR

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Man: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? Woman: Did it hurt when they kicked-- *sound of gun clicking* Woman: Thanks!

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i'm a doctor.... maybe i can fix that thing you call a face

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A blond, a brunette and a black haired girl are all stuck on an island....stupid women.

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Man; Wanna play the rape game? Girl; No Man; That's the spirit

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Famous male actors guide on pick-up. 1. Enter Disco. 2. Say hello out loud. 3. By this point you`re screwed... literally.

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On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

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You dont need makeup, plastic surgery is really cheap nowadays!

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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Man: Oh crap I don't have a condom Woman: Don't worry I have one

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Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

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Me. Would you like me to get you a ring for valentines day? Girlfriend: Nothing would make me happier! So I got her nothing...

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Are u in the army cause u make my private stand at attention.

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He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!