Man: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? Woman: Did it hurt when they kicked-- *sound of gun clicking* Woman: Thanks!

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Want to get a pizza and fuck? What you don't like pizza?

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Hey, girl. Looking for a stud? Cuz I've got the STD and all I need is U

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are you from tennessee? because your license plate said it.

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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*At a concert* guy- hey if you were that drum set, i'd bang you on that stage all night

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You must be a parking ticket. Because you are dressed like i'd have to pay.

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Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

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Sugar-free sugar cookies

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Guy:Are you wearing space pants, cause that ass is out of this world! Girl:No, they're baseball pants, cuz this ass is out of your league.

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Famous male actors guide on pick-up. 1. Enter Disco. 2. Say hello out loud. 3. By this point you`re screwed... literally.

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Hey you've got the most beautiful f*cked up teeth I've ever seen.

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You want to sleep with me and i want to sleep with you. I'm at least half right.

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Super man and Lois lane doing it... Supes: WOMAN I AM SO uh.. tHORNY that I want to thrust as hard as I can and... Lois: YAAAAAAAAAAARGH! Supes: Oh noes! R.I.P Lois Lane... Ripped In Pieces Indeed... Moral: Hey at least moral man can get laid... (a moral man fake... well actually original)

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-Wanna go to my place? -Actually, I was gonna ask you the same question. -Really? Where do you live? -In a sexual harassment class.

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Hey baby wana come over for dinner? Sure whats cookin? Your dead body after I kill ur ugly face derrp

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Did you just fart? Cause it smells like shit in here

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Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

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At a bar (how creative): Man: I bet you look beautiful behind those tits... Woman: WHAT DO YOU MEAN DONKEYHOLE!?!?!?! Man: Uh... well I mean I really cant see your face and... Moral: Silicone tits are nice too... in MODERATION FFS!

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Guy:My tummy hurts Girl: Oh!! Are you pregnant ? Guy: Yeah!!! With a baby elephant!! Girl:WHAT!!!! Guy: Yeah!! Wanna see its trunk

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!