guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

Hello my name is Pogo. Would you like to jump on my stick?

Girl: Hi honey, wanna see a magic trick? Boy: Sure, why not? Girl -POOF- YOU'RE SINGLE!

Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

Guy: I got you a gift. It's a Necklace. Girl: Awww thats so nice. Guy: BAZINGA Its my dick.

If you were a booger i'd pick you first. -that, is fucking disgusting.

Violets are blue. Roses are red. Your window was open. I'm under your bed.

male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

jack sanders

Me: Hey lady, you are so fucking hot I want to... Lady: FUCK ME PLEASE ME SO HORNY! Moral: One can always dream... *yawn* Zzzzzzzmooth...

I walked into the pub last night with a date and said to the barman, "I'll have a pint of Guinness." My date immediately looked at me and said, "Aren't you forgetting something?" "Of course, how rude of me." I said, "I'll have a pint of Guinness PLEASE."

-Roses are red, violets are... -SHOW ME YOUR TITS

At a bar: Hello! Moral: Keep the damn lines short! (A moral man original, not to be confused with the exploding bar or whoever put morals in their sstories, feel free to do so though! I mean anyone can see from the quality whose are mine ;)

Whenever I look at stars I think of you... Because your only beatiful from a distance.

-Hey babe, if you were homework, I'd do you on my couch, my table, and my bed. -Yeah? You just failed.

I really should start saying "congratulations" instead of "are you keeping it?"

the word of the day is legs lets go to your house and spread the word

girl- how much does a polar bear weigh? girl- enough to break the-- boy- Are you talking about an adult polar bear? boy- then it's around 400-500 kg girl- blast!

Every breath you take Every move you make Every bond you break Every step you take I'll be watching you Every single day Every word you say Every game you play Every night you stay I'll be watching you

Are you from hogwarts, because I really want to put my basilisk into your chamber of secrets

You stole my heart..... Don't worry, i have three more back home in my freezer.

male: hey i like you can i have your number female: what number? male: your pin number i want your money

man: wanna know how i know we're going to f**k tonight? woman: how? man: cuz im stronger than you!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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