Hey baby, let me take you to heaven.

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Hey this is crazy and I just met you so here's the kitchen a sandwich maybe?

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male: hey i like you can i have your number female: what number? male: your pin number i want your money

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M:Hey baby you must be a GENERAL because your making my PRIVATES stand up F:Hmm, Your still a MAJOR disappointment See whaat i did tharrgh?

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So do you want tonight to be consensual or not?

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In a classy bar: KEEP IT CLASSY! Man: Hello there dear... your eyes sparkle like the sun itself... Woman: Oh... thank you random stranger, that is the most beautiful thing someone have ever said to me :D Man: Really? But you are gorgeous (the two proceed to have a long CLASSY conversation and laughing in a classy reserved matter and drinking classy champagne and whatever... and then: Man: Ahahaha yes that is indeed true... By the way... would you mind becoming the single lonely mother of my children? Moral: skipped most of school classes... class ... overrated...

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together -The order of the alphabet is arbitrary. It's not my fault that you kept U and I apart.

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My wife does not know it but every time we have sex I put a dollar aside to go toward her Christmas present. So far she is getting a cup of coffee.

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-Darling, I will never stop pursuing you. Even from the ends of the earth, I will follow you wherever you go. Really, I love you that much. -"Honey", I will call the police and have you thrown in jail for stalking me. Really, I hate you that much.

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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Well there's the exit, will you go out with me?

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-hey baby wanna get a drink? -no but i wanna get the heck away from you

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"Is this seat free?" "Yes, and if you sit on it, this seat will be free too"

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- I'm a weatherman, and I'm predicting 9 inches tonight ;) - Oh? Well weathermen aren't always accurate, so it's probably more like 3 inches.

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Girl: How come you never look at me when we make love? Guy: Your face is taking away the memory of your sister's.

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Hey do you like mansauce? Moral: MORAL KOOOOOOMBAAAAAAAAAAT!

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Me about four years ago: Girl: So what do you do? Me: I am an author. Girl: Cool! So like what do you write and stuff? Me: I am on my third book I am writing for Tom Clancy. Girl: Get outta here! You are so full of shit! This kinda happened a lot of times actually. ...Its true, then he died, now I am trying to rewrite the whole piece of crap into science fiction, yeah! Come sue me CLANCY! Do you think ANYBODY thought that you could write like 732 books a year? (Even though they where pieces of shit, I would know, mine are still the worst rated, but not worst selling because I dont know)

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- Is it hot in here, or is it just the broken A/C unit?

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"My mom won't be home for hours..."

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The word of today is "leg's",no whom are i kidding, bird is the word!

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"I prefer animals... but your so ugly you remind me of my dog"

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can i austrailian kiss you, its like a french kiss but down under

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- Lets get outta here and have some fun - If you got your fathers dick....no

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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