Guy: Hey, cutie! What's your name? Girl: JOHN CENA.

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Girl: Hey classy older man, wanna get to know me better? Man: Sigh... sorry lady I am the man that played Gandalf in that... shitty lords of something movie... Girl: so what? Man: Sigh... you know.. Gandalf the white and Gandalf the gay...? Girl: Huh? Man: Ever seen the X-men? Girl: Yeah... Man: ONE WORD: FAGNETO! Girl: uh.. okay.. "leaves". Ian McKellen: Sigh... should have come out of the closet sooner...

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Baby if you were homework, I would do you all the time

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Are you from Wales, because...well...

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On a scale from 1 to 10, can I get your number?

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I stole this pickup line from Antipickupline.com.

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You belong in heaven. So make sure you say hi to God for me.

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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Hey gorgeous what are you drinking? Cyanide.

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Boy- is that a mirror in your pants? Girl-? Boy-because i see my self in your pants Girl-oh this, this is a picture of crap!

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-So...wanna come back to my place? -I Dont Know If two people can fit in a box on the street.

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Hey wanna have sex and get married! ......... sorry.......

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Are you a speeding, aggressive driver? Because your running straight up my ass

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- if I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U next to Y, just why

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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You wanna go somewhere? Yeah, where? The Swingers Association.

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: What? Guy:When I drugged you, then dragged you all the way to my place and banged the hell out of your ass? I also managed to get my entire fist in and out of your ass several times. Moral: Wanna go out with me?

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I like my women like I like my coffee I drink Tea

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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F: I AM SO DRUNK AND HORNY I COULD FUCK ANYONE M: Hey, wanna fuck? F: I SAID ANYONE.. Not anything... Heck I got standards! Moral: Heck she has standards! Her dog is someone!

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How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'I' and 'U' together. Really? Cos' I like it just the way it is... With 'N' and 'O' together.

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Guy: wow! Why are you naked and on top of me? Girl: What are you talking about! We are at a bar! Guy: Oh sorry I am a psychic and keep getting flashes of the near future...

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- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!