- Anti-Pickup Line

male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

Not a pickup line, but sincerity: Look for somebody you like, it does not matter what in particular you love about this person, so lets put me as the guy in two examples. Me: Lovely scarf you got there. Woman: Here take it. Me: Wow. Its no typical me to be into women's clothing in fact I do not give a damn about clothing at all, so I ask my female friends to buy clothes for me to pick up what they think I look my best in, I mean what is wrong by looking good in the eyes of your girls eh? but I must really have loved that scarf, because it was no pick up failure, because in this example I sincerely loved that scarf... Now this one. Me: I love that scarf you got there. Woman: Sigh, take it and leave me alone. Me: Here, have it back, I do not like the scarf, I like how beautiful you make the scarf look, are you willing to give me a chance, to get to know the girl that can make this scarf so beautiful? You are female and resist me? That is okay, you do however give me the motivation to become a better person, so that you might give me another chance, sometime if we meet again, and if we do not, thank you for giving me so much already. Honesty Pros: No lies Cons: I am experienced with being myself P Lies: Pros: Hey a free scarf I pretend to like yay? Cons: If you have what it takes, why do you then have to lie? Then you are not only lying to her, but also to yourself. And if your lie works, how many lies will you have to keep creating, until the fear of failure rather than the peace and love, breaks your heart and hers? Moral: Sure you know now you lie about the scarf, about her shirt, about her wig, and you lose a lot... But if you had to lie about it, admit it or live in self denial: You lost nothing sir! You never had it in the first place

Why do cops eat donuts so much? Because they are delish

Mario: Its a me Mario! Woman: Uhuh... Mario: Its a me Mario? Woman: Yeah you got a point? Mario: Okey dokey! Woman: So? Mario: Letsa go! Woman: Well okay, I mean chews bubblegum at least I know who you are and stuff... Moral: I once saw a red mushroom come out of a question block, so I just touch it with my Richard and... ...Wait ill take the green one, just in case, I good with what I have...

haha

A man comes home from his doctor and tells his wife that he only has 12 hours to live so he asks his wife later that night if they can do it one last time she agrees but after an hour the man wakes his wife and says honey in a few hours I will be dead can we do it again please. So they do it again a few hours later the man wakes his wife again and says dearest since I'm going to die soon can we please? to this the wife says look honey tomorrow I have to get up you don't!

Roses are red, violets are blue. When I take a shit I think about you bitch flushes the toilet

Guy:I got stds! Wanna do it? Girl:what the f*** did u just say?guy:oh std ummmm save the dogs?uh ya that save the dogs I own a animal shelter! Girl:I'm not stupid guy: u sure? (Slap)

Man: Your so hot, i think heavens missing an angel Girl: ... Man: ... Girl: ... Girl 2: Sophie turn your hearing aid on Man: oooh.

Keep it classy! Man: Hello mylady may I be as rude as to say you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen? Girl: Oh, wow I mean such class! Man: Yes you see, I am only asking... You see, would you mind a bit of some violent rapage? Girl: How dare you! Man: Oh I mean not be rude mylady, just a bit of torture and some few stylish cuts with my fancy knife? Moral: Whatever you do, whatever you want, KEEP IT CLASSY!

"I'd like to get you out of those clothes. Really, they aren't very flattering. That color looks awful on you and those pants make you look fat."

Guy : your looking well! Girl: awh thanks Guy: You must have shaved this morning.....waaaaaay

The word of the day is legs. Lets go to your place and spread the word

-Your father must be an alien because your out of this world -More like out of your league

Girl, did it hurt when you got dragged up all the way from hell? Moral: The hell with morals!

A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

-"Hey babe, you gotta nice ass!" -"Yep, and it doesn't like a rude one staring at it."

You seem reasonably clean, which is always an important consideration for me when selecting a woman.

did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

-Good afternoon miss, would you care to try our new line of perfume? -Sure what's it called? -Chloroform...

- you're so fat! - I know you are, but what am I? -awwww, thanks man!!! -I didn't mean it like that!

Why did the chicken cross the road? -To get to the other side.

Your hair is really beautiful. Thanks. Can I make a wig out of it?

Boy- Didi it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until i saw you.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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