Man: Put your face over my fist as I say shinku Woman: Huh? Ok whatever.... SHOOOOOOOOOORYUKEEEEEEN!

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Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

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-You wanna get laid tonight? -You wanna never have sex again?

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Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

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Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

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He- You've got something on your ass. She- What? He- Oh never mind, it's just a period stain.

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Man: What did you say this horrible machine did look like? Woman: It was terrible it was like a man sized yellow and red robot that shoot lasers! After I refused its offer to come home with him he shoot lasers and destroyed my house... buah ;( ;( Man: That is terrible! Despicable! We have to do something about this! Such a beautiful supermodel should never go trough such a terrible atrocity! Woman: Buah... sigh... sniff... I know... but it was terrible! Man: so so my lady... you can come live with me in my giant mansion and we can have a couple of drinks to calm your nerves and relax... ;) Woman: Thank you Mr.Stark... Man: Oh Just call me Iron Ma... I mean Tony!

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4 out of 5 people enjoy being gangraped

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Women love it when you kiss their neck. Just not while they are driving and while you're in the back seat and when they don't know you...

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Is that a ladder in your tights or are you just a cheap whore?!

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“I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.” (Groucho Marx)

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girl, are you a christian? Sure... Do you believe in me? I dont even know you! Well, met God? No? You love him!

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Male: I'd give her one Female: I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last person on earth Male: I was rating you out of 10 you ugly bitch

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven and banged every guy on the way down?

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Hello im a thief and I'm here to steal your purse

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i would drag my balls through miles of broken glass, just to hear you fart through a walkey-talkey

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why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

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male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

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Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

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me- hey baby wanna hve sexual intercourse girl- sure because using the word intercourse in a sentence tunrs me on.

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A: Wanna go get some pizza and then have sex at my place?? B: No.. B: U don't like pizza? Some chinees then?

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Man: Wanna come home watch my REALLY big stamp collection? ;) ;) Girl: Sure ;) ;) At home: Man: Why are you taking your clothes off? Girl: Uh... nevermind... Moments later: Man: And this one is a rare misprint from 1980, and this one is actually quite common but.., Girl: Sigh... :(

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My therapist says I should meet new people.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!