Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

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No more morals? I read his crap for hours! Moral: ;( Bye man.

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why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

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I am Lucifer, my color is blue I already got my queen TO HELL WITH YOU! Moral: Know my name and fear it, I am now and forever.

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hey i know spanish french german russian and Punjabi. got a talented tongue ;)

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-Good afternoon miss, would you care to try our new line of perfume? -Sure what's it called? -Chloroform...

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-Heyyy there (; -Im lesbian.

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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Man enters bar and does a lot of magic tricks, all the prettiest women are extremely impressed: Girls: WOW! We would do anything to see more of that! Guy: Uh... damn I forgot what to do after this... Moral: Screw the game man, its a stupid book, just be your moronic self and someone will like you for the lovely disgusting moron that you are... by the way you lost the game :D

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man: may I impale you on my stake? woman: O.o (for goth girls)

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Hey bitch wanna fuck! SURE! Nah you too sleasy. Moral: And the masters of the universe.

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Hold me pint love i'm going for a dump.

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Man: Are you a beach? Cause I'm sure there's a lot of crabs crawling around down there

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Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

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GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

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Guy: If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together Girl: If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put F and U together

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Wanna come home to my star destroyer and play with my lightsaber? No? How about just a trip down the Enterprise bridge to have fun with my romulans?... if you know what I mean? ;) ;)

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are you a brush because you just swept me off my feet

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What happens when a drunk swedish man prank calls 911 from a local bar? The ambulance comes

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you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

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Hello im a thief and I'm here to steal your purse

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Can you leave your door unlocked and your underwear drawer open when you go to work?

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Do you why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!