On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

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Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

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- Yo baby can I have your number? - Sure! My number is one *sticks up middle finger*

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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man: may I impale you on my stake? woman: O.o (for goth girls)

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Guy: wow! Why are you naked and on top of me? Girl: What are you talking about! We are at a bar! Guy: Oh sorry I am a psychic and keep getting flashes of the near future...

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At a Bar for blacks... and whites... and everybody else... Man: I can last for hours in bed! Woman: *gets closer and whispers in his ear: Really? Man: OH YeeeeeaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH! Woman: Lets go to your place... Man: Meh, I am done. Moral: Oh YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Excuse me I need to go change clothes...

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Girl: You look so happy, I am glad this is working out. Freud: Maaaaan I was just thinking about fucking my mom! Moral: Sickman Fraud.

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How about you swing by my place so we can do some complex algebraic functions.

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GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

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Guy enters a bar: Guy: I have some really bad self-esteem and would really apreciate if someone would give me a chance and... Gorgeous woman: Hey, I would love to get to know you, and maybe take you home and... Guy: WHAT? THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN TO ME! I CANT HANDLE IT! HEEEEEEEEEEELP! (Runs out of bar screaming)

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with glue? My d***

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And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

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Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

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Man: Lust is a terrible thing! Woman: I agree. Man: So come home with me and help me get rid of it.

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You want to sleep with me and i want to sleep with you. I'm at least half right.

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you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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-Good afternoon miss, would you care to try our new line of perfume? -Sure what's it called? -Chloroform...

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HI, DO YOU KNOW WHY THEY CALL ME DOCTOR RABBIT THE HYMEN DESTROYER? Nero the clit collector: Actually this works pretty good, just wear a random rabbit costume, cut a hole where your CAWCK is, and make sure they are girls under twelve or below (because it kinda loses its meaning with little boys but fuck it anyways, yeah fuck it! FUCK IT TO THE LIMIT!) I work at a daycare center: Because I care.

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Hey big girl ;), why you alone? You ate all of your friends?

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http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

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In regard to the post below. I'm not even joking, one of my mates actually said that to a girl.

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Man: Wanna come to my place? Woman: Maybe if you take of the ski-mask and black clothing... Man: But then you'll ruin the surprise! :(

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I love a girl with a trimmed bush because it makes it easier to see into her window at night.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!