Batman enters a bar: Batman: Ladies... I am Batman... *everyone runs out screaming* Batman: *facepalm* Moral: Want to be feared? Well what did you expect? Who I am? Are you dense? Retarded or something? I am the goddamn Moral-Man!

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Damn gurl, are you a microwave? Cause for sure you are burning me hot.

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-Hey baby, what's yo sign? - U Turn

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Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together Female: I don't need to rearrange the alphabet, N and O are already together!

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Male: If you were a booger, I'd pick you first. Female: If you were an ass, I would kick you first.

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Hey baby, I wanna solve your equation with longggg devision! ;)

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You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

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He: Do you like aardvarks? She: No. He: Neither do I, I'm Harold...

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Guy: Hey, cutie! What's your name? Girl: JOHN CENA.

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You smell just like my mom...

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Are you from Tennessee? Youre the only 10 i see, and im 59. I bet we could 69 beautifully.

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your beauty surpasses that of the greek goddess aphrodite.

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-You wanna get laid tonight? -You wanna never have sex again?

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Pointless truth? Man: Hey, there is always a really slutty dressed woman at every bar with a cowboy hat, fake tits and really spread legs, why? Woman: To get ignored. Moral: SUUUUUUUUUUUUURE!

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Boy: does your face hurt Girl: No. Why Boy Because it sure is hurting me

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-Hey, do you have a cat? -Why do you ask? -Because I'd love to pet your pussy. -Well, that makes two of us.

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Man enters bar: Man: I AM MORAL MAN! My spear shall cut down the zealots, and my shield shall block (yeah you wish) be used as a additional weapon to push people down so I can thrust my spear even deeper into their hatred filled hearts! Woman: WOW! Moral: This pickup line wont work of course... not for you you aren`t the one and only EPIC: MORAL MAN! ;) Aka Epic man to those that still fail to understand that my morals are morals for a new order! No more religious wars, no more pedophiles, no more hatecrime... stand by me, and I shall not only speak for you, but also fight for you!

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Sigh... No I do not have a van... Just get in the plane!

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boy: my dick is 10 inches girl: mine's too

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-Isnt this the bus to Vermont? -No, its an pineapple without a flute. -Are you a bus driver? -No, im an umbrella!

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Hey you must be Jabba the slut from Starwars... why are you crying? Moral: Moral is half the battle

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"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

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Man - I know I don't look like much now, but I'm drinking milk. Woman - Not mine!

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Hey there little girl there is a party down my pants you want to come? Oh I'm sorry i don't speak Herpes.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!