-I heard you broke up :). -Yes, cookies to put in my ice cream!

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male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

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M. Excuse me Miss. You have seamen on the back of your jacket. W. Are you sure? It could just be Yoghurt. M. Most Definitely. I don't Cum Yoghurt.

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Mmm baby....I want you to stick your Gaberwalkie in my bandersnatch.. ;)

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guy: can i rape you? girl: No Guy: great that means any sex we have from now on is consensual, thanks

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Roses are red Violets are blue Go out with me Or you face'll be those colors, too!

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fancy going halves on a bastard?

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You stole my heart..... Don't worry, i have three more back home in my freezer.

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Sigh... No I do not have a van... Just get in the plane!

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Batman bravely leaps in front of the Robin: Bats: WATCH OUT FOR THAT GAY-RAY! *Bats suddenly grabs Robin and starts making out with him* Bats: I am sorry, I cannot stop it... I... Robin: I am underage so maybe it was a pedo-ray or something... Joker: What gay ray? What pedo ray? It was suppose to disintegrate you! But whatever, I win. Moral: It was a looong trip back home.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car I want to rape you

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-If I take you home, will you iron my clothes and make me a sandwich?

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M: On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight? F: North Korea

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Man: Hey whore! I got a job for you! A blow-Job... get it? HAR HAR HARR! Woman: Wtf? Man: Just a joke whore... wanna come to my place?

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the most beatiful woman I have ever seen, so could you move out the way please

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Hey can I have your number? No.

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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Your father must have been a theif, because you look like a pikiey

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If you go out with me there might be some smegma in it for you.

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Hey :) Hi Do you like me? :) No :'( You never asked if i loved you... Awhhhh do you love me :) No

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Have you been followed? 'Cuz i've been seeing people behind your back.

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At a huge bar only known as Castlevania... Woman: Get lost loser! Why would I wont pay you "tribute" you pervert! Man: It was not by my hand that I am once again given flesh.... I was called here by humans who wish to pay me tribute! Woman: What do you mean? You are totally insane and make no sense at all! Man: Perhaps the same could be said of ALL religions.,, Woman: You are quite the nutjob man... Man: What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets! But enough talk... Have at you! Woman: EEEK! Man: But what is this? Did I just attack a woman wearing a cross? Is your last name Belmont? Woman: Yeah So? Is there a problem with my HOLY CROSS! *Man on fire*: WHAT? THIS CANNOT BE! ARGH!!!!!!! Moral: Die monster! You don't belong in this world!

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I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

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Man: So you will come home with me later? Girl: Sure! Man: Great then ill just go find more women I can bang later in the meantime... Moral: Depending of the kind of woman, this is of no consequence...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!