Female: Hey do you wann- Male: You got a purty mouth

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Man: HEY BITCH! LETS HAVE SEX! Damn ugly woman: OKAY! Next day... Man: Damn that was some nice sex, too bad the bitch was damn ugly though, even trough the beer googles... I wonder where she is... "damn ugly woman": woof woof! Bark bark! Moral: Do you see any moral in this immoral piece of shit? (Ps if you are stupid, the bitch was actually a dog... get it?)

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- Can I buy you a drink? - Yes, providing you f**k off immediately afterwards and I never have the misfortune to see or smell you ever again.

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Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

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Is that a keg in your pants? Cause I'd like to tap that ass.

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Male: I'd give her one Female: I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last person on earth Male: I was rating you out of 10 you ugly bitch

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Man: Hey, want to go back to my apartment and engage in intercourse? Woman: No

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rapee? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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Man: Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play R-a-p-e? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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How about you swing by my place so we can do some complex algebraic functions.

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Your eyes are the color of my toilet water.

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-So, you wanna...? -I'm on my period.

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hey baby do you fart? (much embaressed she awser)yeah,why? i knew that was a lie when they said that pretty girls don't fart

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Man: Hey, I've been kinda watching you through the night and I'd really be mad if I didn't talk to you tonight. So um, do you want to grab a bite to eat sometime or something? Woman: I'm married but you seem like a nice guy so yea... yea, I'd like that alot.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, id put my dick in your mouth.

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You must have a large mass because i am highly attracted to you

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Boy : Gurle: hi

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Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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I want you to come over, so we can go in my room, turn off the lights, go under the covers, and ill show you my glow in the dark watch..just kidding my penis.

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Him: What's it like in Hell? Her: Why are you asking me that? Him: Because you're the devil and I know where the f*ck you came from; I can see you're horny.

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- hey id like my order for you - ok we put extra punch with it these days

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At a bar: Hello! Moral: Keep the damn lines short! (A moral man original, not to be confused with the exploding bar or whoever put morals in their sstories, feel free to do so though! I mean anyone can see from the quality whose are mine ;)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!