MAN- You're trying to imagine me naked aren't you? WOMAN- No. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

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Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

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Man: Hey sexy girl there... Whats your name? Cena: I am John Cena! I can rap because you can eat.. uh crap... wait I need some allsholes to write some rad lyrics for me here...

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Do you want to see something swell?

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Can I have this dance? Sure just give me a minute to load my gun

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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Does the carpet match the drapes? -Do I look bald?

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Guy: Hey, cutie! What's your name? Girl: JOHN CENA.

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Male: Baby, I am God's gift to this earth! Female: Well, if I take a receipt up to Heaven, can I exchange you for someone better?

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I heard this one in real life in Spain, pretty good one: Man: Please marry me! I am nothing without you! Woman: If you are worth nothing then why should I want you? Man: Uh... Moral: Its a great honor having a dedicated group of followers making sure my comments always have red thumbs, thanks to this my sociology studies are complete. My thanks to every azzhole out there.

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I have a twin bed...we should have a threesome;)))

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Fear not moral man is back, in a moment of weakness I let myself go... let us put it this way... some like me, some hate me, that is what happens when people such as I speak their opinion. And if someday the entire world wants to destroy Moral Man... Moral Man will unleash doomsday! Moral: I am back, like me, hate me, you can still ignore me... but until I get some sleep and can start working out again (icy weather is not for bicycling is it?) Then Moral Man stands... Ps: Hey, thanks there below, my most thumbed up comments had minus 5 and such, so I got kinda down since I thought the internet too needed someone that speaks his mind. More Morals: But then I remembered I do this to entertain myself, and that you downvoters can all go screw yourselves! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAN! MORAL MAAAAAAAAN! Action figures in store now!

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Male: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Female: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore

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“I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.” (Groucho Marx)

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Hi, GET IN THE VAN, Drink this, Don't Scream whisper* "does ur body fit in my trunk?"

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MAN: Did it hurt? WOMAN: Did what hurt? MAN: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? WOMAN: Did it hurt when you were dropped as a baby?

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Male- You have 206 bones in your body, You want another ?

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Girl: Hey you cutypie! want to ride my newest pimpmobile and get drunk and have unprotected sex? Man: Gee that was mighty brave of you, teehee.. Maybe though, but cant we just get to know each other a bit first? ;) I mean I am a partygirl bu.. Girl: ...Uh, something feels wrong here. Man: Cut! I think we picked up each other scripts... Moral: About mother fucking time someone noticed something! This is anti-pickupline enough for me...

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Is your dad a terrorist?? 'Cause you're a sex bomb.

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-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down

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hey wanna come back to my house, and help me kill my dog?

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Do you work at Subway, because you're giving me a footlong. No actually, I once had a job at a local Quizno's Sub Shop. However a tragic fire killed several employees and customers at this very location. I survived, but lost have permanent Third-Degree burns across my body. My life is ruined, prick.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'U' and 'I' together. - No, it's okay. 'N' and 'O' are already together.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!