If i could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'I' and 'U' together. Really? Cos' I like it just the way it is... With 'N' and 'O' together.

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Online Desperate Asians.com Man: Wow you are a cute asian girl! Where are you from? Girl: Thanks my name Aoi is I am from Japan, you look like nice older man! Man: Japan? Awesome! Remember when we nuked the hell out of your country? Happy days! SLAP A JAP! *Connection discontinued* Man: Eh really sorry, I just get nervous when I meet girls especially the cutest ones... Man: hello?

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Man:Hey, do you know what chloroform smells like? Woman:No. Man:Well, you're about to find out.

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Man - How was your trip from heaven? Woman - Great... until now.

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And then one day God invented man, the worlds third most useless invention. Moral: I cant stop laughing, thank you everybody I actually got top grades in sociology studies for this moral man crap XD

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GEDDINTHEFRIGGENCAR

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What do u get when u mix a black a guy and an octopus The best dam cotton pickin machine you'll ever see!

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*Boy looks at cloth* -Does this smell like chlorophorm?

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Guy: Have you ever seen a rhinoceros? Girl:No. Why? Guy: So you don't have a mirror in your house?

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Man: How much does a polar bear weight? Girl: No idea... Man: Me either... By the way! Did you hear of the great blahblahblahblah that did blahalblahblah! Moral: Breaking the ice... easier than it seems...

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Man: Well... you seem female enough at least... wanna come home? Woman?: Uh... well... okay ;) But I am a man thought ;) Man: That is disgusting! I am so ashamed! Not Woman: Oh, well sorry :(.. Man: So... as I said you SEEM female enough so wanna come home? The other man: :D I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU ASKED ME! ITS SO BEAUTIFUL... so well... NO! Man: This is not getting anywhere is it? Author. NO!

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Little guy: I also beat Mike Tyson with my fists! Woman: Meh, from what I heard you beat some nobody named Mr.Dream! Little guy: Damn you Nintendo! Moral: He sure was not a big mac... more like a little ma.. baaaah you wont get it anyways!....

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She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right." I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."

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How can you tell if an elephant has been in your fridge? Broken fridge.

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Damn girl! You`re fat and ugly! its ok though, cuz Im desperate!

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-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Not as much as my dick.

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Woman: You've got the body of a god, too bad that it's Buddha... Man: You've got the face of a Princess, too bad that it's Diana.

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Female: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Male: I'm actually a broom in disguise.

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You're one-in-a-million. That means there is roughly 7,000 people exactly like you in the world.

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That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

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girl - leave! boy - no girl - leave now! boy - i cant girl - why boy - i broke my foot girl - oh

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You have lovely eyes. They'll look better in a pile on my floor in the morning.

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Guy: If you look at your keyboard, you see U and I together. Girl: Look underneath. It says JK.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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