A blond, a brunette and a black haired girl are all stuck on an island....stupid women.

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You must be a parking ticket. Because you are dressed like i'd have to pay.

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Are you a parking ticket because I'm spending all my money on you and wish you were gone.

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- You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -No, your mind is so small I can't even take a step in it!

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http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

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Eat me, I'm organic!

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Are you a fart? Because you just blew me away.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put you and that other girl together.

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- you come here often? -i used to until you came here

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She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right." I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: What? Guy:When I drugged you, then dragged you all the way to my place and banged the hell out of your ass? I also managed to get my entire fist in and out of your ass several times. Moral: Wanna go out with me?

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Are you a broom? Cause you look like a rather dull, inanimate object that collects dust.

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Male: are you from Tennessee? Female: yes, why? Male: because Tennessee has great food. Do you think we could travel there together.

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Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

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-My girlfriend and I want different things out of our relationship. -She wants marriage, children and a house. -I just want out.

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M: If life had Alt + F4, I would close your clothes. F: Really? I would close YOU down!

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Male: Baby, I am God's gift to this earth! Female: Well, if I take a receipt up to Heaven, can I exchange you for someone better?

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Chick:- Don't worry, we all get nervous when we meet people. My brother: yeah, but my buttcrack gets sweaty & smelly when i get nervous!

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Guy: So how about that Tom Cruise??? Guy: ... I'm in the wrong type of bar...

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"I lost my virginity! Can I have yours?"

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Male: You are a Drugs? Female: Why? because your so addicted to me? Male: Nope, You ruined my life!

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You're like a star in the sky. Nothing but gas.

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-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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