That outfit looks great on you.. .. It would look even better crumpled up in a pile in an evidence bag

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How much does a polar bear weigh? 1000 pounds

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A man walks up to the woman, and says, "I'd like to take you on a date. How about dinner tonight?" The woman agrees, and they both have a wonderful time at a fancy Italian restaurant.

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-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

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Welcome to DIE!

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"Hi. You're looking mightily mediocre and I would like to buy you a medium priced drink."

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Are you from Austrailia? Because I'd like to put my tongue in your butthole

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Are you an angel? ... cause I have an erection!

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Male: You're so beautiful. Female: Well thank you. Male: Yeah, you look just like my Mom.

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"Hmm...you'll do."

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McDonald's isn't the only thing that is super-sized...

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Why didn't the boy make the soccer team? He missed the tryouts

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Girl: I like a romantic man. Man: oh yes? Girl: Yeah he would have to sing to me... Man: Ehem... cough... okay here goes:Madness? Madness! Madness? Madness! Girl: What? Man: THIS IS SPARTA! THIS IS SPARTA! A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A A-A-A-A-A! THIS IS SPARTA! THIS IS SPARTA! THIS IS SPARTA! THIS IS SPARTA! A-A-A.... Girl: EEEK MY EARS! *runs away* Man: Wait where are you going I am not even finished singing my youtube sparta mix!! Moral: When its hot, they pinch back, *wheeze*

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your so beautiful im blinded! aww really?! no. i was kidding. im just blind.

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Hey, you want a ride?

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He-Are you from Tennesse? Still He-Cu'z I wanna suck ur face off..

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down

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why are you you touching me ????

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Woman: Ugh I wish I could remember who you are, I mean you could even have Aids or H.I.V... Man: Hey yo don worry, Dogta tol `d I am positive so thats that Moral: The H.I.V awareness group was a message: We will go literally f/ck ourselves to death have a nice day.

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Well there's the exit, will you go out with me?

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Man: Hey sexy girl there... Whats your name? Cena: I am John Cena! I can rap because you can eat.. uh crap... wait I need some allsholes to write some rad lyrics for me here...

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-Are you the sun? -No.. Why? -Because you need to stay 93,000,000 miles away from me.

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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Sorry Nero, this is still Golgo 12, I am trying to reach you here as the other place is down, I can see why some people consider you insane, sorry to admit I left the order by the time you left as well, Eliza was the only one that could keep up with your stuff, the rest well you know... So point zero is some kind of elysum now huh? For real? And you rule there? I mean I never doubted your wisdom, but six million people living some kinda new world order at point zero? Thats hard to believe.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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