Man: Hello! Mishimush! This is a Mister Borat eh? I would like to make the sexy time with you now woman... Eh can I make the rape on you? I will not make much crushings on you if you do not bite okay? Girl: WOW! SURE! Man: Sigh... I... (takes of wig and mustachio) I am actually Sasha Baron Cohen and this is just a hidden camera scene for my movie an.. Girl: WHO THE HELL ARE YOU YOU UGLY BASTARD! GET LOST! Man: DAMN! But its me the same guy and I think I just fell in love with you an... Girl: GET OUT YOU PERVERT! 10 minutes later: Man: Hello there oh honey, this is da berlinen wassenflass Bhruno and I would like you to help me make me the hetrosexal man for das werbungen of my movie star eh? Girl: .( Sigh... I miss that Borat guy... Man: But its me! I am Both Borat and Bruno and... Girl: YOU AGAIN?! GET LOST ASSHOLE! Man: Damn... something just went very very wrong here did it not? Borat: Hello the mister Baron eh? Mishimush! I am the making movie of Crushings of America! And this is my very Manly Man Bruno! Bruno: Hello hot stuff! Cohens! Me and Borat would like to make the very manly thing with you in a threycantzen of tree peepols! Borat: EH YES! We make bang bang in the anoos together with man man and man so no gays make us they slaves! Director: Is something wrong Mr.Cohen? Man: Uh... I think I need to see a shrink for a while after this experience...

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-I like my woman like I like my coffee... without a penis

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Pick up lines from the stoneage: Man: RARGH GROG BEAT YOU WITH CLUB! AND MAKE THE LITTLE GROGS WITH YOU! Woman: But I just had one! Aww not this again whatever... Moral: And over time women adjusted to clubs and often end up knocked up when passing out in them, While men that own their own clubs usually end up knocking up a lot more of them... Some things never change...

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Hey gorgeous what are you drinking? Cyanide.

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-Do you mind if i smoke? -No. I dont even mind if you burn....

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I love you more than my jar of fingers.

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Yo imma let you finish yourself off

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"Next!"

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Female Police officer: Anything you say can and will be held against you. Me: Boobies.

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So you want tonight to be consensual or not?

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *sigh* Did what hurt? (Expecting him to say "When you fell from heaven") Boy: When you broke through the earths crust, ascending from hell.

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Man: Hello there my name is... Woman: I wish you where water... Man: So you can swallow me? Hey not so fast baby! I dont like em fast. Woman: You did not let me finish! Man: Whatever, gotta go... Moral: Girls... women... you may be mysterious, but unlocking your secrets is my favorite pastime... I CHARRENGE YOU!... Then again I never liked women throwing themselves at me without me saying a word (not that it happens very often)¨ Ps: I see some other people have started to add "morals" to their stories, without success sadly, keep going kids, and people will always of course know who the real "Moral man is" because of the cheap nature of my fantastically silly and "dragged out of the ass" nature of my morals...

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I hope you want kids, cause i've left my condoms at my girlfriends place.

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why are you you touching me ????

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I hate you already.

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Male: What's on your mind? Female: How bad you must be at sex.

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Hey do you like mansauce? Moral: MORAL KOOOOOOMBAAAAAAAAAAT!

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M:Hey baby you must be a GENERAL because your making my PRIVATES stand up F:Hmm, Your still a MAJOR disappointment See whaat i did tharrgh?

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Well there's the exit, will you go out with me?

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' together. -If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would take 'U' out entirely.

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You're like a drug to me. why because I'm so addicting?:) No, because you ruined my life.

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Do you believe in love at first hear? Because ive never dated a blind chick before.

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Is that a mirror in your pocket? because I can... Yes actually, it's my new LCD Mirror Screen Protector for my iPhone.

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hey, your cute. hey, your not.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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