Lady: Is your name REAAAAAAAAALLY Moral? Moral: Stupid big titted bimbo... seems im getting laid tonight...just like I was today, and by midday and... yeah lie.. I mean brag a lot I do not have sex THAT many times a day... okay I lied again... Anyway vote me for president at least I am honest... well actually that was a lie but...

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A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back noticeably better at the Trumpet.

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So do you want tonight to be consensual or not?

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In regard to the post below. I'm not even joking, one of my mates actually said that to a girl.

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Man: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? Woman: Did it hurt when they kicked-- *sound of gun clicking* Woman: Thanks!

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M: Hey whats up? W: My Dick!

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Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

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Woman: Ugh I wish I could remember who you are, I mean you could even have Aids or H.I.V... Man: Hey yo don worry, Dogta tol `d I am positive so thats that Moral: The H.I.V awareness group was a message: We will go literally f/ck ourselves to death have a nice day.

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Why don't you slip into something more comfortable? Like a coma?

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Guy: Have you ever been surfing? Girl: No; Yes Guy: Wanna surf in my jizz?

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- Ma'm, do you have a cigarette? - I don't really want one, I just wanted to start a conversation with you.

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Man: Do you like a sensitive guy? Women: Yeah, I used to be one.

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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Girl! you are almost as awesome as horsehead network! Moral: I got balls of steel!

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Pooh... my my... it sure its fucking cold outside, I have cooled down now, excuse me while I get back to... My well... Je ne sais quoi... Allright, foursome sex! There you got it, thumb this bitch down because I dont like bragging, but these girls dared me to do it, and we all gotta provide and share ;) Moral: I am the only man of course feck! The alternative is disguting!

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Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Are you a Geodude? Cause you're face is rockin'!

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Low confidence edition: Woman: Hi there cutie, you new here? Guy: Lady, believe me I am out of your league. Woman: You look really nice and I was wondering if... Guy: No really, believe me, I am boring and a virgin, but my mom says I am nice, but pfft no, just stop wasting your time and giving me false allusions please... Moral: Someone kill that faggot!

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man: would u please me with a blowjob girl: cant u be romantic ? man: would please me with a blowjob at the sunset

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A 85 year old man was at a bar, he goes up to the first hot thing he sees and asks do I come here often?

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-How much does a polar bear weigh? -It is impossible to know the exact weight of a polar bear where no scale or bear are present.

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*At a concert* guy- hey if you were that drum set, i'd bang you on that stage all night

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Was your dad a thief? Because he's in jail

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BOY: Are you thinking what im thinking? GIRL: I dont know, what are you thinking? BOY: both of our bum cracks smell like buttery popcorn, i like popcorn :)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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