Her: Are you from China? Because I’m China get your number Him: Tibet you are. But I'm not Russian into anything, sorry.

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Boy- is that a mirror in your pants? Girl-? Boy-because i see my self in your pants Girl-oh this, this is a picture of crap!

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Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Charmeleon is Red, Squirtle is Blue, If you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you.

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- Does this rag smell like ether? - MMMPPPHHRPHRRG!

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put "your sister" and "I" together.

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Moral man: Hey ladies... wanna read my "moral man original jokes?" then you are at the right place! Just scroll down the newest section and you will feel, insulted, charmed, happy, sad, and all that stuff you always wanted! Except beaten up... Moral man do other things to women... BTW I used to write comics (not draw them) for STUPIDO once... well I cant say more... Girl: "Reads": OMG I SO WANT YOU! Moral: If you are gonna like me less (or more) because of the "infomercial" nature of this anti-joke, then you must be the kind that yells to the TV a lot, and throw bricks at the television when it says "this show is presented by" So just do it, prove you are a nutcase, give me that luxury.

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-Hey comon baby dont be shy give me a little BlowJob -sorry im alergic to peanuts....

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Those must be space pants, because your ass is out of this world That must be a donkeys tongue, because its making an ass out of you.

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- I would go to the end of the world for you. - Yes, but would you stay there, please?

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Guy: (Walks up to girl) "I do not think it is a girls body that makes her special, it is her personality that really counts". Girl: "Well that's to bad because you can't have sex with my personality". (Then walks away)

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(boy gives flowers to a girl) Girl: Are these for me? Boy: Nope, I just want you to hold them for me for a second..

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I'm a black belt at pretty much everything, Karate, Larate, Jiu-Jitsu, Kickpunching, Beltmaking, Taekwondo.........bedroom...|:D ~Rick, the Adventure Sphere

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Hey ladies ;) I like to post lots of anti-pickuplines! ;) Girls: WOW! I WANNA JOIN YOU HOME! ME TOO ME TOO! The anti-part: This will never happen in real life.

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Hey did you fall from Heaven? Cos I think you are angel. If I'd fallen from anywhere that high I'd be in hospital with serious injuries or dead. Do the logic.

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Girl: You know I've never kissed a boy....... Boy: Me too

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Did it hurt? When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down?

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Male: Paper or plastic? Female: What? Male: Paper or plastic, you know, to put over your head.

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I'd take you to the zoo but you might be mistaken for an elephant

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I put the STD in Stud all I need is U

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Girl: If you was a rollercoaster...I'd ride you all day long.. Guy: What? Am I not big enough for you now...why can't you just be happy with me... =_= Girl: : / I was tring to be all sexy in a cute way... Guy: Pfft. FREAK... e_e

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I would be in prison.

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet... that would be nice..

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!