If I could rearrange the period table, I would put Uranium and Iodide together ;)

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He: Let me be the reason you're up all night. She: You will be. I always wake up when I have nightmares.

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Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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Pick up lines from the stone age: Fail. Man: Hello, you look beautiful, I speak very well, and if you allow me to make love with you, I promise I will protect you and raise the child with you :)! Woman: WHAT? A guy without wild chesthair that speaks instead of grunting and yelling? You to sex me and you do not even got a club? I am SOOO gonna go to Grogg instead! He has like the biggest club and knows how to really HIT a woman! Moral: I would say somethings do change, but Id rather be Grogg than the loser above, of course I prefer hitting ON women first, if that does not work I... Oh right, I am married :P

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Guy : Hey, there's a party in my pants. Wanna join? ;] Girl : Can't, I'm allergic to crabs.

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Have you heard of that new movie "Other People"? Cuz thats what i wanna see.

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Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

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Do women shake the petrol pump after filling or is that just a guy thing?

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Not as much as my dick.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Girl:Want to go out this Friday? Boy: No I like to stay inside. Girl: No I mean are you free this Friday? Boy:No Im expencive!

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How about you swing by my place so we can do some complex algebraic functions.

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B: Can I have your number ? G: Sure.. 666

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Hello my name is Horny and... oops... I got it wrong didn't I?

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Guy: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl: No, but it will hurt when I pepper spray you.

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GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

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Him: Has anyone ever told you that you are absolutely beautifull...?? Her: (smiles) and says no.. Him: there is a good reaseon for that..

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Boy: If i can rearrange the keyboard, i'll put U and I next to each other Girl: It's already together dumbass

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I lost my Nobel prize, can you help me find it?

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Sigh... No I do not have a van... Just get in the plane!

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I'm jealous of every girl that hugs you, Because for that one second she held my entire world.

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Male: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Female: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore

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Man: Wanna hear a joke about my C*ck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my P*ssy, oh wait you'll never get it

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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