- Did it hurt? - Yes.

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Man: Honestly! I am just desperate, and besides you are damn hot! Woman: Lets go to your place ;) Moral: This works, the anti-part is that no one will believe me nor try it themselves... Incredible how the easiest way is the least used...

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Boy: whats your name? Girl: i dont know, im just s fetus

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. -Nah, i already like it the way it is, with N and O beside each other

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http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

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If i don't have sex in 30 seconds i'll have to kiss you

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Man: did you just fart cuz you blew me away! Woman: actually I did, sorry if it smells I had enchiladas for lunch.

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Guy: what do this pickup line and your face have in common? Girl: what? Guy: they are both poorly constructed.

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Man and woman in bed: Man: You know I am somewhat a deviant right? Woman: Sure but I am drunk so lets just do it.. Man: I AM SO GONNA BANG YOU! (Man throws dynamite at woman) Woman: WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUU Moral: BANG INDEED... case closed.

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-Hey babe, wanna go to my place and bang all night long? -No you freak. -Well, I gave you a choice.

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-So, you wanna...? -I'm on my period.

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Her: Guess what? Him: What? Her Yo Mama! Him: Is she that slut i did last night?

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Did it hurt when you burst through the concrete emerging from hell? Yes, yes it did.

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Hey babe, how about my mom drives us to the comic book store in her Civic? I got a carseat with seat belts for two.

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Girl, I wish you were a car door, cause I'd slam you all night

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

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Hey, we have coresponding genetailia, we should converge in sexual intercourse.

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Female: Hey can i buy you a drink? Male: I have AIDS.

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Yet another one from real life: At law school: Kid to woman: Why don't I ever get any of you?! *Woman laughs* Me: You could start by not whining so much... Kid: That wont ever work! You know that is bullshit! Its not like I am whining I just whine whenever blahblahblah... Me: Sigh... Girl: He is kinda cute... Me: Wha? Moral: Not a real anti joke, since I had not heard from any of them until today, I just got invited to their wedding...

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Woman: You've got the body of a god, too bad that it's Buddha... Man: You've got the face of a Princess, too bad that it's Diana.

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Male: You're so beautiful. Female: Well thank you. Male: Yeah, you look just like my Mom.

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Me: Honestly, I just want to RAPING you. Woman: YES PLEASE! Me: Fuck off its not RAPING it its consensual... Moral: Yeah sometimes they say yes, its when they say no I become shadow made flesh... ...And wait for you... Am I here?... NOPE Ill get you rawr I will now stalk you silently for hours... days... Anyway im bored your nothing ... Moral: SAY YES YOU MUCKING MIDIOT!

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A: Wanna go get some pizza and then have sex at my place?? B: No.. B: U don't like pizza? Some chinees then?

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I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!