Guy for a girl with a dog: -Does the dog have a cell phone? -Why? is your mom in heat?

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hey bitch

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Man: Wanna see the best pick up line ever? Its an ancient secret kept for millions of years! Girl: SURE! Man: It only reveals to the fully drunk though so lets get drinking.. Girl: uh... okay... I guess.. Man: Drunk enough? Girl: Ulp... you betcha weird man! Man: Ok its hidden at my place so lets go! Girl: WOHOO!

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Tenth year anniversary female edition: Love, for each day my love grows stronger for you. Too bad honey, I married a old man and was hoping you would be dead by now. Oh! What a shock! Do you really mean that? Sigh... No, whispers: I was just hoping that would give you a stroke that's all) What was that last thing you said? Nothing "dear" Moral: Cyanide, just mash the seeds of six apples, use a syringe and presto! Dead family!

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guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

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Shorts and pants compilation: Hey you a cheap prostitute or just out of my league? Hey mom I just watched some more hentai today and wonder if you would... Why are you screaming? Its just me naked with a boner! According to hentai its completely natural! I mean I am getting to do you when I turn eighteen right? No? You are a horrible mother! I am so telling dad you wont give it up! Bitch, you like men that beat you up while fucking you? You do? Oh, my! This is like too freaky too me! *runs out girlie screaming* Dad, I watched some other hentai today and, I wonder if you... Moral: *Pants*, there you go.

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Hey baby, have you ever been to Uranus? No? Well I am about to.

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I may have never f*cked a 10 before, but I did f*ck five 2's.

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Girl: Do you know any good movies? Boy: Snakes on a plane Girl: Whats it about? Boy: It's about Horses.. on a boat.

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-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you.

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Hey, nice shoes..... Wanna F***?

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After hearing a pickup line: -I like your approach, now let's see your departure.

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"Hey baby, how do you like your eggs in the morning?" "Unfertilized."

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-I can see forever in your eyes. -But all I can see is never in yours.

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Hey baby, wanna make $50?

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Does this rag smell like chloroform?

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-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

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Can I have your number? -I don't have one.

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-I looked up beautiful in the thesaurus today and your name was included. -Thanks! Hey, I saw your name next to jerk.

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My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

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Walking to your car alone later?

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- I can tell that you want me. - Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave.

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You know how I know we're going to have sex, tonight? I'm bigger than you.

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Hey baby, you make me wanna get a job.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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