"is that a ladder in your tights? or a fire escape for the crabs?"

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How much does a polar bear weigh? 1000 pounds

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have met you before? i like eating my dogs shit.

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guy: hey do you know how to sly a dragon? girl:No. guy: well your no help.

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Hi! Do you like fat guys with no money?

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Girl- Hey ily Boy- say it it just makes it that much better ;) Girl- I'm leaving you

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TURRETES (or however you spell it) GUY ON PICKUP! Man: IM GONNA RAPE YOUUUUUUUUUUUU! Woman: EEEEEEEEEEK! (runs away) Man: I mean... I tried to say you seem nice...:( Moral: BOB SAGET!

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Would you like to come home with me you wetback spic?

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Low confidence edition: Woman: Hi there cutie, you new here? Guy: Lady, believe me I am out of your league. Woman: You look really nice and I was wondering if... Guy: No really, believe me, I am boring and a virgin, but my mom says I am nice, but pfft no, just stop wasting your time and giving me false allusions please... Moral: Someone kill that faggot!

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Man: Your body is a tempe! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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Man - "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" Woman - "Yes it does."

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Man: Well I usually do not bang women your uh... particular size, I mean you are a bit too big for me and um... I got standards... nothing personal but... I uh.. well ok lets try... I guess I stick it here and... Man2: HEY what the hell are you doing to my trailer you drunk bastard! Moral: Standards... we all have it.... just not that much of it...

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Im gonna rape you..

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Your face is like mace, every time i see if i get blinded

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Guy: Hey baby, did you come by car? Girl: No I walked. Guy: Well I can make you come in mine.

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boy: you remind me of the 20 letters of the alphabet girl: there's 26 boy: how could I forget U R A Q T girl: that's 5 boy: you can get the D later girl: you mean the V?

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http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

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By reason or by Strength, moral man has a serious side too, and I prevail. Moral: Threats... anyone in my unit threatening another would simply be thrown in jail for a couple of weeks, then kicked out, and using military equipment to threaten, trace and murder people is highly illegal. Asshole, troll or not, I will use my right and reason to have you removed permanently from the horsehead network if you persist.

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Guy: I got you a gift! Girl: Thanks.. make sure it's not you....

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Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

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Man enters bar: Man: is there any... I mean ANY woman that would not instantly reject me here? If there is, I would like her... or in worst case scenario, HIM that she/he is very special to me and has the most beautiful eyes ever... THANK YOU

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Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to beat you again?

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there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

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Superman: I bet I can bang you faster than the speed of light! Woman: OOOOH! OK DO IT! Superman... uh... I already did it 30 times already... "pant" "pant" Woman: uh... really? Uh... was I suppose to feel anythi... Moral: Since when has fast sex been good sex?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!