"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

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Do you work at Subway? Cuz you just gave me a footlong

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Yo imma let you finish yourself off

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If your right leg was Thanksgiving and your left leg was Christmas, could i come between the holidays?

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Lol, lucky you that this piece of shit site worked so fast for you huh DAD? Fine, I need no essay on her ass, my firm (well where I work at the top of the foodchain lets be modest here) sponsors all Samsung phones, so seriously ill get you the most expensive one I can find (its free, ill just tell them I need an extra one for, calling, but just for you, if you tell anybody else, ill just slash your tires. Man, I hate HATE sounding nice because I am not, but you can have that damn Fiat something (black car) that I bought from my ex, you take that instead? You still owe me the cash, but the car is yours (I never use it, and its you know... Bad, but still ten thousand times better than your car. Moral: Me? I just cant bother using my wives phone in order to call myself and find my own damn phone, so if you read this, you are golden. Oh, and if you want that piece of shit car of yours (cant even tell the brand can you? Seriously tell me) then you can have the damn money, but no paintjob, that car is, and must look like the trash it is. AMEN? Jk, Fuck Amen. Finally, so you want one with Keyboard attachment or one with keyboard embedded into the screen? The ones with the keyboards are usually a bit more pricey, but man, some of them suck ass, still I can get you like the one I got for business (yeah we gotta use fucking Samsung phones it pays well though) And forget your damn car tires, XD Im laughing here, some could steal those dirty flat pieces of shit, and you would be driving without noticing shit my whigga XD.

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Hey I used to be a man, but I'm pretty horny.

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Man: Desperate for sex? Woman: Actually, kinda... Man: Great! Woman: :D Man: Because you see, my grandpa is dying of aids and wants to spread his disease so part of him can live in... Where you going? Moral: Desperate for sex? Too bad I have a pulmonary infection rite nao.

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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Guy: what do this pickup line and your face have in common? Girl: what? Guy: they are both poorly constructed.

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You must be a parking ticket. Because you are dressed like i'd have to pay.

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*When you get her to your place* I'm just going to be honest. I've been on the FBI's most wanted list for quite some time now.

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Girl- Hey ily Boy- say it it just makes it that much better ;) Girl- I'm leaving you

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Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

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HELLO I AM BORAT! MISHIMUSH! I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE THE MOVIE OF MAKING THE RAPE OF THE AMERICAN WOMAN! WILL YOU HELP US? Woman: NO!!!!!! Oh... ok Mishimush! We make the other Movie then, BORAT THE CRUSHINGS OF AMERICA.

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Roses are red violets are blue i got a gun get in the van!

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Yet another one from real life: At law school: Kid to woman: Why don't I ever get any of you?! *Woman laughs* Me: You could start by not whining so much... Kid: That wont ever work! You know that is bullshit! Its not like I am whining I just whine whenever blahblahblah... Me: Sigh... Girl: He is kinda cute... Me: Wha? Moral: Not a real anti joke, since I had not heard from any of them until today, I just got invited to their wedding...

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Man: Hey you are so pretty I bet you are a hooker! Woman: Uh.. thanks but no.. Man: Damn... I was hoping to get laid tonight...

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Hi I'm Shaniqua.

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can i take a dump in your mouth?

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Boy : Gurle: hi

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girl, are you a christian? Sure... Do you believe in me? I dont even know you! Well, met God? No? You love him!

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"Have you ever seen a 2-incher?"

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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