Hey, we have coresponding genetailia, we should converge in sexual intercourse.

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-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

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Male: I have a large penis female: so do i.

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Babe your dad is an terorist because your a real bomb !!!

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Male: Hey baby you wanna play telephone, i got the string and you got the cans! Female: ...

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M: Wanna play dynamite? W: what's that? M: I lie on my back and you blow the sh** out of me.

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What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

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BOY-i love you GIRL-(sneezes) sorry im allergic to bullshit

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Are you an erection? 'Cause you're growing on me.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

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I put the STD in Stud all I need is U

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you work at subway? cuz you givin me a footlong;)

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-Excuse me do you know how much a polar bear weighs? -Enough to break the ice? -Ummm... yea... *silence*

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Your clothes are making me uncomfortable, take them off.

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Girl, I wish you were a car door, cause I'd slam you all night

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I am terribly sorry for talking to you, but I was wondering if...

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Losers pick-up sex guide. 1. Create a beautiful environment at home, with candles, romantic music, etc. 2. Buy lube, some sexy female underwear, a couple of sex toys, some erotic magazines to excite you`re partner. 3. Pick-up you`re stuff and masturbate.

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-I looked up beautiful in the thesaurus today and your name was included. -Thanks! Hey, I saw your name next to jerk.

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-Eeeeeeeey girl how much does a polar bear weigh? -An adult male weighs around 350–680 kg (770–1,500 lb),[4] while an adult female is about half that.

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Miss excuse me but... Moral: Admitt it fucker, you cant pick up a girl by apolgizing for whatever you are gonna do beforehand. GIMME FIVE! (red thumbs, red is the color of love or something)

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Man- According to my magic watch you're not wearing any underwear. Woman- Yes, I am! Man- Damn! I guess my watch is 15 minutes fast.

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HELLO I AM BORAT! MISHIMUSH! I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE THE MOVIE OF MAKING THE RAPE OF THE AMERICAN WOMAN! WILL YOU HELP US? Woman: NO!!!!!! Oh... ok Mishimush! We make the other Movie then, BORAT THE CRUSHINGS OF AMERICA.

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Are you a speeding, aggressive driver? Because your running straight up my ass

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You like peanuts? Cause I like penis.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!