- Anti-Pickup Line

I love every bone in your body, especially mine.

-I lost my phone number. Can I have yours? -No.

Holla holla holla, ill be there like right now, its a bit far. But dawg, did you say you are both at work and banging a chick? Someone is bragging here yo son! Anyways, phone is dead, gotten towed like 50-60 times in total (not only the freeway), and... Nah man, its cool, you know I dont really ask for much, I mean I can still pay you something. Yeah your skinny bitch hands, you can slap me 50 times son.

I asked my friend who the prettiest girl in here is, and he told me to ask you because you seemed more familiar with everyone here.

A modified classic, props to the original poster: Man: Ask me out! Woman: Ok, get out! Man: No no, I said ASK me out. Woman: Okay... will you please get out? Man: No but thanks for asking me out, I am so gonna tell your friends how I rejected you asking me out. Moral: When beaten... THERE IS NO BEATING! If negative people can turn everything into a loss, thinking positive call help you turn anything into victory. I mean Hitler murdered millions right? Arent you happy (Jew or not), that it was not you? VICTORY! (if somehow Pyrrhic depending on how you turn on it... But if you wanna turn a gain to a pain, go ahead...)

Do you come here often? Because you're usually working the streets whenever I see you.

Shorts and pants compilation: Hey you a cheap prostitute or just out of my league? Hey mom I just watched some more hentai today and wonder if you would... Why are you screaming? Its just me naked with a boner! According to hentai its completely natural! I mean I am getting to do you when I turn eighteen right? No? You are a horrible mother! I am so telling dad you wont give it up! Bitch, you like men that beat you up while fucking you? You do? Oh, my! This is like too freaky too me! runs out girlie screaming Dad, I watched some other hentai today and, I wonder if you... Moral: Pants, there you go.

Me: You know what bitch... You are burp such a bitch... That I am just gonna smear peanut butter on my crotch and... Lady: Dude, I am a man but okay! Me: You are a guy? Did you have to tell me that? I mean I got beer googles but I hear perfectly well! Then his girlfriend which happened to be my cousin showed up and... facepalm

Are you from Tennessee? Because we are both in Tennessee and I thought asking where you grew up would be a good way to get to know you better.

Male: Man, if we were married... Female: What? We'd make beautiful children? Male: No, I'd leave your sorry, and ungrateful ass and make you stay with the kid.

Every girl wants to be swept off her feet... It's when you put her in the trunk of your car that she starts to freak out.

What do you do for a living?" "I'm a professional athlete." "Oh really? What sport do you play?" "Golf.

Are you an angel? ... cause I have an erection!

Man: Dayuuuum slaps ass Woman: I just took a shit in my pants and you smacked it.

Hey, nice shoes..... Wanna F***?

Five dollar women... WOO!

-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you ascended from the depths of hell and broke through the earth's crust?

Dating tips 101: First you find a girl that likes you. Then you realize no girl likes you. Moral: Lesson done.

Man: Hello there young lady, I am Elton John and I would very much like to have sex with you! Girl: OMG ITS... Wait! Wow you look a lot like him! But you cannot be real lol leaves Man: Man... I look and dress just like him! What could have gone wrong? Man getting the operation cost me a fortune too! Next time I am gonna try Freddie Mercury! Moral: "Dats gay Fifthy cen... I mean Gangstalicious!"

Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa what I don't want for Christmas?

Me 17 years old: Hey, girl, you are hot how old are you? Girl: 14. Me: What but you have enormous... Never mind, uh nice evening huh?... My friend: Big boobs on er huh? I would have hit on her too had it not been for... Me: Shut up... Crap! Moral: That was a crappy day!

Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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