What happens when a drunk swedish man prank calls 911 from a local bar? The ambulance comes

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Male-where have you been all my life ? Female-not in it thats for sure Male-i was singing a song i wouldn't want YOU in my life Female-i was singing a song 2 *lies*

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Guy: You look two times as beautiful with makup on. Girl: Really? I think you would too.

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Monday went by and he didn't see her Tuesday was the same Wednesday came and the swelling had finally gone down for him to make his wife out

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Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

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Man - I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away. Woman - Good cus' your breath stinks!

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have met you before? i like eating my dogs shit.

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Is that a banana in your pants? Can I have yours?

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- Hey do you wanna hang out? - I'm 17.

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-As I slipped my finger in her hole I could feel her getting wetter and wetter, When I pulled it out she was going down on me. I should probably start looking for a new boat...

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Nice hair, can I pull it?

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-Do you come here often? -Yeah, but now that you're here, I think I'll find another bar.

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Hey, you look like a hooker I fondled in Las Vegas

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- you're so fat! - I know you are, but what am I? -awwww, thanks man!!! -I didn't mean it like that!

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Did you just fart? 'cos you blew me away

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*Boy looks at cloth* -Does this smell like chlorophorm?

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your boobs are bigger than my nose

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Holla holla holla, ill be there like right now, its a bit far. But dawg, did you say you are both at work and banging a chick? Someone is bragging here yo son! Anyways, phone is dead, gotten towed like 50-60 times in total (not only the freeway), and... Nah man, its cool, you know I dont really ask for much, I mean I can still pay you something. Yeah your skinny bitch hands, you can slap me 50 times son.

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Yeah... you'll have to do.

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How much does a whales weigh? How much? Just enough to make you look skinny.

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Female=You Son of a B*tch! Male=Hi Mum!

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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"You look like Carmen Electra's deformed, burned, dismembered sister..."

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Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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