Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

He: Let me be the reason you're up all night. She: You will be. I always wake up when I have nightmares.

Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

your boobs are bigger than my nose

Why are you crying? I have to walk out these woods alone!

Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

Man seriously? Free Samsung? And that Fiat, I been wondering how much you want for it, not that i got it but I was considering buying it sometime. Son, I got no idea what brand this piece of shit car is, but the wheels are cool. No really, if you mean it, ill take that Fiat man, man, ill kiss your feet, ill do it, no really I mean Really? I mean really really? Man If you mean it, ill get over there right away, and man, you can have dunno, bad times, hell ANYTHING Okay? But if you are just messing with me, you can go fuck yourself and your phone man!

It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

all in all it was a good orgy

I'm an Ice Bear, I guess i just broke the "ICE" between us ....

Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

A modified classic, props to the original poster: Man: Ask me out! Woman: Ok, get out! Man: No no, I said ASK me out. Woman: Okay... will you please get out? Man: No but thanks for asking me out, I am so gonna tell your friends how I rejected you asking me out. Moral: When beaten... THERE IS NO BEATING! If negative people can turn everything into a loss, thinking positive call help you turn anything into victory. I mean Hitler murdered millions right? Arent you happy (Jew or not), that it was not you? VICTORY! (if somehow Pyrrhic depending on how you turn on it... But if you wanna turn a gain to a pain, go ahead...)

Guy- Hey girl do u like math Girl-um, sure Guy- ok I got a problem... Add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply the bodies.... What does that equal.... Girl- u and ur homo friends

"Hey, I have the feeling i've seen you before somewhere..." "Well, could be, I used to be a porn actress.

Whatever I'll just date myself.

You know how I know we're going to have sex, tonight? I'm bigger than you.

You dont need makeup, plastic surgery is really cheap nowadays!

Man: Put your face over my fist as I say shinku Woman: Huh? Ok whatever.... SHOOOOOOOOOORYUKEEEEEEN!

-Hey, do you have a cat? -Why do you ask? -Because I'd love to pet your pussy. -Well, that makes two of us.

hey did you fall from heaven? because my car is all smashed up.

Roses are red violets are blue i got a gun get in the van!

Chick:- Don't worry, we all get nervous when we meet people. My brother: yeah, but my buttcrack gets sweaty & smelly when i get nervous!

the word of the day is legs lets go to your house and spread the word

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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