Guy: Hi, I am sexually attracted to you. May I walk over to the bar and purchase you a drink and then another and then another untill you become intoxicated and more likely to allow me to have sexual intercourse with you? Girl: You speak funny. Get lost.

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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Boy- Didi it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until i saw you.

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Man: Hey lady... you new here? I havent seen you around here before ;) Woman: Im your wife! >:/ Man: Which one of them? I have married so many sluts just to get sex with them... that I forget about...

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Dating post: "Nice male looking for female company, I have a steady job and would prefer if you too had a job, you will be particularity happy if you have a small penis fetish. Signed BIGPENIS19INCHESJIMlight sleeper

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EVERYONE ELSE

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Guy- Hey, wanna come back to my place? Girl- Umm... I don't think 2 people can fit in that box...

thumb_up thumb_down -94

Man: Wanna go to my home and have sex? Woman: Well... OK! Man: Wow you are easy!... wait! Where are you going? COME BACK! Moral: They are not easy, they just like a man with balls... and you where obviously not one of them... LAME OVER.

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-How much does a polar bear weigh? -It is impossible to know the exact weight of a polar bear where no scale or bear are present.

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Women love it when you kiss their neck. Just not while they are driving and while you're in the back seat and when they don't know you...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Guy: Theres this girl and Ive been meaning to ask her something... Girl: I bet I know who it is ;D Guy: Oh good. So is your mom available on Friday?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I thought I was ugly, but then I met you

thumb_up thumb_down -31

You wanna go somewhere? Yeah, where? The Swingers Association.

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Guy: I lost my phone number, Can I have yours? Girl: Your phone service would help you get a new one.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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A couple wanted to try something different in the bedroom, The wife suggests they do it in a 69 position so they get into position but the wife lets one off in the husbands face she apologises and they try again when the wife farts again the husband gets up to leave and says no I don't think I can do this another 67 times!

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The anti part of below comment, may be the fact that its going to get thumbed down to Hades. Moral: They see me rollin, they envious... women that look like supermodels that work as jurists dont come easy... unless you are Moral Man. *Plays moral man theme* (Character inspired by Salvador Dali, I mean what greater inspiration than the man that celebrated each day as he woke up in the body and mind of the greatest man ever? Me? Same, but I also wake up next to the greatest woman ever.)

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guy: r u from mcdonalds, coz im luvin it :D Girl: r u from burger king coz ur fat :L

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Hello im a thief and I'm here to steal your purse

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Hey, you want a ride?

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- Did it hurt? - What? - When you were catapaulted from the firey bowels of Hell?

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Girl: Hey, why don't you and I go out to dinner? Guy: Thanks, but if I wanted to watch a whore stuff her face full of meat, I'd just load up Redtube.

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Boy: whats your name? Girl: i dont know, im just s fetus

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Boy- Did it hurt when you fell- Girl- From heaven?!? AWWW <3 Boy- No the whore tree when you banged every guy on the way down.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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