Stable relationships are for horses.

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Man: I am willing to give my life for you. Woman: How about you fucking get one instead and rather seek me out then? Moral: M-M-M-Morale breaker!

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Lesbihonest

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I have a lot of family that lives there, maybe we're related.

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You look like a dog... Wana bone?

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As long as I have a face, you will always have a place to sit.

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If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

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I have a .357 magnum pointed at your kidney. Wanna go get some coffee?

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I have a knife and a penis. Choose which one goes in you.

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He: I know all 21 letters of the Alphabet She: Isn't there 26?? He: Oh yeah...i keep forgetting URAQT

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Will you marry me? WHO ARE YOU?

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So I saw you walk into the bar from the scope of my rifle and I was wondering if you'd enjoy some unconsentual sex in the back of my van?

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I'd take you to the zoo but you might be mistaken for an elephant

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Husband: I will always get breakfast and newspapers in bed AT 5:30 baby, but not wake me when you wake up at 4:30

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I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

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Mirrors can't talk, luckily for you they can't laugh either

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Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

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Hey baby, can I cream in your chocolate?

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your boobs are bigger than my nose

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I am terribly sorry for talking to you, but I was wondering if...

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Are your parents retarded? Because you sure are special.

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Get in the van.

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Would you like to come home with me you wetback spic?

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-Are you the sun? -No.. Why? -Because you need to stay 93,000,000 miles away from me.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!