Did it hurt? When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down?

The Non Moral method: "Hi I am the jack off all trades and master of none!" Moral: "Yo, I am the jack of no trades, and master of all!" So uh, Anti Pickuplines are pickup lines that do not work... Hmm, I think I get it... Hmm, no I don't...

A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

Did you just fart? 'cos you blew me away

*Boy looks at cloth* -Does this smell like chlorophorm?

You're so hot that if someone threw a grenade at you, I'd probably throw it back because falling on it sounds like a really dumb idea.

I hope you want kids, cause i've left my condoms at my girlfriends place.

Man: Do you work at Subway? Girl: Why? Did I just give u a 6 inch?

M:Hey baby you must be a GENERAL because your making my PRIVATES stand up F:Hmm, Your still a MAJOR disappointment See whaat i did tharrgh?

Are you an angel? ... cause I have an erection!

Do you wanna go halves in a bastard?

I have a really big..... Bank Account

girl, are you a christian? Sure... Do you believe in me? I dont even know you! Well, met God? No? You love him!

- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

I am Lucifer, my color is blue I already got my queen TO HELL WITH YOU! Moral: Know my name and fear it, I am now and forever.

Wanna go back to my place and watch some CarVideos?

Are you from tennessee? Cause you've got fine written all over you.

Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! *walks away disgusted* Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven... Because it looks like you landed on your face!

you look fap-fap-fap-fabulous

HONEY! I SEE MEDUSA!!!!!!!!!!! oh wait, it was just you

-Your eyes are as blue as toilet water

Hey, can I have your number? No, I'm not a Jew.

Man: *Pokes Woman* Ouch! You burned me! Woman: How did I burn you? Man: Because you're just THAT hot. ;) Woman: *Pokes Man* Well it's too bad you're not.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!