- Does this napkin smell like chloroform to you? There is no response because she passed out from it and he leaves in order to void suspicion.

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2 fake blondes hitting on me. blondes: we're twins! me: so where are you from? blonde1: canada! blonde2 (at the same time): finland!

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Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I would be in prison.

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Boy: Wanna go see a movie. Girl: Which movie. Boy: Texas Chainsaw Massicure. Girl: What is it about. Boy: Unicorns and Rainbows. Girl: Let's go!

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He: Let me be the reason you're up all night. She: You will be. I always wake up when I have nightmares.

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Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

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Your skin would make a nice coat.

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I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

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Hello little girl would you like some candy, yes? ;-)

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Hey Clarkson, you know about this pointless invention Named Nero The Moral man? Clarkson: No. Nero: No. Is this because horsehead network sucks? Clarkson: Yes. Nero: WTF AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE! Oh yeah I am fucking it away... Fuck me, every girl around me just ends up completely fucked.... ;)

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Man: DAMN BABE YOUR SO DAMN HOT I... Woman: You know what? Im so sick of you guys hitt... Man: OOOOOOOOOOOOH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! YEEEEEEEEEES THIS IS DELISHUSH! Woman: WHAT HAPPENED? :O Man: Huh? Never mind, ZZZZZZZZZZZZ

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Man; Wanna play the rape game? Girl; No Man; That's the spirit

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Are you a computer technician? Because you turn my hardware into software.

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Do you why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

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-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

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Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

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Are you an electrician? Cuz' you turn me on.

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-Your father must be an alien because your out of this world -More like out of your league

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One hot summer night in 1960, Steve had his first date with Susie. He went to pick her up and her mom answered the door. She invited him in, and asked him what they planned to do on their date. Steve replied that they’d probably see a movie then get a burger. Susie’s mom said, “Well, Susie really likes to screw.” Steve said, “Huh?” Her mom said, “Yes, she loves it. She could probably screw all night.” “Okay, thanks!” replied Steve, mentally rearranging his plans for the night. A few minutes later Susie came downstairs and they left on their date. About a half hour later Susie came running back in the house, her clothes disheveled, and yelled: “Mom, it’s called the TWIST! The name of the goddamn dance is the TWIST!”

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boyscout? The boyscout returned from camp.

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Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

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I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

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Hey baby me you CHOIN CHOIN under the moonlight..

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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