I love every bone in your body, especially mine.

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GET IN THE VAN!!!

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I'm craving some bacon, wanna strip?

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- Can I have your number? - Sure. Twelve.

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: Ascending from hell and breaking through the earth's crust.

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Drink this!

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Does the carpet match the drapes? -Do I look bald?

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"Don't scream"

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whats your name beautiful? ;) Tony... (silence)

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So which of you ladies wants to recieve child support payments from me next year?

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I take the the out of psychotherapist

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"Hey baby, how do you like your eggs in the morning?" "Unfertilized."

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nice kid... want another?

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You look exactly like my sister.

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i would traval the earth for you. well then im going to the moon.

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You have the nicest smile I could ever hope to come across.

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-I better drive you home, miss. Because you're a woman and you can't drive. Get it?

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-If I take you home, will you iron my clothes and make me a sandwich?

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(Guy mumbles a bit, then says): You don't know me, but can I get you a drink? Yeah, sure... OK. HAHAHAA!!! Before I asked if you wanted a drink I mumbled "Do you want to have sex"? And you said yes! HAHAHAA!!!

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http://pirater-gratuit.fr hacker un compte fb

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Are you a unicorn cause u sure look horny girl:are u a turtle cause ur really slow ur the 10th guy to hit on me.....in 5 minutes

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Guy:I invented troll face oh yea! Girl:you gave my daughter nightmares for weeks you b****!(throws drink in face)

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Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

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Boy: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Girl: Did it hurt when you were thrust through the ash-filled layers of Hell?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!