- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

-Can I have your number? -Can my boyfriend punch you in the face?

Heard at a bra: Hi I am Moral man, the third most infamous guy at a list where Beiber is first. Girl: OMG I MUST HAVE YOU! Moral: ooooh... ANTI Joke duh... I thought this was great pickup lines!

Would you like to come home with me you wetback spic?

Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

You are almost as beautiful as my mother.

sex me.

Girl: You know I've never kissed a boy....... Boy: Me too

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a mac10. GET IN THE VAN.

Hey baby, do you play soccer? Because I think I'm gonna score tonight. ... Well, you can't score if the player ain't no good.

Ugly begins with U. But awesome ends with ME.

So I saw you walk into the bar from the scope of my rifle and I was wondering if you'd enjoy some unconsentual sex in the back of my van?

Talk to me or I'll burn your face with this acid.

-Hey baby,what's your sign? (; -Do not enter. >_>

Are you a parking ticket because I'm spending all my money on you and wish you were gone.

Whats best about having sex with twenty six year olds?..... Theres twenty of them!

Guy: Do you wanna be the sun of my life? Girl: Ok sure Guy: Then go stand 13. billion miles away from me

-don't sit on the table, people eat there! -don't sit on that chair, people sit there!

Hi there, the voices in my head are telling me to talk to you.

What did you do to Kelly? Why? Because she said you did her good(; What? Cuz' I heard you did that goood thing(; When? Last night on the bed, 3am(;

I am sick of pretty girls, I want something sick smelly disgusting, fat or anorexic, with a personality that kills flowers and that makes me vomit... I guess you will have to do for now. :( Moral: At least she was not the perfect match huh? Always look at the bright side of eternal darkness.

"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

SEE WHAT’S UP, DOWN UNDER.

How'd you like to earn 14 dollars, the HARD way?

In a loud bar: Man: Do you enjoy gRape? Woman: HOW DARE YOU YOU PERVERT! Man: Uh... how about raisins then... Woman: Err... can you repeat that first question again... Moral: I would but I would have to bypass the censorship somehow...

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book