Sugar-free sugar cookies

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car I want to rape you

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He: Did you fall from Heaven? She: Well... He: 'Cos I got an erection. She: -__-

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(boy gives flowers to a girl) Girl: Are these for me? Boy: Nope, I just want you to hold them for me for a second..

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Boy: Hey girl, do you wanna play hard to get? Girl: No. Boy: That's the spirit!

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"Are you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out." "I charge $80 with anesthesia, $40 without."

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-Do you like me? -No

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male:hey what that between your leggs female: my sisters penis

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man: may I impale you on my stake? woman: O.o (for goth girls)

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Guy: What does a girl like you doing to a place like this? Girl: Trying to get away from you

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Im tired of fapping... wanna help me get some variation?

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Do you like a trimmed bush? Because I'm a gardener. Here's my business card, call me, seriously I need the work.

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-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

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Do Your feet hurt? Cause youve been stomping on my dreams for 3 years now

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Shaved your beard, so I can see you're a woman.

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TURRETES (or however you spell it) GUY ON PICKUP! Man: IM GONNA RAPE YOUUUUUUUUUUUU! Woman: EEEEEEEEEEK! (runs away) Man: I mean... I tried to say you seem nice...:( Moral: BOB SAGET!

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Sexual harassment, it can be a touchy subject.

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Have you ever heard of World of Warcraft?

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I stole this pickup line from Antipickupline.com.

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Woman enters gynecologist office: Man: YO I am the vaginator! Woman: Vaginator? Man: You know, the guy that is gonna fu.. I mean study your pussy with the long hard spear and see if your juices are okay and stuff... Woman: HuuuuuuuH? Moral: Writing this makes me understand why some women dont exactly enjoy a trip to the "Vaginator" so I forgot the moral and the point... my sympaties though...

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Hey ladies ;) I like to post lots of anti-pickuplines! ;) Girls: WOW! I WANNA JOIN YOU HOME! ME TOO ME TOO! The anti-part: This will never happen in real life.

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You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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Guy: You look like a suitable mate and I'd thoroughly enjoy engaging in rough, sweaty sex with you and your lady parts.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!