-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

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hey, your cute. hey, your not.

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Is your father a gardener? -No, why? ..Because I was wondering what a cactus like you doing in a place like this.

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Im the demanding customer, your Dominos Pizza, I will make you Cum in 30 minutes or less.

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Guy: What does a girl like you doing to a place like this? Girl: Trying to get away from you

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One hot summer night in 1960, Steve had his first date with Susie. He went to pick her up and her mom answered the door. She invited him in, and asked him what they planned to do on their date. Steve replied that they’d probably see a movie then get a burger. Susie’s mom said, “Well, Susie really likes to screw.” Steve said, “Huh?” Her mom said, “Yes, she loves it. She could probably screw all night.” “Okay, thanks!” replied Steve, mentally rearranging his plans for the night. A few minutes later Susie came downstairs and they left on their date. About a half hour later Susie came running back in the house, her clothes disheveled, and yelled: “Mom, it’s called the TWIST! The name of the goddamn dance is the TWIST!”

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Ay girl, those jeans make your ass look fat. Now I'ma get you pregnant while you make breakfast.

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"Are you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out." "I charge $80 with anesthesia, $40 without."

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Your clothes are making me uncomfortable, take them off.

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Man: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? Woman: Did it hurt when they kicked-- *sound of gun clicking* Woman: Thanks!

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Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

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Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got fine written all over you.

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-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

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-What's your favorite color? -bl... -mine too! Let's f***

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Boy-That's a nice outfit. Girl-Thanks!!! Boy- It would look even better scrunched up at the end of my bed.

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Does the carpet match the drapes? -Do I look bald?

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—do you believe in love at first sight or shall I come back again? —no, and I think you shall not come back ever.

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I have a gun.

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He: Did it hurt? She: When I fell from heaven? heard it before... He: No, when you fell from the ugly tree!

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Man at bar: Hey girls... want my banana in your pajamas? ;) ;) ;) Girls: YEAH! Man: "thinks for himself..."... man I never get this reaction from girls.. you are a bunch of skanks and sluts... (leaves the bar) In the end, we are never happy with what we get are we? yeah... this is kinda the moral of this story... (Ps: My banana in your pajamas... I got a girlfriend, but someday Im gonna try that pick up line... hahahaha

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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You wanna have sex and get married?? Ok... Sorry.

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-Is there anything I can do for you? -Fill my care cup. Oh, actually, I don't think you can manage to do that.

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I was a little bit nervous to talk to you at first, but thankfully my Aides encouraged me to do it.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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