- Anti-Pickup Line

-I can see forever in your eyes. -But all I can see is never in yours.

Man: HELP! I am dying of disease and have only one day left to live! My only wish... "sob" is to procreate... to have a son or a daughter... Woman: Aww... well maybe I can help you... Man: :D I cant believe it (tears in eyes) Woman: What are you dying of? Man: Aids... Woman proceeds to disappear in a ball of smoke. Moral of the story: Dunno find it yourself ffs I dont even know why people read this crap... funny typing it though.. thumbs ups for that :D

Didnt I just meet you at world of warcraft? My nickname is desperaterapist838493

girl: i like you boy with downs: i liek trains

Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got fine written all over you.

-When you see the most beautiful girl ever, you take her next to a cliff, a manhole or whatever and you kick her off the cliff. Man: THIS IS SPARTA! Girl: Wow what a manly man! dies Moral: What? This is anti-pickup lines! And its not like you are gonna get the most beautiful girl ever anyways... Madness? THIS IS SPARTA!

Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

ANYWAY... I have been married for around X years right? (My wife is anon because reasons valid reasons!) And I told my wife "Babe, you know what you got married into baby, how about you and I consider having a third one in the bed... No not a guy, thats disgusting, you agree? Awwride! So anyways, she was like "Uh... Ask me again in a year I need to think things trough, and I want you for myself..." Next week we was fucking my new (back then neighbor) which is 28 or whatever (I dont remember my neighbors name BAHAHA (actual laugher)... Peeps, say what you want about me, ill be the one fucking the prom queen tomorrow... And you know, maybe someone else, sex with more than my waifu the prom queen is addictive, I mean sharing (salive, cum juices) is caring right? Okay, I better stop here, Rebecca (SHADDAP AUTOCORRECT ITS HOW HER NAME IS SPELLED... I guess) is upset... No not because I am typing this, but because I am out here freezing my ballz off smoking her ciggs... Man The great stuff about "decent equipment" is that I dont need all that much energy, just the speed to keep the girls screaming!

Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

-Do you mind if i smoke? -No. I dont even mind if you burn....

Guy: I got you a gift! Girl: Thanks.. make sure it's not you....

-can i buy you a drink? i buy you a taxi?

- How 'bout we go to your place and take a shower together? - I think my husband and little baby would get a kick out of that!

Famous male actors guide on pick-up. 1. Enter Disco. 2. Say hello out loud. 3. By this point you`re screwed... literally.

Man: Hello there my name is... Woman: I wish you where water... Man: So you can swallow me? Hey not so fast baby! I dont like em fast. Woman: You did not let me finish! Man: Whatever, gotta go... Moral: Girls... women... you may be mysterious, but unlocking your secrets is my favorite pastime... I CHARRENGE YOU!... Then again I never liked women throwing themselves at me without me saying a word (not that it happens very often)¨ Ps: I see some other people have started to add "morals" to their stories, without success sadly, keep going kids, and people will always of course know who the real "Moral man is" because of the cheap nature of my fantastically silly and "dragged out of the ass" nature of my morals...

You know, you can't spell "stud" without STD and U

Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to beat you again?

hey bitch

Roses are red, violets are blue. When I take a shit I think about you bitch flushes the toilet

-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

Does this rag smell like chloroform?

I lost my Nobel prize, can you help me find it?

Man: I would kill anyone at anytime for a kiss from you. Woman: Kill yourself now.

I would take a bullet for you. In COD. JK THAT WOULD RUIN MY KILLSTREAKS

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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