- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

He says: Are you're from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. She says: Well, if we're making bad jokes: Are you from Illinois? Because you make me ill, and when I throw up from your face I'll make a lot of nois.

Man: Wanna come see my collection of stamps? ;) Woman: Actually id prefer we go to your place have sex ;) Man: GEEEEEEEZ! What does a man have to do to show off his stamp collection here?

Are you a dinosaur? Because you look like you got hit by an asteroid.

Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

Man: Hey, you dont look that fucking ugly, wanna go home with me? mirror: shatters Moral: If your ugliness ever shatters your mirror let me know, ill look at it and it will assemble itself back on its own.

He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

Wow...you don't sweat much for a fat girl.

Hey girl... U remind me of my pinkie toe.. Ur small cite and I'll probably bang u on the coffee table later

male-"Do you have a rape fetish?" fenale-"No, i don't" male-"Ohh... Well you're not going enjoy this."

While I am certain that the police consider you a person of interest, I assure you I do not.

man: wanna know how i know we're going to f**k tonight? woman: how? man: cuz im stronger than you!

Is there a mirror in your pocket?... Because if so, you should probably take it out and, uh, fix what you have going on there.

HE ; " MY NAME'S BOND, JAMES BOND" SHE;" MY NAME'S , OFF!"

Did it hurt? Did what hurt? When you fell from heaven.. and crushed all the people below (for a fat girl)

Oh hotness I wanna bang you!

-Hey baby, are you from Tennessee? Because you're like a solid 7.

do you work at subway? 'cause you give me foot long. i'll do you a favour and cut it up

Girl, did it hurt when you got dragged up all the way from hell? Moral: The hell with morals!

She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right." I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."

Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book