If I asked you out on a date, would your answer to that question be the same as your answer to this question?

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Do you work at Subway? Cuz you just gave me a footlong

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Man with huge arms and HUGE muscles enters a... pub! (for variety`s sake) "Hey you like fisting!" Woman: Yeah kinda.. I mean HOLY SHIT NO! I DONT PLEASE STOP NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH! Moral: Get a room you two! (a moral man original)

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Come lay your head upon my chest. (After a moment) Perhaps you'd be more comfortable onmy stomache (pushes head down)

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A long time ago I had a vision of someone like you. I was in a psych ward, wearing a straight jacket. Would you like some blended cheese?

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Boy- Did it hurt when you fell- Girl- From heaven?!? AWWW <3 Boy- No the whore tree when you banged every guy on the way down.

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Girl - You smell nice, what have you got on? Boy - I have a hardon but i didn't think you could smell it.

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Hey, we have coresponding genetailia, we should converge in sexual intercourse.

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I put the STD in STUD, now all I need is U.

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on a scale from 1 to 10, when did you lose your virginity?

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Hey girl! Faggot.

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Man: Hi ladies I am back for more if you know what I mean ;) Ladies: Get lost you damn hippie! The seventies are over! Man: Whaaat? I died for your sins you know! Moral: Ever heard of Jesus`s ladyfriends? There, now you see what I mean.

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Do you have a mirror in your pants, because it looks like you have a dick.

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-ILY -Aw. Spell it out it will make it more special. -I'm Leaving You

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BOY-i love you GIRL-(sneezes) sorry im allergic to bullshit

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I love you more than my jar of fingers.

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Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

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whats it like being the only beautiful girl in the world? Whats it like having the smallest dick in the world?

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Every kiss begins with K ;) Yeah to bad ugly begins with U

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Are you an erection? 'Cause you're growing on me.

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-Can I get your Number? -29435566 (see if you can get it.)

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I AM FAGNETO! WELCOME TO GAY!

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male:hey what that between your leggs female: my sisters penis

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Guy:Are you wearing space pants, cause that ass is out of this world! Girl:No, they're baseball pants, cuz this ass is out of your league.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!