Are you from Wales, because...well...

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Man: "Let's play Titanic. You'll be the Titanic, and I'll be the iceberg making you go down." Woman: "That would be a massive disaster."

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-Darling, I will never stop pursuing you. Even from the ends of the earth, I will follow you wherever you go. Really, I love you that much. -"Honey", I will call the police and have you thrown in jail for stalking me. Really, I hate you that much.

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Your parents must be assholes...because you're the shit.

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My dog just died so now you're my only Bitch.

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Guy: I think I got lost in your eyes. Girl: Here's a GPS. Go find yourself.

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You have a laugh like my favorite porn star.

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you look like my mother

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Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn.

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You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear

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Baby, I'm no Flintstone, but I can sure make your bed rock...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun so get in the van.

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Guy- Hey, wanna come back to my place? Girl- Umm... I don't think 2 people can fit in that box...

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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Man: I will make the rape on you now woman! Woman: Wow great Borat imitation bravo! Man: Borat who? *draws gun* Moral: Pretty immoral

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-Did you fall from heaven? Because your an angel -No but did you? Because your face is fucked up!

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Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

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-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

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Okay, now one where I actually succeeded okay? I know this is not like "goodpickuplines.com nor anything but hey... She: I used to have the nicest goldfish. Me: I got one myself. She: Really? Is it at your place? Me: Duh! She: Lol can we go see it? Me: Sure!... Oh wait... Oh, it died last week :( She: Can we like you know... still go see it? ;) *That sound you get when you score a billion billions on an arcade machine*

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McDonald's isn't the only thing that is super-sized...

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Boy: Are you Mc Donalds? Girl: Why because your loving it? Boy: No because ur fat and greasy!

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Are you an angel that fell from heaven? If you are, can I take a picture of you as proof that supernatural beings exist?

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him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

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M- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? W- I'm an atheist.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!