If I could rearrange the period table, I would put Uranium and Iodide together ;)

If i don't have sex in 30 seconds i'll have to kiss you

Sugar-free sugar cookies

Hey babe, are your parents arseholes? Because your the shit.

Man: (Ugh worst food ever). Girl: U like it? Man: I love it girl! Girl: Aww, I am gonna make this every day ever! Moral: Hey, if she got big tits, then keep lying.

Guy: Hey babe, do you have a GPS... I'm lost in your eyes. Girl: Make a U-Turn

"Is it true you're a lesbian?"

GET INTO DA CHOPPAH! Moral: IM LIEUTENANT JOHN KIMBLE! I HAVE A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS YOU HAVE TO ANSWER IMMEDIATELY! Whoos your daddy? YOU STAP IT! YOU IDIEOUT!

Man: Hey sexy, I think I have seen you many times before... Woman: Hmmm... I do not think I have seen you before... Man: Do you happen to be used to getting raped? Woman:...... Moral: yeah it was her :( Audience: BOOOOOOOOOO! Moral: I know :(

are you from tennessee? because your license plate said it.

Hey did you fall from Heaven? Cos I think you are angel. If I'd fallen from anywhere that high I'd be in hospital with serious injuries or dead. Do the logic.

"You look like an angel that fell from heaven and hit its face on the pavement."

Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

Nice Shirt. It would look better on my bedroom floor.

Male- You have 206 bones in your body, You want another ?

He: did it hurt? She: when i fell from heaven? He: no. when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. go put some clothes on.

How much does a whales weigh? How much? Just enough to make you look skinny.

At a huge bar only known as Castlevania... Woman: Get lost loser! Why would I wont pay you "tribute" you pervert! Man: It was not by my hand that I am once again given flesh.... I was called here by humans who wish to pay me tribute! Woman: What do you mean? You are totally insane and make no sense at all! Man: Perhaps the same could be said of ALL religions.,, Woman: You are quite the nutjob man... Man: What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets! But enough talk... Have at you! Woman: EEEK! Man: But what is this? Did I just attack a woman wearing a cross? Is your last name Belmont? Woman: Yeah So? Is there a problem with my HOLY CROSS! *Man on fire*: WHAT? THIS CANNOT BE! ARGH!!!!!!! Moral: Die monster! You don't belong in this world!

Roses are red. Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

He: I know all 21 letters of the Alphabet She: Isn't there 26?? He: Oh yeah...i keep forgetting URAQT

Roses are red Violates are blue Get in the van I have a gun.

girl, are you a christian? Sure... Do you believe in me? I dont even know you! Well, met God? No? You love him!

"Hey, I have the feeling i've seen you before somewhere..." "Well, could be, I used to be a porn actress.

boy - would you like to dance? girl - hell no! boy - I think you misunderstood me. I said you look fat in those pants. girl - That's why I said "Hell No!" girl - I'm trying to deny the fact that I look fat in my pants. boy - damnit! girl - Phew!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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