The word of the day is 'legs'. Wanna come to my place and spread the word?

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Damn you look good in beer goggles.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? I don't know. Quite a lot, actually.

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Man seriously? Free Samsung? And that Fiat, I been wondering how much you want for it, not that i got it but I was considering buying it sometime. Son, I got no idea what brand this piece of shit car is, but the wheels are cool. No really, if you mean it, ill take that Fiat man, man, ill kiss your feet, ill do it, no really I mean Really? I mean really really? Man If you mean it, ill get over there right away, and man, you can have dunno, bad times, hell ANYTHING Okay? But if you are just messing with me, you can go fuck yourself and your phone man!

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So which of you ladies wants to recieve child support payments from me next year?

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men: Do you ride horses, because I'd let you ride me all night!

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-I'll do anything,no matter how kinky it is if you can say it in three words. -Clean my house.

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- if I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U next to Y, just why

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Woman: Hey hot stuff! Are you new around he... Man: Eh, I am not comfortable with women hitting on me, even hot ones like you, its just uh... awkward and... Woman: uh sorry, its not like I was hitting on you nor anything ;), Why dont you hit on me? Man: Uh... I err.. how you... uh... *the guy proceeds to stare at the floor for the next five minutes then runs out crying* Moral: NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERD!

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Superman enters a bar: Superman: Ladies... who wants to try out my newly developed "super orgasmi-power"? Women: Did you not die? Superman: Uh no... it was just a uh... healing coma... *All the women fall into a "healing coma* Superman: *scratches head* Well... I kinda asked for this... Moral:*Healing coma*

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Guy: Hey, cutie! What's your name? Girl: JOHN CENA.

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On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

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Were your parents chemists? cuz you look like TEST TUBE BABY :D

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hello my name is pogo would you like to jump on my stick?

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I put the STD in Stud all I need is U

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If you and I were squirrels, I'd bust a nut in that hole.

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- you come here often? -i used to until you came here

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M. Haven't I seen you some place before? W. That's why I don't go there anymore

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I right next to each other. You say that you want me? Well don't what you come for!!

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Akshay Kumar's 'Special Chabbis' is a mind-action film, says director

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-Go on don't be shy, Ask me out. -Okay Go out.

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Man: Are you from heaven? Man: Cause ive got an erection

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Him. "I'd sure like to get into your pants." Her. "No thanks. One asshole in my pants is my limit."

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Are you a speeding, aggressive driver? Because your running straight up my ass

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!