Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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If you were Mufasa I'd help scar push you off the ledge

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Male: I'd give her one Female: I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last person on earth Male: I was rating you out of 10 you ugly bitch

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"You'll do."

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(Guy mumbles a bit, then says): You don't know me, but can I get you a drink? Yeah, sure... OK. HAHAHAA!!! Before I asked if you wanted a drink I mumbled "Do you want to have sex"? And you said yes! HAHAHAA!!!

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"Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?" "Yes. I ruptured my bowels upon impact."

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play R-a-p-e? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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Male: I'm all you've got good lookin' Female: then I must not have alot

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male: wanna come in for a coffea? female: ok (she has a coffea) male: ok by female: by

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- I'd go through anything for you. - Good! Let's start with your bank account.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because, I believe in the afterlife.

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If I asked you out on a date, would your answer to that question be the same as your answer to this question?

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hey baby do you fart? (much embaressed she awser)yeah,why? i knew that was a lie when they said that pretty girls don't fart

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hey wanna come back to my house, and help me kill my dog?

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-If I take you home, will you iron my clothes and make me a sandwich?

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Man: Hey, I've been kinda watching you through the night and I'd really be mad if I didn't talk to you tonight. So um, do you want to grab a bite to eat sometime or something? Woman: I'm married but you seem like a nice guy so yea... yea, I'd like that alot.

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-Can I get your Number? -29435566 (see if you can get it.)

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Man: How much does a polar bear weight? Girl: No idea... Man: Me either... By the way! Did you hear of the great blahblahblahblah that did blahalblahblah! Moral: Breaking the ice... easier than it seems...

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Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Female: Why? Male: Cus you look like an inbred hick

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M: Wanna play dynamite? W: what's that? M: I lie on my back and you blow the sh** out of me.

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Woman: Ugh I wish I could remember who you are, I mean you could even have Aids or H.I.V... Man: Hey yo don worry, Dogta tol `d I am positive so thats that Moral: The H.I.V awareness group was a message: We will go literally f/ck ourselves to death have a nice day.

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Adventures of Drunken man with standards 2: Man: Well you are kinda uh... big for me... no offense lady, I mean you are sexy but you are... well fat.. in fact you are TRUCKING HUGE! and I have standards, HIGH STANDARDS ACTUALLY... but since you are so charming and have such a great personality... I guess we can go for it... Kid: Mommy... what is that naked man doing to that blimp? Moral: Standards... we all got them... they are invisible for a reason though...

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-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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