I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

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BOY: Are you a chicken? GIRL: Why? BOY: Because I'll like you to lay on my eggs all day...

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-Hi. Didn’t we go on a date once? Or was it twice? -Must’ve been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

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Drunk woman enters what she thinks is a bar... (how original). "man gets close to her" Woman: You men are all dogs! Man: Bark bark! Woman: No need to get cheeky with me asshole! Man: Bark bark... Woman proceeds to pass out and wake up at a kennel... "Mandog": Bark bark. Moral: If you think every man is a dog, then you may just be bark barking the wrong tree... or place... I mean dont expect to find nice men at a dirty bar, and dont expect to find horny jerks at your church reunion. (A moral man original... and I actually like this one!)

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He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

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Hey there little girl there is a party down my pants you want to come? Oh I'm sorry i don't speak Herpes.

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Do you believe in love at first hear? Because ive never dated a blind chick before.

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Golf.

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You're like a drug to me. why because I'm so addicting?:) No, because you ruined my life.

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Wanna go back to my place and watch some CarVideos?

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It rubs the lotion onto it's skin

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"Don't scream"

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- Hey baby! You make my heart beat. - Oh, well you make my stomach churn.

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For you thinking what is that shit below this comment? Go fuck yourself, for those that wonder why I typed that excellence, well read whatever... So why am I here once a year and type a lot of insanity here? Because I am quitting smoking... AGAIN. So after banging two chicks (one my wife STEAKSAUCE!) I just want a smoke right? RIGHT? To chill the adrenaline... My wife does not smoke (well if you can smoke cock then she is still the best smoker in town) Seriously, Tina has Prince... That explains her breath ugh... I am gonna get one anyways for great justice.

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-Is that a sonic screwdriver in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? -Do I look like a Time Lord? (Only Doctor Who fans will get that.)

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M: On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight? F: North Korea

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If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

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"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

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Me: You know what bitch... You are *burp* such a bitch... That I am just gonna smear peanut butter on my crotch and... Lady: Dude, I am a man but okay! Me: You are a guy? Did you have to tell me that? I mean I got beer googles but I hear perfectly well! Then his girlfriend which happened to be my cousin showed up and... *facepalm*

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Lady: Is your name REAAAAAAAAALLY Moral? Moral: Stupid big titted bimbo... seems im getting laid tonight...just like I was today, and by midday and... yeah lie.. I mean brag a lot I do not have sex THAT many times a day... okay I lied again... Anyway vote me for president at least I am honest... well actually that was a lie but...

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Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa what I don't want for Christmas?

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What's your sign? Slippery when wet.

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Are you a speeding, aggressive driver? Because your running straight up my ass

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Sorry, I don't wanna date a guy who's best pickup line is cocaine.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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