B: Can I have your number ? G: Sure.. 666

- Does this napkin smell like chloroform to you? There is no response because she passed out from it and he leaves in order to void suspicion.

Man: May I please sit next to you for a brief moment? Woman: Sure :), you`re such a gentleman :). Man: Would you care for a bit of violent rapage in you`re anus?

- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

-You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -You look like a rapist.

This tux is rented by the hour, are you?

"I'd like to get you out of those clothes. Really, they aren't very flattering. That color looks awful on you and those pants make you look fat."

I am terribly sorry for talking to you, but I was wondering if...

Male: Do you know if there is an airport around here? Cause my heart took off, when I saw you... Female: Yeah? Well my heart crashed in the Hudson River when I saw you!

have met you before? i like eating my dogs shit.

- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

Got milk? Cuz baby, im of it!

How do you know where gonna have sex tonight.Im stronger than you.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun so get in the van.

- Hey, baby, are your parents retarded because you're pretty special.

Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

Ever kissed a bunny inbetween the ears? Nope. I'm allergic to them.

Sugar-free sugar cookies

Are you from Tennessee? Youre the only 10 i see, and im 59. I bet we could 69 beautifully.

Man: Hello! I am SUPERMAN! And you are so hot you are my Kryptonite! Woman: then you better get lost before you die! Man: Uh well... yeah uh... walks away (in non super speed strangely) Moral: Think things trough sometimes...

Hey lady, you're really, really cute! Let's go out in the woods, GET NAKED and have sex!

At a ... PUB! Man: Hey... wanna... go out with a true shinob i ninja? ;) Woman: Are you not supposed to be invisible or something? Man: You can see me? SHIT! (runs away). Moral: So what if she saw you you are all covered in a pajamas anyways...

if i see you naked i'll die happy Well if i see you naked i'l die instandly

Wanna have sex?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!