- Anti-Pickup Line

Five dollar women... WOO!

Okay, I lied, the one below actually kinda works, people get impressed, it is quite the accomplishment you know... But since I am gonna get married soon I don't pick up as much as I should anyways. Moral: Man

Ay Girl. Can I get yo digletts?

Guy: Hey is your dad a jeweler? Girl: No, He died a year ago due to a heart condition.

I put the STD in STUD, now all I need is U.

Why was the little boy crying? Because he dropped his hamster in the garbage disposal

You must be tired because you've been running through my mind all day! ...I'm a paraplegic, asshole.

Gaywatch starts

By reason or by Strength, moral man has a serious side too, and I prevail. Moral: Threats... anyone in my unit threatening another would simply be thrown in jail for a couple of weeks, then kicked out, and using military equipment to threaten, trace and murder people is highly illegal. Asshole, troll or not, I will use my right and reason to have you removed permanently from the horsehead network if you persist.

Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

- I know how to please a woman. - Then please leave me alone.

- I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true. - First wish: don't speak ever again.

Man: HELP! I am dying of disease and have only one day left to live! My only wish... "sob" is to procreate... to have a son or a daughter... Woman: Aww... well maybe I can help you... Man: :D I cant believe it (tears in eyes) Woman: What are you dying of? Man: Aids... Woman proceeds to disappear in a ball of smoke. Moral of the story: Dunno find it yourself ffs I dont even know why people read this crap... funny typing it though.. thumbs ups for that :D

Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

For you that think your family are too overprotective when it comes to sex, this was my story as a teenager. Mom: Hi guys! Me and ladyfriend: Hi mom! This is my ladyfriend: (insert your name if you are female) Dad: Woho! Good catch son! claps me on shoulder Mom: Dont worry, you guys just go right up and "study" eh ;) eh ;) and we are gonna put the music REALLY LOUD down here! And there is no need to be ashamed of stains nor anything. Dad: No we understand ;) ;) ;) Girl: Uh... you invited me just to study right? Me: Believe it or not I did... Dad: Yeah you two young ones go study! Remember condom though! ;) Girl: Axel! WTF?! leaves Me: Mom.. Dad! WTF!? I dont know anything about algebra (not even to this day, and I am almost 30) Dad: Algebra eh? ;) Next time give her a good "algebra". Me: Mom tell that moron tha... Mom: Relax son, I understand that you boys have desires and the next time you take her with you, you dont need to be ashamed or come up with excuse.. Me: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! Moral: To believe I learned most my ways by having ladyfriends... despite my parents... Mom and Dad overprotective? Good... trust me!

Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'U' and 'I' together. - No, it's okay. 'N' and 'O' are already together.

A: Did I see you walking out of that bar or was it an angel? :D B: I'm your mom you pervert.

Shall I compare you to a summer's day? Damn you're hot!

Jdkfk

on a scale from 1 to 10, when did you lose your virginity?

Walking to your car alone later?

M: If life had Alt + F4, I would close your clothes. F: Really? I would close YOU down!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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