- Anti-Pickup Line

- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

- I'd go to the end of the world for you - Good,Stay There

- Did you fall from heaven? - No, I dug my way up from Hell.

Wow, Adrenal exhaustion due to overextansive sex... I lost to a woman dude (yeah you too eriksen you faggot) doctor says I need to stay away from any strainous activities at least a while, and hard sex for at least six hours... Six hours is nothing! I lost only the first round! Bahahahahahaha! Remember those ridiculous hentays, no its typing it wrong dont type listen my waifu not my (wife) is quoting me as I am feverish and throwing up and anxious, anyways those animes where bunch of women would win (dunno I did not understand Japanese then, not even the subtitles) pay the rent forever smileyface draw a smileyface (sorry Harry no idea how to draw here) My god, Harris, you know who is quoting me here, she is the fucking stupid one XD yes that is smileyface XD! Anyway, I was defeated here, This "just" some woman, fucked me sick... I am laughing here, I dont care if nobody reads it, I feel sick as shit, and yet I am in heaven... Bakakakakaka... IM NO CHICKEN YOU IDIOT ITS H`S sorry babe, no you moron dont include your name, you are all my miserable pile of secrets kastlevania lol she is tryng as hard as she can to quote me here. Oh and I know you like her, she is red laughing with me here, Wakawakwakwaka yes you got packman right NOOOO mor big OOOS XD Its P A C M A N... XD Why the spaces? Okay, just having fun from this side now, since they are just terrible quotes and not my direct words WITH HORRIBLE LACK OF SPACING I DID NOT SPACE THE HALF THIS, I AM JUST PISSING WAIFU OFF HERE OF IS WITH ONE F! XD XD YES EXDE NO THE SMILEY AGAIN XD Anyway "Harris" Nero is being a bit too Metal here, "abusing himself a bit too much" as they say.. WHO SAYS THAT? YOU SOME PRINNY NANNY? Okay I will shut up, why are you quoting everything? Okay, post it, what you looking at me like that for? POst it? Its not too long! You are making it longer... AND HARDER! cOME ON NOW POST IT... (My God, they do not call this guy Metal for nothing, I know its just Horsehead, but this dude is loco. BITCH COME HERE I AM NOT LOCO I AM INSANO! CAPTAIN INSANO! "THIS DUDE? YOU KNOWN ME FOR OVER FIVE YEaRs YOU SLUT! STOP DARING ME, POST IT ALL AND STOP CAPPING MY LETTERS I CAN BARELY SPEAK coughcough (sound of slime) HEY STOP THAT! Okay her Name is Natalia was it Ember? WIFE NUMBER ONE MAKE HER POST HER REAL NAME SO PEOPLE K (wife Number one here, Natalia Embers, yeah, people as Nero says, so nobody shall messeth with the goddeth of darkneseth and loveth" YES I AM SURE THY SHALL POST IT! WHy remove caplock ffs, XD, now post it, I Nero Metal take full responsability jumå... No more spaces There you go, I Nero "Metal" Lastnameredacted take full responsability for this ridiculously long comment (not my words I think its perfect length just like my dick) And if it crashes this piece of shit sitedotdotdot...yeah those babe. THEN I SHALL BE KNOWN AS THE MAN THAT DESTROYED THE INTERWEBS WITH HENTAI AND SEXHAUSTION! IT SHALL BE LEGENDARY! Seriously, post it, come on, ok we can change the name, its not the name it says, we were just toyi... Will you just post tht thing? No dont remove anything, post it, because I am Insane and insane means 2 wifes and about everyone else... Ok? Ok... Final note: Thou Harris of nameth shall readeth all this a hundred and fifthy say thousand times, or car thy shall be redacted. JAYKAY... No dumbass just kidding, no dont delete it, im having fun, allright allright sorrey I called you dumbass I was taking to "name" that is typing this not you, what you worried about, I am just tired... POST IT COME ON! NO I AM NOT ASHAMED I AM GOD GOD KNOWS NO SHAME SO POST IT, PS DARKGOD GOOD WORK "NOT SHARING MY NAME HERE" GOOD GIRL; NOW GET OVER HERE YOUR FRIEND NEARLY RAPED ME TO DEATH, YES POST IT I DARE YOU! YOU DO NOT DARE ME, THIS COMMENT TRIGGERS THE APOCALYPSE YOU WACKONutS THEN MAKE IT HAPPEN! MAKE ME THE usHERER OF THE END! seriously will one of you please just agree to the terms and nuke the world with this comment? Fine ill do it mysself, HAH THE cOMPUTER IS AGAIN MINE! YOU MUST ALL READ THIS UNTIL YOUR EYEs BLEED BECAUSE THEsE ARE THE WORDS OF.. I dont know, just post it, please? Please do not make me kick your ass out of my room? Thank you very much, ASHAMED? ME ASHAMED OF TYPING THE COMMENT THAT WILL RUIN THE WOLRD? GIRL THY ARE NUTHS, AND YOU REALLY KNOW HOW TO SPELL WORLD POST IT NOW! YEs I AM SURE!

The word of the day is 'legs' , The word of tomorrow is Aardvark .

-My girlfriend and I want different things out of our relationship. -She wants marriage, children and a house. -I just want out.

Sung to the melody of Ozzy`s: "Moral Man" HEES THE MORAL MAN, IIIS HEE MORAL OR IS HE DEAD? HEES THE MORAL MAN AAARE THERE MORALS INSIDE HIS HEEAD. Moral: NOOO THERE ISNT! ONLY IMMORAL INSIDE! AND ILL KEEP POSTING, ONLY TO CRUSH YOUR INSIDES! guitar solo begins

Did it hurt? Did what hurt? When you fell from heaven.. and crushed all the people below (for a fat girl)

Pick up lines from the stoneage: Man: RARGH GROG BEAT YOU WITH CLUB! AND MAKE THE LITTLE GROGS WITH YOU! Woman: But I just had one! Aww not this again whatever... Moral: And over time women adjusted to clubs and often end up knocked up when passing out in them, While men that own their own clubs usually end up knocking up a lot more of them... Some things never change...

Business Y U No Advertise?

-Hey, what's your sign? -I don't know, but yours must be Cancer.

Hey baby, let me take you to heaven.

Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

Dating tips 101: First you find a girl that likes you. Then you realize no girl likes you. Moral: Lesson done.

Walking to your car alone later?

Girl: Hey you cutypie! want to ride my newest pimpmobile and get drunk and have unprotected sex? Man: Gee that was mighty brave of you, teehee.. Maybe though, but cant we just get to know each other a bit first? ;) I mean I am a partygirl bu.. Girl: ...Uh, something feels wrong here. Man: Cut! I think we picked up each other scripts... Moral: About mother fucking time someone noticed something! This is anti-pickupline enough for me...

Knock Knock... Who's there Want Want who Want who fuck

Girl: Hey classy older man, wanna get to know me better? Man: Sigh... sorry lady I am the man that played Gandalf in that... shitty lords of something movie... Girl: so what? Man: Sigh... you know.. Gandalf the white and Gandalf the gay...? Girl: Huh? Man: Ever seen the X-men? Girl: Yeah... Man: ONE WORD: FAGNETO! Girl: uh.. okay.. "leaves". Ian McKellen: Sigh... should have come out of the closet sooner...

Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

Are you from Wales, because...well...

Sigh, reminds me I am banging a girl named Tina, and one named Line right? Plus my wife whose name I wont reveal because she matters (Line, Tina, you do not!) Anyway, when people ask me "what the hell was that noise Nero (No idea what Neronism is, fuck him for stealing my name) I tell them "meh I was just screwing Line and Tina" People always go like... Man... YOU DONT HAVE TO LIE TO ME SON! YOU GOT STREET CRED HERE MODAFOCA! Tina and Line? You cant come up with better names SON? EH? If you wanna lie to me again SON, Then you get some original names SON! And I go like... So, can your sister sit down now? And he goes all like SHEET, was that you? Nice score man! And then I went "thats your sister you know that right?" Anyway, you want me now? INSTA ANTI PICKUPLINE... BECAUSE WHO NEEDS PICKUPLINES AT ALL! I AM JUST BEING MEEEEEEEEEEE! AND YOU MIGHT HATE ME!!!!!!! BUT YOU WOMEN STILL END UP TALKING ABOUT HOW YOU HATE THAT GUY YOU FUCKED LAST NIGHT! AND YOUR GIRLFRIENDS! Man... I need another Smoke... SMOKE WINS FAILTALITY. Ps: Yo Harris, stop congratzing me for banging your sister, she is not a nice catch for youz! She is your sistah DUDE! STOP GIVING ME THE THUMBS UPS EVERYTIME SHE COMPLAINS HER ASS IS STILL SORE... I mean does he get it? Or does youz congrats me because you dont understand that Rebecca your "innocent" sister is really into anal something I usually just reserve for the... actually good girls...

You're so hot I'd do you sober.

-You know I've always had a thing for blondes -thats funny, i've always had a thing for girls

Man: Your tag's showing. It says "Made in Heaven". Woman: Proceeds to leak period blood into a puddle at the man's feet and walks away in silence

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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