Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Man: HEY BITCH! LETS HAVE SEX! Damn ugly woman: OKAY! Next day... Man: Damn that was some nice sex, too bad the bitch was damn ugly though, even trough the beer googles... I wonder where she is... "damn ugly woman": woof woof! Bark bark! Moral: Do you see any moral in this immoral piece of shit? (Ps if you are stupid, the bitch was actually a dog... get it?)

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Are you from tennessee? Cause you've got fine written all over you.

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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Man: "Are you a parking ticket? 'Cos you have fine written all over you!" Woman: "Are you an a**hole? 'Cos you're hairy and you smell like s**t!"

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-Hey babe, wanna go to my place and bang all night long? -No you freak. -Well, I gave you a choice.

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I like your eyes. My eyes don't like you.

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Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

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-Want to get on your knees and suck my dick? -No thanks, I have enough Tic Tacs at home.

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guy scientist: hey can i send a probe to explore uranus? girl scientist: hey can i send a rocket with you in it to the sun/

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Male - Your a sight for sore eyes Female - And your a sight that causes sore eyes

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roses are red violets are blue i have a knife get in the van

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Your eyes are the color of my toilet water.

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Girlfriend: you are much more naive when you are naked, and a small penis, no hair and are 23 years old

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If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

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if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

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Guy: Do you like me? Girl: No Guy: ..... Girl: You didn't ask me if I loved you! Guy: Do you love me? :D Girl: No

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guy: wanna make some money? girl: Na, I do it for free, i'm offering free herpes

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Man, no im still waiting,need to get my kids, hope its fine son, okay punches, captain falcon, but you break my jaw, I wont even ask for you to pay the bill, ill expect it. Man, good times, honestly, i was not even drunk, I was high as shit, never again tho, they did not tell me it was "magic tobacco" until I started seeing numbers NUMBAS! Hey, mind if I come stay sometime? I mean we really miss you son, you always at the fuckhouse now. Just me and... Well the gang... Just like the twelve of us, tell me who you dont want to invite and ill bounce him out for you. Man dog, that chick I punched down was pretty as fuck, she would have been my wife... Anyway just fucking happy finally a real car dude! If she fucks you to death, you gonna go out young and a Legend among gods, let her keep on sucka! (just don forget bout my sis huh? She asks about you too fucking much already) Man, you got me typing almost as much as you dog, anyway is you know, in four hours allright? If not screw my kid, I need a car ill get him a cab.

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He: Will we have sex tonight? She: Yes, only I don't know with who you will.

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-Get in the Van

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Guy: Where have you been all my life? Girl: In my room hiding from you.

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I walked into the pub last night with a date and said to the barman, "I'll have a pint of Guinness." My date immediately looked at me and said, "Aren't you forgetting something?" "Of course, how rude of me." I said, "I'll have a pint of Guinness PLEASE."

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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