A couple wanted to try something different in the bedroom, The wife suggests they do it in a 69 position so they get into position but the wife lets one off in the husbands face she apologises and they try again when the wife farts again the husband gets up to leave and says no I don't think I can do this another 67 times!

i wanna see your dick? i cant seem to find it...... sorry

-Your father must be an alien because your out of this world -More like out of your league

- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

-Hey babe, wanna go to my place and bang all night long? -No you freak. -Well, I gave you a choice.

Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

Your teeth remind me of a song Which one? Black and Yellow

Put the lotion on the skin!

Can you leave your door unlocked and your underwear drawer open when you go to work?

- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put I and U together. - Would you also change it so that I is an object, therefore making your previous sentence grammatically correct? And besides, I already organized the alphabet so that N and O are right next to each other.

I AM FAGNETO! WELCOME TO GAY!

Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

Shaved your beard, so I can see you're a woman.

If your happy and you know it clap your hands!! What if I lost my hands in Nam while I was singing this song and a plane killed my friend causing me to ct off both of my hands?

Me: Hey lady, you are so fucking hot I want to... Lady: FUCK ME PLEASE ME SO HORNY! Moral: One can always dream... *yawn* Zzzzzzzmooth...

It's not Rapee If you yell surprise!

Are you an angel? 'Cause you're the only ten I see.

McDonald's isn't the only thing that is super-sized...

Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

Lol, waifu and Rebecca are like "do you have to type so much? Come back prince charming... ...I Am all NO! AND CALL ME MASTER BISON. SO ANYWAY SHORT coMMENT SEE? I DONT HAVE TO TYPE AS MUCH! AND NOW THAT THEY ARE ALL LAUGHING BECAUSE OF MY SHEET HERE I JUST KEEP TYPING YOU KNOW BECAUSE THEY ARE HANGING OVER ME AND I CANT MOVE.:: GIrls read this: (not you ladies not yet, I am talking about my gals here) IF YOU WANT ME TO JOIN YOU, MOVE THE FUCK OVER TO EACH OF YOUR SIDES, SO I CAN GET UP, YOU CAN SQUEEZE ON TOP OF EACH OTHER SO I CAN DO YOU BOTH. Lol Rebecca is all like "He is not really posting that stuff right? "Hey Nero you are not going to post that stuff are you? Lol Harris, does your sister know me again? Ps: Dont worry folks, I mean Harris is like my bro from another ho, seriously, I bang his sister, he goes like "THERE IS A GOOD CATCH SON!" And kept giving me the thumbs ups when she liked Anal too much and could not sit. ANYWAYSSSSSSS SHORT COMMENT GET! (Sorry id type more, but I think my dick is alive again... IT MUST DROWN IN THE JUICES OF WITCHES OF ENCHANT! "I wont post this Rebecca? Lol, you know why I do not care about their opinion Rebecca lady" BECAUSE I AM AWESOME, AND THEY ARE NOOOOOOOOOOT! Oh you do not want your bro to know... Rebbeca chan... Your bro just sent me a thumbs ups and "take good care of her bro" Yeah let me put this incredibly good laptop away and show you. Ps: SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOORT!

Mmm baby....I want you to stick your Gaberwalkie in my bandersnatch.. ;)

"Hey can I get your number?" "-12 Like the inches of your dick."

Does this rag smell of chloroform to you?

Guy- I would do anything for you. Women- I wouldn't do you for anything!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!