Girl: Hey you cutypie! want to ride my newest pimpmobile and get drunk and have unprotected sex? Man: Gee that was mighty brave of you, teehee.. Maybe though, but cant we just get to know each other a bit first? ;) I mean I am a partygirl bu.. Girl: ...Uh, something feels wrong here. Man: Cut! I think we picked up each other scripts... Moral: About mother fucking time someone noticed something! This is anti-pickupline enough for me...

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-You wanna get laid tonight? -You wanna never have sex again?

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Dude: Did you fart? Girl: No Dude: Oh I'm sorry because you blew me away

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Is that a ladder in your tights or are you just a cheap whore?!

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Online Desperate Asians.com Man: Wow you are a cute asian girl! Where are you from? Girl: Thanks my name Aoi is I am from Japan, you look like nice older man! Man: Japan? Awesome! Remember when we nuked the hell out of your country? Happy days! SLAP A JAP! *Connection discontinued* Man: Eh really sorry, I just get nervous when I meet girls especially the cutest ones... Man: hello?

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-Why is one breast bigger than the other? -because I popped it and all the silicone leaked out

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So I caught my sister masturbating the other day, it was like lol hahaha you filthy bitch! Then she was like DONT TELL ANYBODY PLEASE I WILL BUY YOU THOSE BOXING GLOVES YOU WANTED SO MUCH! PLEASE! And I was like, NUHUUUH! The bed is full of piss and I totally got this on my cellphone, so you gonna pull up your panti... Oh you still looking for them LOL! Yeah, that was the subject I brought up at a bar... Sober, unless Redbull counts as drunk... Anti Pickupline as FUCK! Players Dont Use RedBull -Richard Nixon or whatever.

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Whats best about having sex with twenty six year olds?..... Theres twenty of them!

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what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

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roses are red violets are blue My dog gives me a bigger orgasm then you

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Man: Lady... Seriously, I got a PhD! Woman: Seriously, you look more like an athlete, in what? Man: Lady... I got a pretty huge Richard. Moral: RICHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS!

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guy: can i rape you? girl: No Guy: great that means any sex we have from now on is consensual, thanks

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I want to F*** you with a rake.

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I have a really big..... Bank Account

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Female: Hey do you wanna buy me a drink? Male: I really don't like your face.

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-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

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guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

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"I lost my virginity! Can I have yours?"

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i wanna see your dick? i cant seem to find it...... sorry

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I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

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-I know you want to ask me out. I am free anytime. -Ok, then go out.

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Did it hurt? Did what hurt? When you fell from heaven.. and crushed all the people below (for a fat girl)

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Couple in bed: Woman: I want some variation... you into roleplay? Man: Sure! Woman: Ok, Ill be a hot housemaid... Man: OK but they have little mana so... ill be a firemage! Woman: Huh? Man: SHHHH! its not your time to attack yet! Moral: Geeks...

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- Do you wanna play the rape game? - NO! - That's the spirit!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!