Are you an erection? 'Cause you're growing on me.

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Soon

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Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

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Boy: Wanna go see a movie. Girl: Which movie. Boy: Texas Chainsaw Massicure. Girl: What is it about. Boy: Unicorns and Rainbows. Girl: Let's go!

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I scream, You scream, The Police come, It's Awkward...

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Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

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roses are red violets are twisted bend over b**** your about to get fisted

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At a bar... sigh... Woman: Hey cutie wanna go home? "Man" hello I am twelve... what is this? Moral: Hello I am eight... what is this?

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I have never dated a horse-faced woman before :)

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guy: hey do you know how to sly a dragon? girl:No. guy: well your no help.

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are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

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Super man and Lois lane doing it... Supes: WOMAN I AM SO uh.. tHORNY that I want to thrust as hard as I can and... Lois: YAAAAAAAAAAARGH! Supes: Oh noes! R.I.P Lois Lane... Ripped In Pieces Indeed... Moral: Hey at least moral man can get laid... (a moral man fake... well actually original)

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A 85 year old man was at a bar, he goes up to the first hot thing he sees and asks do I come here often?

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Is Heaven missing an Angel? Because I have an erection.

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Hey nice shoes....Wanna F***?

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Hey, I your dad a baker?...Cuz it would be really cool if he were a baker.

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Boy: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Girl: Did it hurt when you were thrust through the ash-filled layers of Hell?

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My wife does not know it but every time we have sex I put a dollar aside to go toward her Christmas present. So far she is getting a cup of coffee.

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Baby if you were homework, I would do you all the time

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Hey baby, are you Star Trek? Because I watch you every night in the darkness.

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man: you look like my favorite girl. Girl: is that so? Man: yupp, best dog i ever had.

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male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

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You have lovely eyes. They'll look better in a pile on my floor in the morning.

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Man: Lady... Seriously, I got a PhD! Woman: Seriously, you look more like an athlete, in what? Man: Lady... I got a pretty huge Richard. Moral: RICHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!