-Hey sit on my face and I will guess your weight

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- Haven't I seen you someplace before? - Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.

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Grapist: I bet you like getting Graped, tied up and beaten muahahahahaha! I am so gonna do the worst things to you! Woman: YES PLEASE! Man: MAAAAAAAAAAAN your not fun anymore... Moral: Its not grape if she wants it... and I guess grapists dont like that... remember that girls whenever someone is gonna rape you just say YES unless they yell surprise though... then its surprise sex.

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haha

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Hey baby that dress is amazing! It would look even better as a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor!

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Pick up lines from the stone age: Fail. Man: Hello, you look beautiful, I speak very well, and if you allow me to make love with you, I promise I will protect you and raise the child with you :)! Woman: WHAT? A guy without wild chesthair that speaks instead of grunting and yelling? You to sex me and you do not even got a club? I am SOOO gonna go to Grogg instead! He has like the biggest club and knows how to really HIT a woman! Moral: I would say somethings do change, but Id rather be Grogg than the loser above, of course I prefer hitting ON women first, if that does not work I... Oh right, I am married :P

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Do you believe in angels? Cool, what about goblins?

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Superman enters a bar: Superman: Ladies... who wants to try out my newly developed "super orgasmi-power"? Women: Did you not die? Superman: Uh no... it was just a uh... healing coma... *All the women fall into a "healing coma* Superman: *scratches head* Well... I kinda asked for this... Moral:*Healing coma*

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Low confidence edition: Woman: Hi there cutie, you new here? Guy: Lady, believe me I am out of your league. Woman: You look really nice and I was wondering if... Guy: No really, believe me, I am boring and a virgin, but my mom says I am nice, but pfft no, just stop wasting your time and giving me false allusions please... Moral: Someone kill that faggot!

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HE ; " MY NAME'S BOND, JAMES BOND" SHE;" MY NAME'S ****, **** OFF!"

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Have you been followed? 'Cuz i've been seeing people behind your back.

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whats it like being the only beautiful girl in the world? Whats it like having the smallest dick in the world?

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So when' the baby due?

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A polar bear and a penguin were taking a bath. The polar bear asked the penguin to pass the soap. the penguin responded by saying,"What do i look like a microwave?"

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How can you tell if an elephant has been in your fridge? Broken fridge.

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-Can I have your number? -Can my boyfriend punch you in the face?

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-hey, come here a minute.

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Were your parents chemists? cuz you look like TEST TUBE BABY :D

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What's the difference between a duck? An orange

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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I like your eyes. My eyes don't like you.

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Want to get a pizza and fuck? What you don't like pizza?

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- Grab your coat, you've pulled - Okay, Bye!

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He: Will we have sex tonight? She: Yes, only I don't know with who you will.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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