- Ma'm, do you have a cigarette? - I don't really want one, I just wanted to start a conversation with you.

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Fear not moral man is back, in a moment of weakness I let myself go... let us put it this way... some like me, some hate me, that is what happens when people such as I speak their opinion. And if someday the entire world wants to destroy Moral Man... Moral Man will unleash doomsday! Moral: I am back, like me, hate me, you can still ignore me... but until I get some sleep and can start working out again (icy weather is not for bicycling is it?) Then Moral Man stands... Ps: Hey, thanks there below, my most thumbed up comments had minus 5 and such, so I got kinda down since I thought the internet too needed someone that speaks his mind. More Morals: But then I remembered I do this to entertain myself, and that you downvoters can all go screw yourselves! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAN! MORAL MAAAAAAAAN! Action figures in store now!

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- hey baby i wanna show you something - wait i wanna show you something too -what is it? -my fists

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Can I have your number? -I don't have one.

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Guy: (Walks up to girl) "I do not think it is a girls body that makes her special, it is her personality that really counts". Girl: "Well that's to bad because you can't have sex with my personality". (Then walks away)

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Male: I would die for you... Female: Prove it

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, id put my dick in your mouth.

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- I can make your bed rock. - Oh yeah? An earthquake can too..

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My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

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I heard this one in real life in Spain, pretty good one: Man: Please marry me! I am nothing without you! Woman: If you are worth nothing then why should I want you? Man: Uh... Moral: Its a great honor having a dedicated group of followers making sure my comments always have red thumbs, thanks to this my sociology studies are complete. My thanks to every azzhole out there.

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"Don't scream"

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Handsome rich looking man: I would like to take you somewhere nice, maybe watch a movie at the cinema, then we could go to my place and have a romantic dinner.. finally... Girl: YES YES! Man: as I was saying... Finally I can make sweet love with your dog...if its fine by you... Girl: wtf?

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-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

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I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

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M. you have a sweet pussy. W. WHAT!? M. Your cat, she is very friendly

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Wherever: Hi I am Tom Green! or Hey there, I am Jamie Kennedy! Moral: Hey there I am neither one of them, I am however the worlds third most pointless invention according to this site. (well strictly spoken, I am a lawyer, lol self irony)

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Man: Do you sleep on your stomach? Woman: No... Man: Can I?

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Guy: Is it hot in here or did i just break the ice? Girl: No, it was your weight.

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I AM FAGNETO! WELCOME TO GAY!

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imgonna r@pe you

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I may not be the best looking guy in the room, but I'm the only one talking to you.

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He: I know all 21 letters of the Alphabet She: Isn't there 26?? He: Oh yeah...i keep forgetting URAQT

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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- OMG, OMG, OMG, Terry finally said he will go out with me! -OMG, When? -February 30th! -Stacey, There is no February 30th.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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