The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Not as much as my dick.

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Hello I am a violent rapist, oh wait I meant to say my name first and the other much later... Moral: its official you suck!

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Man - "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" Woman - "Yes it does."

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - U and me - Grammer freak

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Yo girl... My feelings keep growing, I just have to say it, but it might be too soon, it might even risk our friendship. Awww, just say it. Ok girl, I hate you more for every day, you fucking ugly bitch, if it where not for your money, id leave right away. Moral: Its not about what you want, its about what you need, therefore I decided I only need whatever I want, case closed.

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Are you from Wales, because...well...

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Man: "Let's play Titanic. You'll be the Titanic, and I'll be the iceberg making you go down." Woman: "That would be a massive disaster."

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Guy: How much does a polar bear way? Girl; About 500 kilograms

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-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

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Your parents must be assholes...because you're the shit.

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My dog just died so now you're my only Bitch.

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You have a laugh like my favorite porn star.

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You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear

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Baby, I'm no Flintstone, but I can sure make your bed rock...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun so get in the van.

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Boy: Are you Mc Donalds? Girl: Why because your loving it? Boy: No because ur fat and greasy!

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Are you an angel that fell from heaven? If you are, can I take a picture of you as proof that supernatural beings exist?

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M- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? W- I'm an atheist.

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McDonald's isn't the only thing that is super-sized...

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him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

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Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

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Guy : your looking well! Girl: awh thanks Guy: You must have shaved this morning.....waaaaaay

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i'm a doctor.... maybe i can fix that thing you call a face

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!