Woman: Hey is it true you black men have big penises? Black Man: Hell yeah woman! Mine is so big, its at least three times longer than my fist and at least 4 times as wide! Lets go get some hoe! Woman: Uh... well uh... its just that... uh... Moral: Be careful for what you wish for, when fantasy becomes reality... it may hurt....

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McDonald's isn't the only thing that is super-sized...

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It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

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Guy: what do this pickup line and your face have in common? Girl: what? Guy: they are both poorly constructed.

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Man:Hey, do you know what chloroform smells like? Woman:No. Man:Well, you're about to find out.

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-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

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Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

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Glass Basketball

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Man - "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" Woman - "Yes it does."

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As long as I have a face, you will always have a place to sit.

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Your the penisbutter to my vagmite;)

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Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

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You're like a can of condensed milk. Short, thick, and sweet.

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My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

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-What's your name sexy? -Taken!

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Me: it smells in here Her: its maybe my perfume! Me: no i let a glorious fart fallowed my an ass crapping on my foot

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Is that a keg in your pants? Cause I'd like to tap that ass.

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Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

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- What's a shabby girl like you doing in a lovely place like this?

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Guy: You must put sugar in your cereal every morning... Girl: Why cause I am so sweet :) Guy: No because you haven't been able to see your toes in at least 20 years...

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Does the carpet match the drapes? -Do I look bald?

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Man: Do you want to have sex at my house Women: No

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Walking to your car alone later?

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- I can tell that you want me. - Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!