Male: You are a Drugs? Female: Why? because your so addicted to me? Male: Nope, You ruined my life!

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Male: Did you get your tickes to the barbercue? Female: What barbercue? Male: The barbercue where i put my meat on your face.

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Like my status for a tbh? Cause to be honest you are the prettiest girl I ever met ;) Like MY status for a tbh? cause to be honest, thats old and No one gets on Facebook. Twitter all the way :p Oh did I say prettiest? I meant b*tchiest you are horrible at comebacks. So your dumb too! -__________-

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Hey big girl ;), why you alone? You ate all of your friends?

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, id put my dick in your mouth.

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I hope you know CPR, because you so ugly you take my breath away

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Sorry, I don't wanna date a guy who's best pickup line is cocaine.

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Wanna go back to my place and watch some CarVideos?

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Girl, you must have fallen from heaven...because you're dead.

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Male: "Why does it feel like the most beautiful girl in the world is in this room?" Female: "Because you're here"

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How does a ghost walk through walls? There's normally a door.

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-I'm addicted to yes, and I'm allergic to no. So what's it gonna be? -I'll start dialing 911 for you now.

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I love you more than my jar of fingers.

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all in all it was a good orgy

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In a loud bar: Man: Do you enjoy gRape? Woman: HOW DARE YOU YOU PERVERT! Man: Uh... how about raisins then... Woman: Err... can you repeat that first question again... Moral: I would but I would have to bypass the censorship somehow...

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Van what van? GET TO THE CHOPPAH!

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-I'll do anything,no matter how kinky it is if you can say it in three words. -Clean my house.

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are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

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baby please dont make this rape turn into a murder

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Little guy: I also beat Mike Tyson with my fists! Woman: Meh, from what I heard you beat some nobody named Mr.Dream! Little guy: Damn you Nintendo! Moral: He sure was not a big mac... more like a little ma.. baaaah you wont get it anyways!....

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Man: HEY BITCH! LETS HAVE SEX! Damn ugly woman: OKAY! Next day... Man: Damn that was some nice sex, too bad the bitch was damn ugly though, even trough the beer googles... I wonder where she is... "damn ugly woman": woof woof! Bark bark! Moral: Do you see any moral in this immoral piece of shit? (Ps if you are stupid, the bitch was actually a dog... get it?)

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what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

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so... you're a girl,huh?

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd take you out back in the shed and screw you!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!