Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

At bar Man: Uh... um... wanna come home see my star wars board games collection? Woman: SURE! Man: *Heart attack*

Guy: Girl, I wish you were a car door, cause I'd slam you all night Girl: Well I have a car, how about I run you over with it instead?

Damn girl! You`re fat and ugly! its ok though, cuz Im desperate!

Boy: Do you have a boyfriend? Girl: I don't have a boyfriend but I have a Girlfriend !

WHEN I ACTUALLY DIE SOME PEOPLE ARE GOING TO GET REALLY HAUNTED. Originally Posted at: Collection of Funny WhatsApp Status

There's a reason why they call my penis the Bunker Buster.

Dude: Do you have insurance on you ass? Gal: Why? Dude: Because Im about to hit it. Gal: I hope you have insurance on your face (punch).

Q: What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? A: My zipper.

Online Desperate Asians.com Man: Wow you are a cute asian girl! Where are you from? Girl: Thanks my name Aoi is I am from Japan, you look like nice older man! Man: Japan? Awesome! Remember when we nuked the hell out of your country? Happy days! SLAP A JAP! *Connection discontinued* Man: Eh really sorry, I just get nervous when I meet girls especially the cutest ones... Man: hello?

Was your dad a thief? Because he's in jail

You stole my heart..... Don't worry, i have three more back home in my freezer.

Your the penisbutter to my vagmite;)

Man: "Did you fall from heaven? 'Cause it looks like you landed on your face"

"Hey can I get your number?" "-12 Like the inches of your dick."

Roses are red, something something, I am just too desperate to concentrate please let me just put it in you.

hey angel you duh sexy , if you duh rice i eat you everyday-pha haha

Guy: Are you looking for a hot, sexy, fertile young man? Girl: No thanks, I used to be one.

Man: Hey is your name Zelda? Woman: Huh? What kind of stupid name is THAT! Man: EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME PRINCESS! Woman: What a dork... Moral: The man did not link with the woman that night... nor ever it seems...

Your father must have been a theif, because you look like a pikiey

What did the priest say to the rabbi? We are both religious figures at the head of our places of worship.

He: How do you like your eggs in the morning? She: Unfertilised!

Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

Can you leave your door unlocked and your underwear drawer open when you go to work?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!