NO WAIT SON ITS 999 FUCK COME ON! DONT GO "NERO SAYS WITH ME SON!" I mean that shit you pull on everyone, come on man, I posted wrong... Yeah your word is law and all that So can we like make a deal? You pay my repair wreck of a car and you can slash the damn tires yourself if you wanna later?

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So I caught my sister masturbating the other day, it was like lol hahaha you filthy bitch! Then she was like DONT TELL ANYBODY PLEASE I WILL BUY YOU THOSE BOXING GLOVES YOU WANTED SO MUCH! PLEASE! And I was like, NUHUUUH! The bed is full of piss and I totally got this on my cellphone, so you gonna pull up your panti... Oh you still looking for them LOL! Yeah, that was the subject I brought up at a bar... Sober, unless Redbull counts as drunk... Anti Pickupline as FUCK! Players Dont Use RedBull -Richard Nixon or whatever.

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I like my women like I like my coffee I drink Tea

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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*on Halloween* Male: My name's Dick, and you're a very pretty PUSSY-cat. Female: I'll cut off your penis.

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-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

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Mom im sixteen and after watching some japanese cartoons and dads gone, I wonder if I can... Son please put your pants back on! But mom! Im the man in the house now, so I invited my friends so you and I can have a stamina sex contest and... Moral: If she does not tell you to put up your pants... Well, you are the man in the house son ;)

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You know, I had a great pickup line, but I just forgot it.

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"Hey can I get your number?" "-12 Like the inches of your dick."

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boy - would you like to dance? girl - hell no! boy - I think you misunderstood me. I said you look fat in those pants. girl - That's why I said "Hell No!" girl - I'm trying to deny the fact that I look fat in my pants. boy - damnit! girl - Phew!

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Boy: You know the keyboard says that U and I are together. Girl: It also says JK

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Are you an angel that fell from heaven? If you are, can I take a picture of you as proof that supernatural beings exist?

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Man: Hey! Are you into stuff like violence robbery rape cheating orgies machismo torture and pedophilia? ;) ;) Girl: WHAT? NO! Man: Ok me neither so you qualify to come home with me. Girl: Well... that honestly makes you better than most of the lot... why not... so yeah lets go!

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Nero: My name is Nero... Woman: Why I mean you aint black? Nero: Sure about that? Moral: In the Darkness... We are all the same...

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Man: Do you work at Subway? Girl: Why? Did I just give u a 6 inch?

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Boy: Are you Mc Donalds? Girl: Why because your loving it? Boy: No because ur fat and greasy!

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Why are you crying? I have to walk out these woods alone!

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cockface

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If I could rearange the alphabet id put "I-W-A-N-T-S-E-X-Y-O-U together. SIr, not really but that was kinda impressive. Me: I know...

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How much does a polar bear weigh? 1000 pounds

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Has someone been following you? Cause I've been seeing people behind your back.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Woman: Seriously you are like the perfect man, I barely even met you and want to marry you already! What is your name by the way? Guy: My name is Le Petite Chessedeburger Withnowhitesauce! Woman: I am gay by the way, gotta go feed my uh... my wife yeah my wife.

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Hey i got a job for you. But it blows.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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