If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put "your sister" and "I" together.

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Your breast is like a beer holder, you would allow me to store beer in between your breasts, while I talk on the phone

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roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

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guy: can i rape you? girl: No Guy: great that means any sex we have from now on is consensual, thanks

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ANYWAY... I have been married for around X years right? (My wife is anon because reasons valid reasons!) And I told my wife "Babe, you know what you got married into baby, how about you and I consider having a third one in the bed... No not a guy, thats disgusting, you agree? Awwride! So anyways, she was like "Uh... Ask me again in a year I need to think things trough, and I want you for myself..." Next week we was fucking my new (back then neighbor) which is 28 or whatever (I dont remember my neighbors name BAHAHA (actual laugher)... Peeps, say what you want about me, ill be the one fucking the prom queen tomorrow... And you know, maybe someone else, sex with more than my waifu the prom queen is addictive, I mean sharing (salive, cum juices) is caring right? Okay, I better stop here, Rebecca (SHADDAP AUTOCORRECT ITS HOW HER NAME IS SPELLED... I guess) is upset... No not because I am typing this, but because I am out here freezing my ballz off smoking her ciggs... Man The great stuff about "decent equipment" is that I dont need all that much energy, just the speed to keep the girls screaming!

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Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

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I stole this pickup line from Antipickupline.com.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? We are both religious figures at the head of our places of worship.

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- If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. - Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

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Got milk? Cuz baby, im of it!

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Man: Wanna come to my place? Woman: Maybe if you take of the ski-mask and black clothing... Man: But then you'll ruin the surprise! :(

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"Can I buy you a drink or do I have to have sex with you first?"

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Did it hurt when you fell from the whore tree and banged every single guy on your way down?

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Does anyone have a toothpick? I need to pick the crabs out of the cracks of my teeth.

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Man: Hey you female? Cuz I am a horny man and... *door slams*

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I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

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Tenth year anniversary Marriage. So what was your name again? Annoying Bitch? Old Hag? I forgot...

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Five dollar women... WOO!

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hey you look like a good practice girl.

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Let's not turn this rape... into a murder

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-Are you Jamaican 'cos jamaican me crazy! -... *stabs*

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I'm craving some bacon, wanna strip?

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Guy: Hey want to hear a joke about my penis? No wait it's too long Girl: Hey want to hear a joke about my vagina? No wait you won't get it.

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Hey this is crazy and I just met you so here's the kitchen a sandwich maybe?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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