- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

I've got candy.

hey angel you duh sexy , if you duh rice i eat you everyday-pha haha

fancy going halves on a bastard?

why was the girl stupid beacuse she had brain sergy

Boy: So...Um...How's life? Girl: Great, until you came along.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilised.

What happens if an Internet troll has a heart attack Doesn't matter nobody will care

So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

You're a bit heavier but i think I can fit you in a barrel.

here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

-hey baby wanna get a drink? -no but i wanna get the heck away from you

Were your parents chemists? cuz you look like TEST TUBE BABY :D

Don't turn this rape into a murder.

if i see you naked i'll die happy Well if i see you naked i'l die instandly

Female: Hey do you wann- Male: You got a purty mouth

-Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I'd be in prison.

greetings clarisse...

MALE: We can do this the easy way or the hard way. FEMALE: Excuse me? MALE: Hard way it is zip FEMALE: gurgle gurgle scream

-Are you Jamaican 'cos jamaican me crazy! -... stabs

- I would love to get into your pants... - You can't: I have an asshole in there already.

-Are you free anytime soon? -No. I'm very expensive

I might not be the best looking guy here but im the only one talking to you

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book