- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Baby, I'm no Flintstone, but I can sure make your bed rock...

Guy: I think I got lost in your eyes. Girl: Here's a GPS. Go find yourself.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun so get in the van.

Guy- Hey, wanna come back to my place? Girl- Umm... I don't think 2 people can fit in that box...

Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

Man: I will make the rape on you now woman! Woman: Wow great Borat imitation bravo! Man: Borat who? draws gun Moral: Pretty immoral

-Did you fall from heaven? Because your an angel -No but did you? Because your face is fucked up!

-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

Male: I'd give her one Female: I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last person on earth Male: I was rating you out of 10 you ugly bitch

Male: are you from Tennessee? Female: yes, why? Male: because Tennessee has great food. Do you think we could travel there together.

Boy: Are you Mc Donalds? Girl: Why because your loving it? Boy: No because ur fat and greasy!

Are you an angel that fell from heaven? If you are, can I take a picture of you as proof that supernatural beings exist?

M- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? W- I'm an atheist.

McDonald's isn't the only thing that is super-sized...

him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

who wants to play EPAR

Him: Nice legs. What time do they open? Her: Members only, I'm afraid,

-Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots? -Sorry, I don't date outside my species.

Heard at a bra: Hi I am Moral man, the third most infamous guy at a list where Beiber is first. Girl: OMG I MUST HAVE YOU! Moral: ooooh... ANTI Joke duh... I thought this was great pickup lines!

BOY: Are you a chicken? GIRL: Why? BOY: Because I'll like you to lay on my eggs all day...

girl - holy sausage! boy - what happen! girl - i broke my foot! boy - oh!

-Hey baby, are you from Tennessee? Because you're like a solid 7.

I love every bone in your body, especially mine.

I am sick of pretty girls, I want something sick smelly disgusting, fat or anorexic, with a personality that kills flowers and that makes me vomit... I guess you will have to do for now. :( Moral: At least she was not the perfect match huh? Always look at the bright side of eternal darkness.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book