Man: I bet you havent seen a really big dick before ;) ;) Woman: No... but I have seen yours... The man proceeds to stare at the floor and leaves in shame...

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and G and L and Y together because that is what you are.

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I'm a black belt at pretty much everything, Karate, Larate, Jiu-Jitsu, Kickpunching, Beltmaking, Taekwondo.........bedroom...|:D ~Rick, the Adventure Sphere

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- Hey, what do you do for a living? - Female impersonator

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Hello little girl would you like some candy, yes? ;-)

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Him. "I'd sure like to get into your pants." Her. "No thanks. One asshole in my pants is my limit."

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- Haven't we met before? - Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.

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Are your parents retarded? Because you sure are special.

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Tonight might be a convienient night for us to have some intercourse.

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Him: Has anyone ever told you that you are absolutely beautifull...?? Her: (smiles) and says no.. Him: there is a good reaseon for that..

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If I said you had a beautiful body I'd be lying.

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Man: Wanna see the best pick up line ever? Its an ancient secret kept for millions of years! Girl: SURE! Man: It only reveals to the fully drunk though so lets get drinking.. Girl: uh... okay... I guess.. Man: Drunk enough? Girl: Ulp... you betcha weird man! Man: Ok its hidden at my place so lets go! Girl: WOHOO!

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Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

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Yeah you got me there dude, you really got my bragging rights... I am here with some "just" (nothing special) friend of my wife, that is wearing me out as she wont get off my Swagger, but while mentioning it like this makes me just as depraved as her... Gotta say, woman pleading me to get jumping on my cock, while my wife makes us breakfast... ...Im done being the king, im a fucking God. Anyway, "Eriksen" (you know who I mean) is pissed at me because I was supposed to be at work, and he apparently spends time here looking for me when he knows I am getting down and... Man this woman needs the cock... I mean at this rate she will bang me to death... ...But what a way to go. But seriously, would I really be at work, and allow you to come get my/now your car from garage whose walls are so paper thin that the police and securitas would be on your ass if I was not at least nearby? (well securitas are lazy, but as a lawyer, I benefit from suing them... Again) There are like eight alarms there, and you so gangsta you would get jailed. UPDATE: Punches, not slaps, remember the guy who punched that sweet chick when he got drunk, and then you punched me down and I got up and broke your jaw? Yeah that shit stings still, Five punches, at any time (no haymakers hey, I know my haymakers/uppercuts) but you take five punches... The fuck am I talking to, whigs is here already... Moral: I wont just write this shit just to make it all disappear with a delete button, fuck, im a super sayan!

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I scream, You scream, The Police come, It's Awkward...

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I have a lot of family that lives there, maybe we're related.

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Guy:Are you wearing space pants, cause that ass is out of this world! Girl:No, they're baseball pants, cuz this ass is out of your league.

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hey bitch

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

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So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

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McDonald's isn't the only thing that is super-sized...

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M: On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight? F: North Korea

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"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

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you have your job, I have mine, so let's do it in the kitchen

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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