- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

girl- how much does a polar bear weigh? girl- enough to break the-- boy- Are you talking about an adult polar bear? boy- then it's around 400-500 kg girl- blast!

Guy: Would you like to dance? Girl: no Guy: Good! Because I have to go take a shit!

Man: Your so hot, i think heavens missing an angel Girl: ... Man: ... Girl: ... Girl 2: Sophie turn your hearing aid on Man: oooh.

whats it like being the only beautiful girl in the world? Whats it like having the smallest dick in the world?

At some random bar: Man: I am Duke Nukem! Woman: DISGUSTING! Man: Huh? Moral: Sometimes you have to play the new games to understand the old...

Man: Hey, you dont look that fucking ugly, wanna go home with me? mirror: shatters Moral: If your ugliness ever shatters your mirror let me know, ill look at it and it will assemble itself back on its own.

-wow I could just drown in the ocean of your eyes -well why don't you -well I'll steal your sisters number, get lost at sea, and shipreck in her bed Then you can come and save us when she is shouting S.O.S out of the other room

On a scale from 1 to 10, can I get your number?

Male: Are you from Tennessee? Female: Why? Male: Cus you look like an inbred hick

Roses are red, violets are blue. When I take a shit I think about you bitch flushes the toilet

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Male: I'd give her one Female: I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last person on earth Male: I was rating you out of 10 you ugly bitch

Man: Lust is a terrible thing! Woman: I agree. Man: So come home with me and help me get rid of it.

M: On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight? F: North Korea

if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

What did the priest say to the rabbi? We are both religious figures at the head of our places of worship.

Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Yeah sure, ill just go grab my gag and handcuffs. Male: ...

You smell just like my mom...

haha

Are you on your period, because there's a blood stain on your pants

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book